Child behind in primary school

[NELondonDad]

Hello all
I'd be very grateful for any thoughts from folks who have been in a similar situation. I've had a chat with our DD's Year 2 primary school teacher this morning and he informed me that she was "behind" in class (reading, maths). It took me by surprise and I've been left a bit shaken - as well as having feelings of guilt. There's going to be a meeting with a SENCO teacher, though our DD is not on the SENC register at present. We had been aware of some issues last year and she struggled with her phonics, but there was a great teacher and we also really make an effort (my wife especially) at home and had felt that she was back on track. It was clear to us that she struggled with maths (but then again I was hopeless at school too with maths and my wife would say she found it challenging). I'm feeling a bit sad, and shaken by it. Our DD is - we think! - a very happy little girl and doesn't appear to have trouble socialising with other children (though she can be shy), is able to hold eye contact and chats away (she has a good volcabulary and is very creative, loving art in particular). There are flashes of a temper at home and she hates being hurried, but overall we have been very happy with her progress. Looking for any thoughts, advice, reassurances please! If a Senco teacher is being brought in does it necessarily mean she'll go on a Senco register (not that this is a bad thing in itself if it means support that needs to come is there) x

Being on the SEN register just means she will get extra support with the areas she is behind in ,there will be lots of children that struggle in some areas and need extra support ,it's a good thing the SENCO is on the ball.

Thanks x2boys . That's reassuring

Whatever you do, don't pass on a 'maths is hard' message to your child.
If she 'hates being hurried' I wonder what her general processing speed is like?

Children develop at different rates and do things when they’re ready in my experience. When (many years ago) my elder son was in year 2 his teacher told my husband and me that he had a disconnection in his brain…
I got myself into a terrible lather about that.
He’s now a very happy and successful GP after having achieved outstandingly at both secondary school and uni.
School can be very narrow, testing and judging few things; if she gets extra help great! I hope it all works out for you all.

When a friend's daughter was in year 1, the teacher told my friend that her daughter was 'nice but dim'. (Yes - I know!!!)

Nice but dim now has a first class degree and is working on an MSc. She was just summer born and needed a bit of time to find her feet.

As a primary teacher, I 100% agree that children develop at different rates. But I also agree that you should do everything you can to not say that you struggled with maths yourself or that maths is hard. Instead, play lots of games so that she gets used to rolling dice or recognising the dot pattern on dominoes.

I'm more or less in the same boat. DD is also struggling. I've downloaded the "teach your monster" apps to help have fun with it. Also bought a really nice activity book. When I get home I'll post a picture of it :)

Definitely make it fun for her. Otherwise she'll start disliking school and then you'll have an even bigger issue on your hands.....

DS1 was put on both the SN and G&T registers in y2. In y3 he was diagnosed with dyslexia and dyspraxia. Things began to click much more for him in y5/6.

Sometimes maturity helps, sometimes the extra support helps. Sometimes it's both.

From my experiences with DS1 and DS2, it's definitely easier when teachers are recognising the issue and supporting.

This one. Got it from Aldi

This is probably against all the advice but have you tried playing Smartie maths with her at the weekend?

Amazing how much attention some dcs pay when they get to eat the results. Not pressurised or serious, just practising basics as a game.