Free counselling after domestic abuse - does it exist?

[Bemyclementine]

In the process of divorcing my controlling, manipulative, gaslighting, coercive husband . We do have DC so no choice but to have some contact. He harasses me, gaslights veiled threats. I need help with thus but have no money.

Have you been in touch with Women's Aid ?

I haven't. I suppose that's the obvious place to start really. I think its clear that I'm still in a bit of denial about it all as it really hadn't occurred to me to contact them

GP
Online self referral (google nhs counselling)
Freedom programme

Some branches of Women’s Aid have counsellors who specialise in domestic abuse, in addition to the emotional and practical support that can be provided via the women’s workers, so definitely worth getting in touch with your local branch. They should also be able to advise about support available for arranging contact with children. Many branches also have children’s workers.

To access general counselling, you could ask your GP if they have a practice based counsellor or if there is an NHS counselling service you could be referred to, or if there are options for free counselling via charities in your local area (counselling often provided via third sector agencies and can be accessed via self-referral for free or with a donation to the charity).

Available services depends on where you are based. For example, in Scotland relationship counselling organisation The Spark have a relationship helpline where people can access a free 1-1 one off relationship focused discussion with a relationship counsellor. They were actually offering free counselling focusing on relational issues (not necessarily ‘couple counselling’ which is not advised in situations of domestic abuse) during the Covid-19 pandemic, but I think they may have come to an end.
I believe some areas in England have Refuge for domestic abuse support, in addition to Women’s Aid. Your local branch of Victim Support may also be an option for counselling.

I hope things start to improve for you.

I'm speaking to the GP again today so will ask her. I can self refer to the Wellbeing service but past experience has meant I haven't done yet. It doesn't seem to provide what I want/need.

Please get in touch with Woman’s Aid. I felt a bit silly contacting them as my EX wasn’t physically violent but they have been amazing. I am working through the Freedom program. I have fortnightly sessions with my Woman’s Aid worker and she has given me so much strength to not put up with my EX bullahit re the kids. I would also recommend getting in touch with a mediation service. We didn’t actually manage to achieve anything via mediation but it helped to validate my feelings that what he was asking & the way he was acting wasn’t reasonable or respectful. It’s been a process for me but I feel like I am getting there.

Try and check with your local Council. Some have services that offer support.

Specialist DA counselling is what you need. Contact women's aid or your local women's centre/children's Centre. I work in this field.

Thank you all. I've been OK fir ages (through long seperation) but I realise I've just shut myself off and he's just been biding hus time. Now I'm divorcing him, he's started up again and although I knew it would be hard, I thought I was in a strong enough place to deal with it.

@Kaffiene it's really helpful to know that it's helping you. Hopefully I'll find the same