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Why do men do this? Crazy story alert of an ex

14 replies

Starsinyoureyes13 · 29/08/2022 22:11

Years ago I had a casual fling after talking online with a man, we'd met up few times and I hoped it would turn into something more. He dumped me, I begged, he got nasty and cut me off. I blocked him from social media and changed my number as you do when someone states that they don't want you. Few years later he contacts me through a stupid app called kik, I basically told him to leave me alone as I remembered all the horrible things he said to me. I joined a dating site and he found me on that being his usual nasty self, I found out he had recently had a baby with a girlfriend he had so found out the girlfriends name and searched for her and sure enough days before she had just given birth, sickened told him I knew he had a kid and all the "I've changed" from him was bs so deleted the dating app and went about my life that was until I got an email , yes a bloody email from him typed hi, and a second with hello i've not replied as don't want him to know its an email I use for work or he will keep messaging me.
Seriously what is his problem, He dumped me 10 years ago?
I know it's not for sex, because he announced to all I was terrible at it, its not for money as I've none. All it leaves me is feeling down as I remember how awful he was to me. Does he seriously hate me so much as to do things like this?

OP posts:
Starsinyoureyes13 · 29/08/2022 22:14

Ps have no intention to talking to him again but doesn't stop the awful memories of how nasty he was to me, things he said about me. It makes me feel small and I can't help it. I can ignore his blatant attempts of attention seeking but I can't ignore the past feelings and depression :(

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SteerClear · 29/08/2022 22:19

What a prick.

Yes, the best thing is to not respond at all. He's sounds like a serial cheater and control freak. You had a lucky escape all those years ago.

Stay strong, ignore the emails and if he continues trying to reach you warn him you'll report him for stalking. Hopefully that will make him back off.

Gaveitall · 29/08/2022 22:22

He’s stalking you.
It might get worse.
Drop into your local police station & ask for advice.
Keep all evidence.
Stay strong.

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ABoynamedsue2022 · 29/08/2022 22:22

There’s no real rational reason to this and you know that.
he may just be an arsehole
he may think you liked him that much back then that you will be jumping for joy at being contacted by him
hes a lunatic

no matter which one it is, you have no interest in reply so don’t.
leave him to it.

he’s just a sad loser who’s sat in his saggy boxers with crumbs on his chest or in his beard, messaging an old flame that he was a cunt to from 10 years ago…
what does that say about him..

your far to fabulous to even remember him my darling, prove it by not replying.
❤️

Hopeandlove · 29/08/2022 22:25

He’s stalking you don’t respond and pass everything to the police. Give them all his contacts and say you want to be left alone and can they contact him and warn him off. If he contact you again pass direct to the police and ask them to take action

Starsinyoureyes13 · 29/08/2022 22:33

ABoynamedsue2022 · 29/08/2022 22:22

There’s no real rational reason to this and you know that.
he may just be an arsehole
he may think you liked him that much back then that you will be jumping for joy at being contacted by him
hes a lunatic

no matter which one it is, you have no interest in reply so don’t.
leave him to it.

he’s just a sad loser who’s sat in his saggy boxers with crumbs on his chest or in his beard, messaging an old flame that he was a cunt to from 10 years ago…
what does that say about him..

your far to fabulous to even remember him my darling, prove it by not replying.
❤️

I have no intention of ever replying to him. He chatted to me years online and chased me, got me and then dumped me. I didn't just lose someone I liked, i lost my best friend as you don't chat to someone for years and not become close. It's the cheek of messaging me when he had a gf whod just had his baby. I think that's why I'm sad because for all his shit he done to me I'd never in a million years think hed do that to his newborn kid or mother of newborn. Guess never really know people know matter how close you become.. And it's weird because I genuinely did like him at one point now I hate him

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whatwhhat · 29/08/2022 22:35

He sounds unhinged. And fwiw you can't be that bad if he's still pestering you tens years later...so his words mean nothing please remember that.

Honestly to get a private email he's doing more than just a quick Google/social media search. I think I'd report to the police.

Starsinyoureyes13 · 29/08/2022 22:40

whatwhhat · 29/08/2022 22:35

He sounds unhinged. And fwiw you can't be that bad if he's still pestering you tens years later...so his words mean nothing please remember that.

Honestly to get a private email he's doing more than just a quick Google/social media search. I think I'd report to the police.

Its an email address I've used for about 15 years, i may have at one point at beginning of us used it to contact him, maybe sent something who knows, but for past 4 years used it as a work email..so it's not one I use for personal stuff. I won't go the stalking route because there's a chance I gave him it years and years ago^^

OP posts:
ManAboutTown · 29/08/2022 22:43

ABoynamedsue2022 · 29/08/2022 22:22

There’s no real rational reason to this and you know that.
he may just be an arsehole
he may think you liked him that much back then that you will be jumping for joy at being contacted by him
hes a lunatic

no matter which one it is, you have no interest in reply so don’t.
leave him to it.

he’s just a sad loser who’s sat in his saggy boxers with crumbs on his chest or in his beard, messaging an old flame that he was a cunt to from 10 years ago…
what does that say about him..

your far to fabulous to even remember him my darling, prove it by not replying.
❤️

@ABoynamedsue2022 - you forgot the bits about watching Pornhiub in his mother's cellar but otherwise I suspect this is very close to the mark.

He sounds like a total arsehole

ABoynamedsue2022 · 29/08/2022 22:46

He’s proven that he’s an arsehole by what he did to you.
very few people have levels of arseholeness, if he’s one he’s one across the board.
it would be odd to think that he can treat one person like that but wouldn’t dream of treating somebody else like that simply because they have birthed their DNA.
if it’s in them, then it’s in them forever regardless.

this man is a disgrace, he’s not even just a small disgrace, he’s been this way for many many years and will never ever change.

be carefull and I would tell you to call and log it if he continues to attempt to contact you because as we know, things can escalate aswell as just come from nowhere
❤️

Starsinyoureyes13 · 29/08/2022 22:53

ABoynamedsue2022 · 29/08/2022 22:46

He’s proven that he’s an arsehole by what he did to you.
very few people have levels of arseholeness, if he’s one he’s one across the board.
it would be odd to think that he can treat one person like that but wouldn’t dream of treating somebody else like that simply because they have birthed their DNA.
if it’s in them, then it’s in them forever regardless.

this man is a disgrace, he’s not even just a small disgrace, he’s been this way for many many years and will never ever change.

be carefull and I would tell you to call and log it if he continues to attempt to contact you because as we know, things can escalate aswell as just come from nowhere
❤️

I deleted it as not to give into temptation of replying to tell him to eff off. If that was 10 years ago I'd be thinking he still liked me, that's the even sadder part, actually that's quite funny, he's not even good looking, he's just a small squat little man of 5'5 and that was what I fell for? I doubt he's changed looks wise but defo older obv and no interest to find out, he can go and take his short arse to hell. Actually burst out laughing now was I a loser or what. I have other exes I get on great with, just friends knew them since I was a teen, no problems with any of them. Some on Facebook, occasionally see them about and say hi. So maybe I'm not a bad person just shortsighted

OP posts:
Surtsey · 29/08/2022 22:58

Starsinyoureyes13 · 29/08/2022 22:40

Its an email address I've used for about 15 years, i may have at one point at beginning of us used it to contact him, maybe sent something who knows, but for past 4 years used it as a work email..so it's not one I use for personal stuff. I won't go the stalking route because there's a chance I gave him it years and years ago^^

Whether or not you gave him your email address years ago is totally irrelevant when it comes to stalking. If he does carry on contacting you like this, then please do speak to the police as he might have form for this already. You may not be his only victim, and he needs to stop.

ABoynamedsue2022 · 29/08/2022 22:59

Your not a bad person.. at that time In your life you liked him, he was a dick to you and about you..
it’s now a million years later and he’s trying to do the same thing again, don’t let him.
Put him out of your mind.
even a “fuck off” response, is a repose
don’t give him one
❤️

Starsinyoureyes13 · 29/08/2022 23:14

ABoynamedsue2022 · 29/08/2022 22:59

Your not a bad person.. at that time In your life you liked him, he was a dick to you and about you..
it’s now a million years later and he’s trying to do the same thing again, don’t let him.
Put him out of your mind.
even a “fuck off” response, is a repose
don’t give him one
❤️

I won't, I don't want him to know its an active email as I do need it for work. Usually everything that's not work related gets automatically put to spam but that didn't, its been deleted and trash emptied. I'll never speak to that man again, there is no redeemable qualities of him, I'm all for forgiving people, but I'll never forgive anyone duping and catfishing me on dating sites to speak to me who has a baby, pretending to be other men ect ect. And the more I remember the more insane he does sound Forgot to mention that part the catfishing I gave up on dating sites after that. I thought last time I told him to bugger off 4 years ago and deleted kik that was it.. Its insane and crazy and downright weird. The stuff he done is long list and I should have gone to police but where would I even begin? I'm not an attractive woman, I'm average, I'm not intelligent, I don't have a great life, my job is low pay but its worthwhile as I enjoy it, there is no reason on this earth anyone would want to hurt and harm me.
I just wish he'd leave me alone for good.

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