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What do you regret about not doing in your 20's and would change?

128 replies

Trainermat · 30/07/2022 17:21

Title says it all. I'm 20 and looking for some pointers! Feeling very lost atm.

OP posts:
beststepforward · 31/07/2022 00:14

Enjoyed more holidays

Saved money rather than blowing it with nothing to show for it

Prioritised exercise especially building my core before getting pregnant

Tried a variety of things to discover hobbies

Whatdidijustsee · 31/07/2022 00:15

I settled down young and like some others, I wish I experienced more sex with different men.

theniceunderstandingone · 31/07/2022 00:15

I wish I was better with my money and took my son on holiday.

Now I have three kids, am completely broke and I don't think I will ever get to take them on holiday 😤

AllLopsided · 31/07/2022 00:20

I wish I'd worked harder to be fitter. I lived in London so walked a fair amount but wish I'd actively worked on my core strength. I had a bad back by 28. I have serious mobility problems now in my 50s (including other things due to accidents).

I wish I'd managed money better. Again, I lived in London on a low wage but I was overdrawn every month which started a spiral of debt.

slightlysnippy · 31/07/2022 00:35

I regret nothing major. I had so much fun in my twenties. Had good friends, we had lots of brilliant times, fab nights/days out, lots of memorable festivals. Although I did get a degree that allowed me to start a good career, so current plan is to retire at 55 (I'm 48)

So advice have fun!

slightlysnippy · 31/07/2022 00:37

merryhouse · 30/07/2022 21:27

Weights, and stretching. I cannot stress this enough.

Singing lessons.

My niche hobby (I neglected it for 15 years. I think I could have been at the top of the middle-range by now, certainly much better than I currently am).

All the domestic-goddess stuff that I've spent years half-arsing Grin

You regret in your twenties not doing weights and stretching?? Shock

GriseldaPlum · 31/07/2022 00:50

I settled down young and like some others, I wish I experienced more sex with different men

I married at 19, divorced at 26, then married again at 28. So consequently have only had sex with two men. Ever.

My biggest regret is not keeping up a pension when I became a sahm at 30.

Stuffed now I'm a waspie.

stayinghometoday · 31/07/2022 00:51

MsPincher · 30/07/2022 22:02

Boring one - buying a house. I thought they were expensive and prices would come down. The opposite happened.

Lots of people think that even today. They never learn.

GriseldaPlum · 31/07/2022 00:53

Stuffed now I'm a waspie

Correction. WASPI

stayinghometoday · 31/07/2022 00:54

Get into a routine that is good for you regarding exercise, a bit of saving, a bit of travelling (work abroad a bit maybe), a bit of partying but also follow some of your ambition. Study if you still have to do that. Don't give this stuff up for a romantic partner until you're late twenties. Do your thing for a while.

QueSyrahSyrah · 31/07/2022 00:59

I wish I'd saved more money.

Other than that no regrets, I travelled, made great friends, had a lot of great sex, had some bad sex, got my heart broken, broke a heart or two.

Veryverysadandold · 31/07/2022 01:25

Threesome

blueshoes · 31/07/2022 01:32

Got a nose job
Left my first and second job earlier

Beansycheese · 31/07/2022 01:35

I wish I had spent less time shagging men for validation and more time building a career.

TartanGirl1 · 31/07/2022 01:50

Saved money and exercised. I really really enjoyed my 20s 😝

Diamond7272 · 31/07/2022 01:52

I wish i had never gone into teaching as a career. I wanted to tick the 'professional' box so as to ease my anxious parents who were relatively poor and saw that kind of job as a safety net.

20 yrs later i am mid 40s, my teaching career is over due to utter exhaustion and burnout, ptsd-esque symptoms, and complete disdain for the hamster wheel ( i feel so sorry for children these days, all the stupid hoops they have to jump through, silly grades/numbers that employers care little about), and I feel like i am starting all over again in terms of new career, home, friendship group etc.

Seeing how poor many young teachers are today, especially regarding student debt and accommodation (rent), it would be a disastrous decision now - you dont get those good earning years back, and if you think there's longevity in education these days, £40,000+ salaries year after year, FORGET IT.

I helped so many others... But didnt help myself at all. By the time I realised, my 30s had also gone....

Celia24 · 31/07/2022 01:59

Possibly not taking red flags more seriously in some of the men I dated. But you live and learn.

I spent most of my 20s living abroad (now 30) and I wouldn't change it. It does mean I'm a bit less settled in some ways but I only bought a property recently and don't feel I should've done it sooner. I was having too much fun in the sun

I'd say keep up the friendships that are important to you. I have some great friends from childhood Im still close with today and the 20s were formative years for that. Others fell away over the years and I miss them sometimes.

Cherish your grandparents and older relatives. They are gone far sooner than you think and you miss them always.

Celia24 · 31/07/2022 02:05

Ironically @Diamond7272 I worry about regretting not going into teaching. I got a CELTA and taught at some good schools abroad. I loved it and was good at it, warts and all.

When I came back to UK I shadowed an old teacher who warned me against going into profession saying it wasn't what it was, explaining how admin heavy etc. My parents tried to pressure me into the career and honestly I do really miss it sometimes. But my job now pays well, is flexible and not too draining. Sounds like you went through a lot. But yeah OP - in your 20s you might try different possible vocations and it can be hard to choose.

TurquoisePterodactyl · 31/07/2022 02:06

Moving to another country.

GrowlingManchego · 31/07/2022 02:06

Travelled more. Realised I was gorgeous back then. Dated nicer men.

PurpleSky300 · 31/07/2022 02:21

Honestly, I'm reading this at 30 and thinking I didn't enjoy that much of my 20s compared to other posters, I always struggled with confidence and have never been much of a party animal. Maybe I should do all my , travelling, partying and shagging around in my 30s!

TurquoisePterodactyl · 31/07/2022 04:00

PurpleSky300 · 31/07/2022 02:21

Honestly, I'm reading this at 30 and thinking I didn't enjoy that much of my 20s compared to other posters, I always struggled with confidence and have never been much of a party animal. Maybe I should do all my , travelling, partying and shagging around in my 30s!

Yes, you absolutely should.

bigTillyMint · 31/07/2022 04:15

No regrets here - I lived my best life!

Went to uni and partied hard, plus qualified to do the career I’d always wanted and still love 35 years on.
Moved to London and still partied.
Played the field, had a few bad boys, settled down with one - knew we were really a bad match long term, which made me realise what I should be looking for.
Made loads of friends.
Travelled.
Bought a flat (regret selling it and not renting it out, but that was in my 30s!)
Was ready to settle down in my 30s.

bigTillyMint · 31/07/2022 04:15

No regrets here - I lived my best life!

Went to uni and partied hard, plus qualified to do the career I’d always wanted and still love 35 years on.
Moved to London and still partied.
Played the field, had a few bad boys, settled down with one - knew we were really a bad match long term, which made me realise what I should be looking for.
Made loads of friends.
Travelled.
Bought a flat (regret selling it and not renting it out, but that was in my 30s!)
Was ready to settle down in my 30s.

bigTillyMint · 31/07/2022 04:16

No regrets here - I lived my best life!

Went to uni and partied hard, plus qualified to do the career I’d always wanted and still love 35 years on.
Moved to London and still partied.
Played the field, had a few bad boys, settled down with one - knew we were really a bad match long term, which made me realise what I should be looking for.
Made loads of friends.
Travelled.
Bought a flat (regret selling it and not renting it out, but that was in my 30s!)
Was ready to settle down in my 30s.