Please help am very low tonight.

[Downwardspiraling]

Have name changed . After an awful time in work recently I’m incredibly low tonight I feel broken by a job I used to love. I can’t talk to DH who is next to me asleep.

Basically I feel I’m being bullied in my workplace I dunno what to do or how to get out of this hole I’m in.

I can’t afford to go off in the sick, I’m at a total loss.

worst part is I work full time which means ds is here there and everywhere.

So sorry to hear you are feeling low. That feeling is a natural response to being treated badly by your colleague(s). Definitely time to have a chat with HR or whatever they call it these days. Don't let anybody steal your sparkle was a wonderful phrase I saw on someone's wall once. Stick up for yourself and be proactive. Bullies need to be stopped in their tracks. There will be many positive things in your life if you are in the headspace to identify them. Good luck with everything

Hello @Downwardspiraling I do feel for you . If you feel you are being bullied - do see whatever help your work might offer. It might seem hard but perhaps a shorter term hard thing rather than just letting the situation go on

That said , a great many things work themselves out , so please try not to let yourself go into a hole. (Easier said than done I know ) .

But keep breathing and one step in front of the other . I do not mean that to sound patronising . Truly not , I know people who have been in the same place.

All best wishes to you and do PM if you ever need to 🌹🌷💐
All best wishes and thoughts

Basilisk x

So sorry you are feeling so low. Everything feels worse in the middle of the night but bullying at work is awful, particularly as we spend so much time at work.

Are you a member of a union? Or could you raise it with HR ?

Advice from acas below

www.acas.org.uk/if-youre-treated-unfairly-at-work/being-bullied

I would keep a record of any incident of bullying in case you need evidence.
Would you be entitled to any sick pay at all if you were signed off by GP, just a short break might be good for your MH?

Ultimately it may be better to look for another job and save your sanity although it's really unfair to leave a job you previously .

You deserve to be valued and treated better💐

I hear you. Sending love.

I'm sorry you're feeling so low. I haven't got any advice on the bullying but could you get yourself some hot milk and a blanket and snuggle up on the sofa with some crap tv or music? I find a change of scene really helps when I am anxious and find it hard to sleep

@DeborahVance very good practical advice - I have a weighted blanket and it is astonishing to me how much it helps if ever worrying etc. & to @Downwardspiraling

Do you get sick pay?

Contact an employment solicitor in the morning

The advice from Runnerduck is spot on. I hope you are sharing this issue with your GP? They can be a good source of support. Perhaps could arrange counselling to help you sort out what to do? Xx

I’m with you. It’s really hard when you aren’t respected in the workplace and it’s awful when you are bullied. Do yourself a favour and look for a new job or put your head down and work extremely hard to overcome it.

I am the only women in my division. There are 4 women in the top 3 layers from the CEO down and I’m one of them. Today, like the past two months, I was ignored by people junior to me. I’m seen as ‘admin’ so I sit quietly and nail them with performance. I have my bonus guaranteed for this year. I have a sign on bonus to collect too.

Im in my 40s and today had the lovely experience of the guys talking about getting laid by their girlfriends and wives. Im networking like mad and will move elsewhere after my bonus is paid out if I don’t get a fair review. To be fair, the guy I used to work for was mortified by the chatter and pulled them in a room to give them a talking to. Regardless, I don’t need that. You just don’t talk like that at work.

I tried to reply at 1.30 this morning op but my phone was playing up.
Sorry you were feeling this way op, the wee small hours are awful for whatever is playing on your mind.
When I was younger my mum was being relentlessly bullied at work, she is small and a gentle meek character, but she has strength, discipline and SO much compassion, she was working on a children's ward and doing wonders for her patients, she focused on them and it got her through but her horrible colleagues were really bringing her down, they thought she was beneath them and worth nothing.
She searched for and eventually got a new job, I was working in my first job so had money and took GREAT pleasure in having the most enormous stunning bunch of flowers delivered straight to her ward on her last day. She loved it and said their faces were an absolute picture as the porter walked through the ward, past her tormentors, asking for her by name and age left with her head held high.

The reason I want to tell you is because it is a good illustration I think of how it's not you it's them and your worth is not reflected in how they treat you.

In my work currently we are really struggling to recruit, SO hard to find good candidates, it is a good time to be looking for work right now if you have any skills/experience that are at all transferable... Is that an option for you?

Sending solidarity.

Thank you for all the good kind words.

I will try and answer questions.

Thanks to who suggested ACAS I have spoken to them in the past they were helpful.

With regards to union I am in one yes. They have said I could go for constructive dismissal. I don’t want to at this stage but am building the case.

I can’t afford to go on statutory sick pay.

I am looking for other jobs but it is hard around here.

I have times dates of everything.

i can’t see the wood from the trees.

That's horrid op, but brilliant that you have Union support to guide you through, so many people don't.

Roughly what area are you in? Just wondering if we might have any ideas for other roles.