What the hell should I do with my life?

[Itsabigworld]

Hello Mumsnetters. I'm really hoping someone can give me some divine inspiration. I live alone and am single. One adult child, very settled and happy. I'm 55. No relatives and few friends. I have 40k in Premium Bonds and a reasonable pension, and I earn money on an ad hoc basis when the work I do is available ( it lurches from feast to famine.) Some months are better than others money wise but usually I get by. The thing is I'm bored out of my brains and desperate for a new life. I have no ties here ( apart from adult son but he's fine) and only rent so not tied to a mortgage. After giving my landlord 2 months notice I could go anywhere in the world.. but what would I do? £40k is a decent chunk of change but it certainly won't last forever especially the way things are going! If I drained that money travelling the world or starting a new business I'd have nothing to fall back on. I'm in such a rut. Every day is bloody Groundhog Day and I'm sick of it. There's a whole world out there and I want to grab it in both hands and see where life takes me. But I'm drawing a complete blank as to what to do or where to go. I have a degree but think mid 50's is too old to start thinking of retraining at the bottom of the ladder. What would any of you do in my position?

Ooooh how fab. I’m here for the answers! I feel like you just need to decide on the first step or 2, and one thing leads to another and you never know where you’ll end up!! But so many fabulous things will happen if you say yes and it sounds like you will with your attitude 😃

I would spend some time working out what I liked and what my goals are. Maybe look at a 5 year plan & start working back from there - what do I want to have achieved in 5 yrs, 3 yrs, 1 yr, 6m, 3m.
Maybe read the Not a Life Coach book by James Smith & follow him & Paul Mort on Instagram (warning- they both do swear 😁). I've found both useful for working out what I want to do & then how to do it.
Maybe going travelling for 3 months would inspire you to work out what the next 5 years should look like.
God luck, it sounds exciting.

What did you love doing when you were younger that you haven't done for ages?
What do other people do that makes you deeply, achingly jealous or envious?
is there anything on your bucket list (if you have one) that the thought of achieveing would make you burst out laughing in disbelief because it was always such a far-fetched dream?

I'd start with answering these three questions and see what energises and excites you most from the answers.

40k can go a very long way. I came into a similar amount of money a while ago andwent on a long haul holiday to somewhere I'd always longed to go (best holiday ever); did some remodelling of the house, took some time off work to write a book, paid a personal trainer to help me get fit and lose weight. All four things were things that nagged at me, and I don't regret any of them. Still have well over half the money left.

Remember you donlt have to only do big things. You can start, while you are looking for a biger adventure, by having small adventures. Get a great seat for a London show you really want to see or a ticket to a gig of your favourite singer; sign up for residential creative or fitness course or wellbeing retreat; get a different hair colour and change your dress style for a while.

Or you could do the opposite of what I suggested and just get an interail ticket and work out what to do day by day - just be random and free for a month. Sounds like bliss.

Thank you so much .. this is exactly the kind of advice I was looking for and given me some food for thought. I feel like life is completely passing me by and I need to get out my comfort zone.

I would travel for 3 months in a cheap part of the world. Asia maybe?

Err why are you still renting? I guess if it was me I’d be looking to buy somewhere…retiring and paying rent does not sound fun.

Could you use the £40k to get a buy to let mortgage if you increased your income in the short term? Doing literally anything regardless of whether it’s what you normally do. Rent that out and then use any income for travelling.

Is there somewhere you’ve always wanted to live in the UK? Seaside, Snowdonia, big city, etc. Find work there and move. Join the local theatre group, coastal walking, lawn bowling, whatever group. Take up something new you’ve always wanted to try. Volunteer. Etc.

Go to Rome for two weeks. Then think about what to do next.
All roads lead to Rome.

If you can abandon work for a while, what about volunteering abroad or teaching English somewhere interesting for a year?

Oooh, lucky you, adventures await! You could take a TEFL course and try some p/t teaching abroad whilst travelling. Voluntary work in this country/abroad. Walk part of the coastal path or bag some Munros/Corbetts. Try something that you’ve never considered before. Go to a Michelin starred restaurant for a treat. If you’re good with DIY buy yourself a transit van and convert it to a camper. Write a novel or memoir after your adventures. Good luck, OP, and enjoy your freedom.

What about a solo costal walking holiday. Give you time to think what you want to do.

@AceSpades54321 unfortunately nobody will give me a mortgage as I don't have a regular income. I've tried believe me.

What would you like to be able to do if you could click your fingers and be able to do ? Sailing ? Open water swimming? Travel ? Visit different cities ? Paint ? Ski ? College course ?

Oooh, exciting! Stick your stuff in storage for a year and travel the world.

Something you have always wanted to do?

I think I would do Voluntary Service Overseas for a while.

Could you get a job with someone like Headwater, leading small group holidays abroad? It would be a chance for some paid travel and who knows what could come of it? New friends? A book? I am in a very similar position (VERY!) and I was thinking of doing that as soon as DC disappear to University.

These posts are wonderful. I'm reading and re reading all of them. Very tempted by practically any of these suggestions .. I just worry about the lack of security on my return if I did go travelling. I'd be a year older and possibly ( unless I work of course) much worse off. So much to weigh up!

How about house sitting all over the world? Or as someone suggest do TEFL but work online while you travel.

Yes my friends’ parents housesit long term eg live in a massive house in the south of France for the past year. I’m sure you can do it less long-term too! Good option.

I would do two seemingly opposing things - 1. I would not throw everything in for a grand gesture.

1. I would do something quick - like tonight. Do not overthink and get something booked to do. The thing I would do is book a ‘Wild Woman’ tour - they do female only tours of extraordinary places.

Do a decent TEFL Cert.... CELTA or Trinity .... doesn't even have to be done in the UK as a back up way to earn money and off you go exploring.
I did my cert after my degree as I couldn't decide what I wanted to do with my life and didn't want to stay in the UK, 20+ years later .... Still travelling and having adventures.

Wow @Cherryana ... just googled. I LOVE this!!

❤️

If it were me, I'd buy a motorhome/camper van and just take off! It's your home on wheels and you'd meet so many great people by travelling across the UK and maybe even Europe too? If you can work 'on the move' you can support yourself and when you're ready to come home, you'll be able to sell the motorhome and at least get some of your money back.

But seriously whatever you decide, what an exciting time of life!