Jobs for bridal party - ushers, bridesmaids

[purplechaos]

When you got married, or if you've been a bridesmaid/usher before, was there much for the bridal party to do? DH is an usher at a wedding in a few weeks' time and has just received a very detailed schedule for the day starting in the morning and going through to around 1am (or whenever he can guarantee everyone is safely on their way home). It's starting to make me think we didn't take our wedding seriously enough 😅

No judgement - just interested. At our wedding the ushers and bridesmaids were brilliant in terms of checking in on us, making sure messages got around (e.g. cake's been dished up) but it was more ad hoc. I imagine it might need to be a bit more formal if you have more moving parts?

I’ve been a bridesmaid at a very, ahem, involved wedding and it was exhausting. I’ve also been a bridesmaid at a very relaxed wedding and while it was nice, it was a bit of a shit show cos the ushers didn’t have any formal jobs either so didn’t do a great job of ushering people anywhere.

The best weddings are the ones somewhere in between, decent ushers really make the whole day flow much better and are definitely needed when guests are absent mindedly strolling with little purpose and actually, they’re needed to get to the dinner table / confetti archway thing / group photo etc.

Bit of a piss take to expect them to be on duty until 1am though, sounds like the B&G need a wedding organiser!

That sounds a bit much!

My bridesmaids got ready with me and helped me with my dress in the toilet. Best man looked after the rings. No timetabled duties!

Ushers: Show people to seats, ush them for photos and in to the meal. Job done.
Bridesmaids: Help bride stay calm, Walk up aisle, help bride with dress. Job done.

Ok that all sounds a lot more like the weddings we've experienced so far! I think I'm going to need to make some friends and bring snacks. Already looking forward to a huge leisurely breakfast somewhere nearby whilst he does his morning duties 😁

Pretty much this ^^ except that my bridesmaid (my sister) just walked up the aisle behind me. There were no "duties". I didn't need help with my dress.

I don't understand why so much is expected of bridesmaids these days. What is there to do?

I'm curious about that too. When I got married, people helped us set up - more those who arrived first and wanted to than those who were specifically part of the wedding party. Then we had a few friends doing jobs as part of the wedding - godfather as Master of Ceremonies etc. No big schedule of duties though for anyone. It all flowed really smoothly, and by midnight everyone was dancing in their socks and pyjamas. Everyone who helped us, including spontaneous helpers, were sent gifts afterwards.

I'm bridesmaid at a wedding in September though and we're having to have meetings to run through our responsibilities. I think the thing that bugs me is that we're not getting any outfits either, so we don't even get the perk of a nice outfit for the day.

@thethecatsthecats, I am curious about what you are supposed to wear? Bridesmaids usually wear the same or coordinating dressed. Very odd if you all turn up dressed differently.

Bet she did bridesmaid proposal boxes too, far too exhausting.