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Original poster

Ex got a solicitor to write (continued)….

26 replies

Piedsta · 07/09/2022 10:42

I can’t link my thread and have now given up. Late in pregnancy and ex hasn’t spoken for 2 months despite me (VERY pleasantly) trying to talk about matters. Suddenly get letter from solicitor saying he wants paternity test immediately and if he’s the father he will discuss other matters via his solicitor and that he wants to be on birth certificate etc in that situation. I thought we were in a committed relationship so paternity test was a surprise but I replied saying I wanted to know his broad proposals first via a conversation between ourselves on text so I could know he was prepared to be amicable and then I would do the test. Also flagged i could just do this by cms if not. All I really want to know from him is whether he wants a relationship with dc so I can be prepared. it’s been a week and I’ve been anxious waiting for reply. Nothing. Do you think he’s gone away now? It’s been horrible and stressful and I genuinely wish I’d never met him.

OP posts:
drpet49 · 21/02/2023 11:16

Lovetogarden2022 · 07/09/2022 14:12

No advice as such, but I would be very wary of putting him on the birth certificate, especially if he has links to abroad (you didn't mention he did, but even an uncle or brother or cousin abroad etc). A close friend from uni was in a similar situation - broke up whilst pregnant, it was a complete shock as they'd been together in, what she presumed was, a committed relationship for nearly 6 years, it was a wanted pregnancy etc.
He wanted putting on the birth certificate which she obliged to do, only to find out that he was planning on basically kidnapping their child and going to his uncle's house in The Gambia and living there with his parents and sister joining them a few months later! Technically as his name was on the birth certificate it wouldn't be queried by the airline/immigration etc. A word of warning!

Makes no difference. The father can apply to the court to have his name added to the birth certificate.

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