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Original poster

Does this sound OK regarding Piano Lessons?

27 replies

TheSweetestHalleluja · 14/09/2022 11:35

Hi,
I'd be interested to know your thoughts/opinions on my daughter's piano lessons.

Her teachers are a married couple, I think the plan was originally that the wife of the couple would be her teacher, but as the wife regularly gets migraines, the husband takes over her lessons. She has only had 5 lessons so far and only 2 of those lessons have been with the wife.

When I took dd to her lesson this week, the husband took a while to answer the door (and the wife was in bed with a migraine) and he said the new rule is that we are to ring the doorbell and then send dd straight in to the front room to wait (she attends the lessons by herself) It turns out this is because he has had a fall and is in a brace and takes a while to come to the door. This feels a bit odd to me, as I would prefer to ensure I've handed dd over to another adult rather than just send her in to the house.

DD said that during her 30-minute lesson he then went into the kitchen and made himself a coffee whilst shouting out finger numbers to her as she was left playing by herself.

Would you be happy with all of this, would you continue to send your dc to these lessons, or would you be looking for a new teacher? Would I be over-reacting to look elsewhere?!

OP posts:
A580Hojas · 14/09/2022 11:37

No I'd look for another teacher. They sound hopeless!

loobylou10 · 14/09/2022 11:37

No. I would send my child to a proper teacher. These 2 are not!

AndAnotherOneJoinsTheQueue · 14/09/2022 11:39

I'd be looking for another teacher.

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Shamoo · 14/09/2022 11:40

Totally unprofessional and weird. I would move her to a new teacher.

WaveyHair · 14/09/2022 11:41

Nope. Weird & unprofessional.

abovedecknotbelow · 14/09/2022 11:42

You need a new teacher

CloudPop · 14/09/2022 11:44

New teacher. Sounds like a dreadful setup

bodie1890 · 14/09/2022 11:46

He shouldn't need a coffee break in a 30 minute lesson. I could understand the rest but that's really unprofessional.

lunar1 · 14/09/2022 11:52

Find a new teacher!

Mardyface · 14/09/2022 11:55

Definitely not over reacting! If she likes it (and I don't really see how she would) it might be worth sticking with, otherwise look elsewhere.

As an aside and depending on age obviously you don't ever have to let your kid do something you don't feel comfortable with them doing in a stranger's house.

Stompythedinosaur · 14/09/2022 12:18

I wouldn't be willing to send my dc into a house with no sign of a teacher, and I wouldn't like the swapping around of who is teaching.

I wouldn't be too fussed about making a coffee as long as he was listening and engaging.

ladygindiva · 14/09/2022 12:22

Piano teacher here. Never ever would I
1 get someone else ( however qualified ) to replace me in lessons without prior notice
2 ask someone to hand over their child without being visibly present
3 disappear and make a coffee during lesson times
I'd be appalled and move them elsewhere.

TeaTurtle · 14/09/2022 12:24

Nope, also think this is unprofessional and weird. Maybe if this was a relative or family friend who you know and are not paying, but professional teachers, no way.

MrsAvocet · 14/09/2022 12:26

To be honest, my children's piano teacher might have done that kind of thing when they were older, and they'd happily let themselves into her house. In fact they'd probably let themselves in now, even though nobody has lessons any more!
And she always gave them way more time than we paid for anyway, so her popping out for a few mins to make a drink would be no big deal, especially by the time they were in the higher grades.
But that's in the context of a relationship that had developed between her and our family over a couple of decades and multiple children, not someone we barely knew and a child at the early stages of lessons. When we first started going there is absolutely no way she'd have done that. 5 mins to make a coffee might not be long but it's a big proportion of a 30 min lesson. In a short lesson like that I would expect 100% attention on my child 100% of the time. Especially given he has only taught your DD a few times and can't really know much about her or her ability yet. I'd look for another teacher.

AvecFenstre · 14/09/2022 12:30

No that doesn't sound right! I'd look for someone more professional.

daretodenim · 14/09/2022 12:39

Nope. Not ok. I had music lessons throughout most of my childhood in the teacher's house and the only time she went to get drinks was..never. She only drank if she was barely well enough to teach so needed a Lemsip or similar. She may have needed a whiskey after I'd left sometimes though 😂

My kids' piano teacher comes to ours. He cycles a long distance so occasionally drinks a bottle of water, which is not a problem (obviously) and doesn't leave the child.

Find a teacher who takes teaching your child seriously, rather than someone with the attitude that you're lucky your kid is there.

Floralnomad · 14/09/2022 12:41

Sending her in seems ok , but the coffee break doesn’t . Also no two people will teach exactly the same so you need the continuity of one teacher .

PlntLady · 14/09/2022 12:50

Very odd. I'm an adult beginner and my lessons are nothing like this. My teachers arrives, I offer a drink and we then go our 30 min lesson. My teacher uses a lap top and various books for his materials. He comments on my technique and often is able to give me guidance on improving from what he can see. I fail to see how effective tuition can be given by shouting fingers from another room. Switching between teachers alone will be disruptive enough.

Additionally there are so many reason not to be happy with not handing your child to another adult. The couple obviously have physical challenges. What if you just send your daughter in one day, the wife is in bed but the husband has had a fall? Now your child is in a position where she must deal with the situation on her own.

Definitely find another teacher. Just an all round add situation and it will be your child who is affected the most.

Original poster
TheSweetestHalleluja · 14/09/2022 13:35

Thanks everyone for your replies, I'm glad that I'm not alone in thinking it was a strange set up and not very professional. I will be looking for a new teacher. DD absolutely loves piano and very much wants to learn, but I will look for a different teacher.

OP posts:
horseymum · 14/09/2022 13:45

My kids let themselves in to teachers house after ringing bell but they've known her for years! It does sound like they may not be the best fit for you and your dad though, you really need to trust the teacher you choose, it's such a special relationship.

Lunabun · 14/09/2022 15:44

I've been playing piano essentially all my life - I've never once had a teacher go and make themselves a drink mid-lesson! I'd look for a new teacher.

mybest · 14/09/2022 15:51

I wouldn’t let my daughter be taught alone by a man. Call me paranoid 🤷🏾‍♀️

PhantomErik · 14/09/2022 15:55

DD has lessons in her teachers home for years, we used to knock & walk in & wait in the hall while the previous lesson finished (we waited in the car until 1 minute to the lesson time. Then we went into the lounge, I sat on the sofa while DD had her lesson (same room).

In 3 years her teacher has quickly made a drink twice, change in medication made him thirsty & an unusually hot day!

Extremely professional man but also friendly & relaxed.

I would find a new teacher who you both feel comfortable with.

Partato · 14/09/2022 17:37

No, this doesn't sound good.

I would also want to attend the lessons to know how to support at home.

thirdfiddle · 14/09/2022 17:46

My violin teacher used to go and make coffees, take long phone calls and chat to her mum during lessons. Very unprofessional, but she was the only teacher in town at the level I was studying and I didn't want to travel.
If he's already doing this when you're new, it will get worse if you stay. Run.
Re the going in - I would suggest you go in with pupil then you can still hand over in person.
Re the swapping teachers - don't like it, you should have option for a refund if you prefer IMO.

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