Losing someone, this week of all weeks

[PolkaDotShoes]

I too have lost someone this week, not immediate family, and not unexpected but still a sad loss for me and someone that leaves a big hole in my life.

With all the all the nation's attention on the Queen and the world coming to a stop for her. I feel like I want to say "Stop going on about the Queen and telling me what I can't do this week and what I should think and say and how I should act. What about MY loss? That's important too".

Of course I'm sad about the Queen, but I'm much more sad about my own loss.

Please remember that others have lost loved ones this week, it's not only the Royal Family.

My best friend lost her mum very suddenly yesterday. I’m heartbroken for her and I have been thinking of her as the world mourns.

Hiwever, to be completely blunt - my friend’s mum is not the Queen. The people who knew and loved her will mourn and celebrate her life. The same is happening with the Queen, on a larger scale because she was the world’s most famous and respected woman. It’s not a competition, and grief isnt being stolen from anyone. Sorry but it’s rather ridiculous to be jealous of a dead woman because more people are grieving for her than they are for others.

Sorry for your loss and I totally get where you’re coming from.

I feel for you. I had a friend whose mum died (very young) the same week as Diana. It was very, very hard for her.

Sorry for your loss

My Mum died the same day as Prince Phillip and I lost an old friend yesterday. It's tough isn't it?

Aside from those who were actually close to the queen, this will all quieten down in a few days. Hang in there.

That must have been devastating.

When my dad died, I couldn't have cared less what happened to anyone else. I didn't want to even want to discuss it with friends I was so sad. For me, because we're all different and we all experience things in an individual way, anyone else's death could not have impinged on my grief and other people's attention, or lack of it, would have had no impact either way.

I don't think, really, that my loss impacted anyone else's lives except close family. And I didn't expect anyone to pay attention to me because I only really cared about not seeing my dad again. Everyone else was peripheral.

Sorry for your loss.

I have just heard that DH's aunt has died. She was late 70's and had dementia so a relief to some extent that a stroke has taken her before the dementia worsened. It isn't a big loss to us as we were not close but I am thinking about her children and grandchildren, especially as everything feels a bit in the air with regard to whether there will be arandom bank holiday etc.

I’m sorry for your loss.

My relative died the same day as Diana PoW, and I completely understand how you feel. You feel like you are expected to grieve for someone you never met rather than the person you knew and loved.

Some people do get you want to talk about your loved one rather than the Queen. Find those people.

And, I should have added, I'm very sorry for your loss. It's immaterial it wasn't immediate family because the loss of anyone meaningful in your life, is so difficult to live with.

I’m sorry for your loss, OP, and to anyone else grieving a loved one.

I think I can understand what you’re saying, OP.

When someone close to me died, I wanted everything to stop. I couldn’t understand how people’s days were just continuing like nothing happened. Didn’t they know…? It’s like that poem…stop all the clocks…

But with the Queen, things are stopping. And I can imagine how that must feel unfair, irrational or not.

I’m sorry for your loss OP, and hope you can find some solace, somehow.

What GorgeousLady said. I felt exactly like that when my Mum died. I'm sorry for your loss.

My DF is on palliative care. He has days at the most….. 💔

I cannot agree more. Yesterday I attended a hospital appointment which I was hugely concerned about. I’m still very concerned but it wasn’t the worst case scenario (in my opinion!). I was slotted in as an emergency, the waiting rooms were busy and everyone was doing a great job. Later watching the news reporters at various palaces, I just thought of all the riches these people have and how the money could be used for something so much greater.

I know the queen was a hard working lady and again it’s my personal situation, but all this sadness. She was 96! She had a wonderful life. Save your tears for the children that died yesterday, for the actual children that lost mothers and fathers. It all seems so ridiculous.

I am so sorry for your loss. This is such a horrible time for anyone dealing with grief.

I lost a baby when a well known and loved public person died and it was unbearable having to cope with this public grief for someone they didn’t know when my life was falling apart around me. I couldn’t escape the grief for a moment either because every tv station went on about it and every radio station went on about it. When I tried to talk of my grief I was met with lots
of I know how you feel because “public person” makes me feel like that too. NO! You do not know how I feel because someone you’d never met and only seen on tv died, it is not remotely comparable to carrying a life and the dreams you hold for that life and then having that life taken away.

I’m sorry for your loss OP. I really have no time for this public outpouring crap for celebs and public figures.

Yes, I know just what you mean. Very sorry for yr loss OP

I lost my mum a few weeks ago. Today, I had to discuss the Queen's death with the class I teach. That was a tough call. Obv they didn't know but discussing a sudden death when you've just had a very personal loss is tough.

I'm sorry. I hope you're OK.

My MIL slipped away yesterday after a long illness. It feels very odd to have a personal loss and a national loss together.

We lost a family member yesterday. It's a very odd feeling.

My partner and I lost a dear, close friend aged 38 today. He died abroad, abruptly and under no unusual circumstances. Much as I respect the queen, I can't help but think 96 years is a decent innings. Our friend's passing has left a huge hole, a fatherless toddler, and so much shock, it has knocked his friends and family out completely.

I am so sorry for your loss, I understand completely what you mean and wish you strength going forward.