Things I'm embarrassed to have realised so late in life...

[OrangeFlowersAreLovely]

Those ID necklaces? I had absolutely never heard of the word "lanyard" until around 3 years ago. All my friend's children learnt this way before I did. If you had told me "Lanyard" was a European city - I'd have believed you.

That little press send arrow in the top right hand corner? It only occurred to me in my mid 30s that it is in fact a paper aeroplane. I just thought it was a dodgy triangle.

I was absolutely stunned to find out the woman who plays Amanda in Motherland is not Catherine Tate.

Any confessions to console me I'm not the only one failing at life?! 😃

I felt like name changing for this as I'm so ashamed of this. I was 40 before I realised sprouts grew on thick stalks like bobbles on a stick and I was amazed. Even worse because I grew up partially on a farm!!!

No way! I thought they were called that because they look like him. I don't believe you!

One I read recently and hadn't realised myself (despite being a huge fan) is that the Beatles are the BEATles as in "beat", not the Beetles. Blew my mind that! 😂

Hence the American rip-off group being called The Monkees rather than The Monkeys.

@Parr1960 Soon to be ex husband.

I only found out that Dr Christian was gay when my husband told me. Had spent years lusting after him!

His name is Christian, or Dr Jessen. "Dr Christian" is a puerile television affectation.

nannyKatherine no they are getting confused with Ireland/ Northern Ireland. Seems like some basic geography is still missing in action. It's a bit sad really. But NI is always forgotten about, no charge there! Q

That the Dali Lama was an actual Real Person. Had always thought he was a fictional character until I saw some footage of him on tv one day.

I was a physio and I think someone was having you on. I AM a gardener, and they aren’t tall or strong enough for sure. Also, they stink of old cabbage.

There is a kind of Kale called ‘walking stick kale’ because it grows unusually tall. But it’s just a likeness to a walking stick, not an actual use. Sorry.

After my first failed attempt at sticking the swab all the way to the back of my throat, I just swabbed both nostrils instead for all my tests, so didn't need to find out where my tonsils are.

We're in Caroline era. Based on the latin for Charles apparently.

@EntertainingandFactual Yes, Somebody please tell me I am not alone in thinking this.

We're in Caroline era. Based on the latin for Charles apparently.

Or Carolean, or Carolingian.

I'd have thought this Charles would like to be compared with Charlemagne.

For ages, I read the CF abbreviation on Mumsnet as C*NT FACE 😂

Until they die. When they fall off the perch. Oh! (It wasn’t until I had a chicken die on me and, well, fall off the perch, that I put that together!)

I also thought that flowers closed at night as a child. It just seemed right. I am now in my forties and have a degree in environmental biology, and I am STILL surprised when I go out in the dark and there are flowers.

In Harry Potter Diagon Alley=Diagonally, Knockturn Alley=Nocturnally and Grimauld Place=Grim, Old Place. You’re welcome. (I didn’t know the Hans Christian Anderson or Cruella De ville ones though. Cool!)

I lived near a place called Ibstock as a child, but we never went there, just saw it on signs. I though it was called Poundstock until I was about 14. I also though that various Enid Blyton girls became Minotaurs, not monitors. We also called Lametta, Lamenta. I have no clue why, but we were just wrong.

its another THINK coming. People have just accidentally changed it to thing

I once worked with someone who didn’t realise that the Pope was a real human as opposed to some sort of invisible spirit or deity. We were in our early 20s.

Not only that but the circumstances in which this misunderstanding was revealed was in itself funny. Colleague had served a table and had said to the customers: ‘Sorry to keep you waiting. Can I get you some drinks?’
Customer: Is the Pope a Catholic?!
Colleague: I don’t know
(At which the customers obviously laughed) So colleague came into the kitchen, recounted the conversation and asked us why the customers had laughed. The ensuing conversation revealed the extent of our colleague’s confusion 😂

Is that not Hilborough, no s?

I used to think when a pope died and they were deciding on who the next one was that if the smoke was white then it was a white pope and if the smoke was black it was a black pope 😳 I was 40 when my mum corrected me 🙈

@Eeksteek Some flowers do close at night though…

I thought badgers were little furry creatures (the size of a ferret say) rather than the large lumbering creatures they actually are.

I didn’t realise gherkins were tiny cucumbers rather I thought they were a unique vegetable of their own called gherkin.

I’m don’t really know what happens when you sell your first home to buy a more expensive second place … do you have to save up a deposit again to meet the difference between mortgage costs? Increase your mortgage repayments? Extend the mortgage term … I’m totally clueless especially as I’m very unlikely to be in the position (long term renter) 😞.

Jersey cabbage was used for walking sticks.
The stems were also used for other things.
I learnt this recently whilst at work (market garden)

Now my mind is blown 😂

😳I feel embarrassed now! I told so many people this ‘fact’ 😁

This is gold 😂😂😂

@WestendVBroadway, you are not alone. I also thought this until well into adulthood. I can’t really remember when or how I found out the truth, but even now that I know, I still hesitate a bit when faced with lift call buttons.