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Original poster

Kids sharing rooms

32 replies

Guineapiggiesmalls · 08/09/2022 23:31

We have two children, same sex, age 6m and 4. I’m tempted to have them share a room, although we have space for them to each have their own room… is this a bad idea?

I’d use the unused bedroom as a playroom, and I’d happily let them stop sharing when they get older. When I was younger I was always desperate to share a room but I’m not sure if the age gap is too much…

OP posts:

Yumchips · 08/09/2022 23:35

I'm also planning on doing the same, very similar ages. Curious to see your responses OP. I ovb think it's a good idea but wonder what the reality will be...

mondaytosunday · 08/09/2022 23:38

Will they use the playroom though? I find kids want to be where you are, and by the time the youngest is able to use the playroom the older will probably be wanting their own room.
Have you asked your four year old? How do you think it will work if baby is asleep and you put the older one to bed? And if your baby still wakes at night will baby wake up the older child?

Creepymanonagoatfarm · 09/09/2022 00:05

6 year gap here. Older ds desperately wanted to share. So they did for 6 years!

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Flatandhappy · 09/09/2022 04:07

I would. At one point we moved into a four bed house with three children but one bedroom was downstairs. DS 6 and DD 2 shared a bedroom and we turned the room downstairs into a playroom/tv room. It worked really well. We moved things around when they were 8 and 4 but if they were both boys or girls would have kept them sharing as having the playroom was brilliant.

Igmum · 09/09/2022 04:32

Sounds like a great idea (and might also save on heating this winter which is also good). Go for it

Doingmybest12 · 09/09/2022 05:38

Is that 6 months and 4 years? I wouldn't do this if there is a choice because I wouldn't want the 4 year old disturbed at night/early morning. Surely they play in each others rooms or in their own room of they want to (although at 4 months they will just be with you) . If you were asking about a 4 year old and 6 year old who were begging to share for a bit maybe but otherwise I don't know why you would . It sounds more like a toy storage issue and not wanting toys to take over living spaces?

GoAround · 09/09/2022 06:09

6 months and 4 years? No way, they won’t get anything out if it except disturbed sleep. Plus the playroom isn’t doable for both of them for a few years because many popular 4YOs toys are choking hazards to a baby/toddler. I have this age gap and even having them share on holiday is tough and they don’t sleep that well!

popandchoc · 09/09/2022 07:09

Mine started sharing at 1 and 5 and are still sharing at 7 and 11 as we only have two bedrooms. The eldest could do with her own room now but they were fine when younger.

Howmanysleepsnow · 09/09/2022 07:17

I wouldn’t have them share until the youngest will reliably not wake the eldest, and only then if the eldest wanted to.

Whoareyoumyfriend · 09/09/2022 07:19

Mine share. It's good but not ideal. But then again my eldest is autistic and a non sleeper. However I think given the choice they would stay together. 12 months between my boys

carefullycourageous · 09/09/2022 07:20

Mine shared, it was great until much older. I think there are real benefits to sharing, they learn to compromise and they become close. If it doesn't work for yours you can change.

GiantTortoise · 09/09/2022 07:22

Is your 6mo a very good sleeper? Otherwise I'd worry about the 4yo being disturbed in the night or woken in the morning. Also I agree with pp that mine wouldn't have used an upstairs playroom at that age unless I was there too. They wanted to be downstairs near me.

gogohmm · 09/09/2022 07:22

Mine shared until 6&8 and we had a spare room for my parents to visit then we moved to a bigger house with a 4th bedroom

dandelionthistle · 09/09/2022 07:23

I think there's nothing wrong in expecting children of that age and gap to share if there's no real choice, but I wouldn't choose it for the purpose of creating a playroom.

I think there's a lot of potential for sleep disruption (mine have a 6yr gap and when littlest was under 6mo we all shared one room - eldest quickly slept through baby night waking but whoever woke first inevitably woke the other, so there was often someone grumpy and tired.

I think a pp example where the playroom was downstairs is different - I can see why that was a less appealing bedroom and a more appealing playroom.

GiantTortoise · 09/09/2022 07:24

Mine shared btw. But not until they were a bit older.

CinnamonStar · 09/09/2022 07:25

Mine have the same gap, and shared from when the youngest was about 18 months, and out of the cot, for the next 7 years.

They enjoyed each other’s company and, crucially, could still have space from one another during the day because of the playroom.

Younger one was quite upset when elder one wanted their own room, but they love their own rooms now.

I think it can work brilliantly for younger children.

But I’d probably keep a 6 month old in with me a bit longer if it was feasible, tbh.

SatinHeart · 09/09/2022 07:28

GiantTortoise · 09/09/2022 07:22

Yeah this is what happened to us (smaller age gap though). Baby disturbed the toddler quite a lot, leading to cranky toddler in the daytime. As DC2 got older, couldn't do sleep training as it disturbed DC1 too much so DC2 is still a shit sleeper!

Agree about the playroom- they won't use it. Make the room into something nice for yourselves instead.

MassiveSalad22 · 09/09/2022 07:35

Why not? Sounds good. Playroom for the oldest initially because OP is obviously not going to let her 6 month old roam around down upstairs in a room of choking hazards. Honestly people!

DS1 (now 7) is a terrible sleeper and DS2 (now 4) has always just slept through any noise he made. It’s not guaranteed to be bad. People love to be negative!

stormelf · 09/09/2022 07:40

I put my oldest and middle child in together even though we had another bedroom. There is a two year age gap between them. It worked well for almost 2 years. Now my oldest (4) shares with my youngest (9 months) and middle child has his own room. I've not had any issues so far with 4 year old sharing with her baby sister, she is a very good sleeper and doesn't get disturbed when the baby cries

WashableVelvet · 09/09/2022 07:44

Same age gap, and ours have shared since smallest was 6m - was a great sleeper though! They don’t wake each other but sometimes they keep each other awake playing about after bedtime, so when possible we put little to bed first so they fall asleep before big goes to bed.

GiantTortoise · 09/09/2022 07:45

@MassiveSalad22 my 4yo wouldn't have wanted to play upstairs alone either if me and the baby were downstairs.

notasillysausage · 09/09/2022 07:52

Jumping on this thread, I hope it’s ok. I think it’s a lovely idea they share, if the oldest wants to and the youngest won’t disturb her sleep.
I have a 2 and 5 year old and I need to move the 2 year old in to share. My question/worry is how to keep her away from my 5 year olds little toys that could be a choking hazard??

DelurkingAJ · 09/09/2022 07:56

We tried it and rapidly gave up. DS1 is a lark who drops off instantly at 8pm and wakes at 5:30. DS2 chatters until 9:30 and wakes at 7:00. End result, two exhausted and furious DSs.

Notplayingball · 09/09/2022 11:09

The eldest gets used to the noise in each bedroom where they share. I have been through this now with two sets of children. It's not really a big deal.

Original poster

Guineapiggiesmalls · 09/09/2022 17:37

I should’ve clarified, we have three bedrooms downstairs, so the potential playroom would also be downstairs.

lots of interesting opinions, thank you. The 4 y/o is keen, and I guess the key thing is that it’s not permanent and we do have the space to revert if it doesn’t work out. I just thought there were benefits to them sharing (other than space).

OP posts:

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