Hi, a bit of background too start, I've been married to my partner 7 years in November, we had our first child in 2018 since then we haven't slept in the same bed as he didn't want to be woken up, so I did every night feed with our son who was premature, then 2021 I gave birth to our daughter who also he has never had at night time, my son is so used to sleeping with me that I've had to have both of them with me every night, this has resulted in me and the children sleeping on the living room floor whilst the husband has the king size bed in the bedroom ( we live in a chalet) I do all the house work, Meals, cleaning, looking after animals (we have a lot 5 dogs, 12 cats, chickens, geese, ducks, turkeys, horses, donkey and a pig, parrot and 2 budgies) I don't drive so I'm stuck here 24/7, My partner works 10-2 approx a day and when he gets home within 1 hour he's complaining of a headache and of to sit in bed on discord or his games, so then I make tea, clean up, feed animals (have to ask him to watch children whilst I do this or I have them with me doing it all one handed whilst carrying baby) I never get a shower without a child with me, but tbh they are my absolute world and having no family or friends they are the only reason I get by, I lost all my friends when we got together but been young and in love I thought he was all I needed. Anyway, I'm due to take my driving test in 3 days and since then he's decided he doesn't want to be with me, he wants to go out and "find himself" and I'm horrible for calling him useless when he feels that he does help ( I admit when I've been emotional and just wanting help I have called him useless but that is because he is I do absolutely everything and if he did leave it would be just one less Wash load and meal cooking for me) His family have never liked me we see his mum maybe 3 times a year which I reach out and arrange we only live 5 miles away so no excuse and she does drive but doesn't make the effort,anyway I feel they are pushing him to get joint custody which I never want to deprive my kids from their dad but I honestly don't trust him, he shouts at our daughter to the point she's literally hyperventilating and I have to run and get her (many of times I cook meals etc 1 handed) our son he is better with now he's older (4) but he still play fights and makes him cry or has smacked him on occasion when he's misbehaved (I completely disagree with smacking my children, they aren't bad and can easily be calmed down with talking) sorry for the long winded post I just needed to get it out I honestly have no one and feels my Worlds breaking and he's making me out to be the bad person when all I've ever done is look after my family, am I okay to suggest a 80/20 spilt or even some weekends, I don't want him having our daughter over night she still wakes for bottles and he has never done it he would sleep through or get angry, am I okay to say no nights for her? I'm so lost x