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Original poster

How does it work with wills if you're married? Slightly complicated!

13 replies

Whichwhatnow · 07/08/2022 22:51

I am married (three years now, together for four). I have a house (rented out, bought in my sole name prior to meeting my husband and he has never contributed to the mortgage or lived there) with about £250k equity. I also have a pension pot, about £30k savings in my name and death-in-service insurance through work that's worth around £300k.

During my marriage (and before) I have always been the breadwinner. My DH does work but PT on min wage and has his own home that we live in. He was claiming benefits before I met him.

Our marriage has been difficult for a while and I have contemplated divorce, but it looks like it would potentially end up very complicated financially. At this moment I am content to keep working on our marriage.

BUT... I have also recently been diagnosed with a life limiting condition. I may be able to receive treatment (a transplant) but if not, I probably only have a few years left at most.

My question is - what happens to my assets on death? It sounds morbid but honestly, I have worked incredibly hard for what I have and would like the bulk of it to go to family (siblings and nieces/nephews). DH and I have no DC, shared or otherwise. I would want him to not have to worry (at least in the short term) so would leave him something, but realistically, he has his own property, his family are well off (mine are very much not) and he doesn't need several £100k. That money would be far better utilised by my family and might help some get on the property ladder etc.

I'm just a bit confused re how it works with wills etc. I know if we divorced now my DH would have some claim to my assets, even though they're in my sole name. Why does it seem to be different on death? It seems like (from Googling) I could leave my assets to whoever I choose, but surely this isn't correct? Could my husband contest it?

I know that the best option would be to discuss this with him openly but at the moment, with my very recent diagnosis and our general marriage issues, I just can't face it right now. I think he fully expects me to leave everything to him.

I also know I need to speak to a legal adviser, but hoping someone on here might have some experience first!

OP posts:
Stickmansmum · 07/08/2022 22:54

We’ll firstly you’re married so your DH would be entitled to a fair bit of it no matter what. I think you should speak to a lawyer about what is best.

Blossomtoes · 07/08/2022 22:58

I’m so sorry you’re so poorly, it must be so hard to get that news. At least you have time to put your affairs in order. You can nominate whoever you choose to receive your death in service payment so make sure you do that now. In your shoes I’d sell the house and give the money to your family or put it in trust now. Pass on as many of your assets as possible while you’re still here.

Qik · 07/08/2022 23:02

He can claim under an Act for provision to be made if he needs in and especially if he has been provided it in the past and relied on it.

One option might be to leave it on trust, on his death assets pass under that “Will Trust” to your family less any inheritance tax due. They would not inherit until he dies.

Speak to a qualified solicitor - preferably a TEP (STEP member).

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General money
FictionalCharacter · 07/08/2022 23:02

Yes, you can leave your assets to anyone you want. Yes he could challenge it, but he’d have to go to court. Definitely see a solicitor and explain your circumstances.

Original poster
Whichwhatnow · 07/08/2022 23:10

Blossomtoes · 07/08/2022 22:58

I’m so sorry you’re so poorly, it must be so hard to get that news. At least you have time to put your affairs in order. You can nominate whoever you choose to receive your death in service payment so make sure you do that now. In your shoes I’d sell the house and give the money to your family or put it in trust now. Pass on as many of your assets as possible while you’re still here.

Thank you. If I could leave the death in service money to family with no questions asked I'd be more relaxed about the rest I guess. It's just that my siblings are in situations (with DC, work etc) that mean they'd never be able to come up with a deposit to get on the housing ladder - if I could just leave the D.I.S. shared three ways (three siblings) that'd change their lives massively.

Unfortunately I can't do anything like sell the house or filter off assets now - although we don't have joint accounts etc my DH is very money focused and always asks where 'our' savings are etc so there's no way I could do that without him realising 😕

OP posts:
Original poster
Whichwhatnow · 07/08/2022 23:12

Qik · 07/08/2022 23:02

He can claim under an Act for provision to be made if he needs in and especially if he has been provided it in the past and relied on it.

One option might be to leave it on trust, on his death assets pass under that “Will Trust” to your family less any inheritance tax due. They would not inherit until he dies.

Speak to a qualified solicitor - preferably a TEP (STEP member).

Thanks - I wouldn't want to do that as we're only mid/late 30s so by the time he passes on the money would be probably of limited value to my siblings! I just hate seeing them struggle so much and know how much that money would change their lives and that of their DC.

OP posts:
Original poster
Whichwhatnow · 07/08/2022 23:13

FictionalCharacter · 07/08/2022 23:02

Yes, you can leave your assets to anyone you want. Yes he could challenge it, but he’d have to go to court. Definitely see a solicitor and explain your circumstances.

I will make an appointment with a solicitor for sure (I am actually a lawyer but wills & trusts was my most hated module 😆)

OP posts:
rosiebl · 07/08/2022 23:19

I would think you would be better divorcing now while your marriage is still considered 'short'? I thought in the eyes of the law, without children, a short marriage is dealt with financially as 'leave with what you came with' so your DH would get very little, if any of your solely owned assets if you divorce?

Dinoteeth · 07/08/2022 23:21

I think you should seek professional legal advice.

But I do agree with previous posters it probably makes sense for you to transfer ownership of the other house to your family ASAP.

However one thing you need to be careful of is any accusations of deprecating assets to avoid potental carehome fees.

As for him asking I think you probably need to be honest and say you want to give your siblings / neices / nephews a chance to get on the property ladder.

Soproudoflionesses · 07/08/2022 23:24

Can you sign your house over to them now?

Iizzyb · 07/08/2022 23:30

Usually death in service benefits don't pass under the will - you complete a form to nominate a recipient. You could nominate someone other than dh. You might also want to explain why you're nominating them. My understanding is dh could challenge this but if he's getting other assets the trustees of the scheme may well still pay to your nominated person

Original poster
Whichwhatnow · 07/08/2022 23:34

I can't transfer the house over now - partly because DH would realise, and partly because my siblings wouldn't be able to get a mortgage to cover the amount outstanding (self employed and poor credit etc).

I don't want to divorce - I do love my DH and going through that stress right now is the last things I need, but equally I don't see why he should end up with well over half a mil just due to the fact he's married me. Like I said, he has his own place and has family to rely on financially (which he did before meeting me).

Time to look into solicitor appointments I think!

OP posts:
Original poster
Whichwhatnow · 07/08/2022 23:35

*thing

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