How far can you safely drive in a day?

[WillitFit]

I'm a middle aged woman who's had a driving licence since I was 18yo. I drive short journeys most days and a journey of 120 mikes round trip most weeks and would say I'm an experienced, competent and confident driver.

However for longer trips, which tended to be as a family, I always let late DH drive. No real reason other than he enjoyed driving and I am lazy was happy to nap on journeys. I would take a shift on very long journeys.

Since he died, obviously, I have to do it all myself. I took DS2 for a uni tour yesterday, 3.5 hours each way. DH would have done it without thinking. I was really struggling and stopped for a rest every hour on the way back.

I did a 430 mile round trip on A roads last week, over 9 hours of driving with lunch halfway. I really struggled with the last hour, had to stop and refresh. I was good for nothing once I was finally home!

She did stop every hour.

I think it just depends on too many factors - weather, road type, experience, general health, what kind of car etc.

There's no right or wrong, just do whatever you feel comfortable with.

2 hours max each way.
I have always been a tired person. Not ill, just tired.

I tend to have a rule that if the journey is +4 hours each way I’ll stay in a hotel, so max 8 hours in a day.

I did a stupid 5 1/2 round trip yesterday to drop something to my ds, won't be happening again, caught in horrible traffic for over an hour on way home. I'll post it next time. Chill out day today.

I could easy do 5-6 hours without a stop and will drive 3 hours for a day out and then 3 hours back again the same day.

DP does a lot of driving for work (although all local, next town over at the furthest) and I work from home so until recently when we did a big trip I tended to do the driving.

Coming back from a wedding at the start of this year though my DP drove back (massive hangover on my part) and she really struggled with it. Bigger motorways, smart motorways, variable speed limits, unfamiliar areas, it's a lot to process if you're not used to it, so we've started splitting the driving on these trips so that she can get the practise.

My Nan had the same problem, my Grandad did all the motorway driving and when he died she didn't have the confidence so would take twice as long to get to places using A-roads.

With regards to your son, are you sure it's him you're worried about or is it that you're going to miss him. You'll have two less people in your home (obviously for very different reasons) and that has to be hard.

I decided on uni in my hometown as my Mum was diagnosed with cancer and the situation wasn't looking great. Luckily by the time it was actually time for me to go treatment had worked well (she was around for another 20 years) so I still left home to go live in halls.

I really needed that change. I had a great group of friends who'd been there for me over the past couple of years, but I needed to meet new people, to discover who I was as an adult. Even living in halls, that didn't really happen as much as it would have if I hadn't had that safety net to fall back on. Looking back, I really wish I'd been able to go further afield, even if only an hour or so away.

Firstly Im so sorry about your husband .You are feeling raw I expect .I think if your Son wants to go to Uni then its an important step for him. Emotionally its quite draining and I have my husband! As far as driving is concerned its so personal really .We know a couple who love driving to Spain! Others who baulk at going to the Garden Centre a few miles away! Whatever feels right for you .My Son was at Uni over 100 miles away .He was back at W/E a lot and all the holidays as well.

4 hours 1 way or 2.5 hr each way in a day

It depends on the person, DH can tow a caravan 300 miles in a day with stops, I struggle to do 50 miles but don't really like driving whereas he does

Yes, definitely DS I'm worried about. He's really struggled, in trouble at work, not applying himself to study (apprenticeship), refusing counselling, on medication. He thinks leaving the employer and a fresh start will help, I think without a complete change of attitude he'll have the same issues at University. Hopefully the fresh start will bring the change, but it's hard to know.

From my point of view, out of sight out of mind, might be helpful!

Actually just checked Google maps, and it was 7 1/2 hours round trip.

I regularly make a 4-hour drive which can easily become 5 with delays (and once, after a horrendous motorway closure, ended up as 8 😱). I’ve only once done the return trip in a day, and that was pushing it, imho.

I think it gets better as you get used to long drives but I still wouldn’t say I jump for joy at the thought, and I always break in the middle. Don’t have any qualms about not wanting to drive for hours. I’m very sorry to hear about your DH

I've done 6 hours to Cornwall when younger with one stop, now 3 hours is about all I can cope with.

That's fair enough, it does sound like he has his issues to work through.

He'd still have to work through them at home though, and a change of scene and a bit of space is just as likely to be helpful as it is a hinderance.

At the end of the day, you're still only a phone call, or whatsapp away. I had difficult conversations with my Mum and Dad by email from half a planet away that I'd have struggled with face to face. Distance can be helpful.

And at least now you know you can do the 3.5 hour drive to him if you need to.

I don’t enjoy driving, quite honestly 2 hours is plenty for me.
I did drive 180 miles to NW Wales for a 2 week holiday recently but I wouldn’t want to do that regularly.

I regularly do 4ish hours drives up the country one way, sometimes stop for a wee but don't need to stop for a rest.

When we dropped DD at uni it was 4 up, there for a couple of hours and then 5 down. That was tough

It depends on lots of factors but I'd say I'd find it easier to do a 6-7 hour one-way journey (with a couple of breaks for food / loo) than a 3.5 hour journey with a full day's activity and then the return trip home. I find driving in the afternoon / evening very tiring but I'm fine if I set off first thing.

I regularly do 4-4.5hours, sometimes in an evening after work and I'm used to that but any further and I start to think about splitting the journey. I did 3-3.5hours each way to a work meeting once and it was far too long a day so after that I used to stop over on the way there or back depending on what time the meeting was (the meetings also always ran over!).

My df drove Portsmouth to Glasgow with 1 quick coffee /loo break. He said of he didnt need loo he'd of carried on.
That was 15 years ago.

He regularly does 6 hrs on 1 hit and back that eve

As pp said, everyone is different and it's not an endurance test. It will have been hard for you too, with all the emotional stuff you're carrying at the moment. I also agree that it's much harder to do 3.5 hours there, a full-on day, then 3.5 hours back home than it is to do a 7hr drive.

When I lived near Brighton, I used to drive myself and 3 DCs to Central Scotland to visit family. Journey took 9 hours plus stoppage time. I'm not going to pretend it was pleasant, but we managed it two or three times a year for the seven years we lived down there.
There was no viable alternative - trains were prohibitively expensive, and the logistics around flying were too complicated with needing car seats/travel to Gatwick Airport/getting picked up from Edinburgh Airport.
Gladly, we have since moved to Yorkshire, so I can do the 3.5hr drive in one go.

I’ll happily do 800 miles in one day with the ferry/tunnel as a break. My record is 11hrs door to door.

I have driven 5 and a half hours to collect son from university, turned round and driven 5 and a half hours back, then the next day driven 3 and a half hours each way to collect older son from his university! It would have been more helpful if they could have gone to university near each other! But I enjoy driving and regularly drive long distances with few stops. Once I set off, I just like to get there!

I can do up to 4 ish hours in one go, or two trips of 3 hours in a day. I found uni open days exhausting though, and if the drive was clearly more than 3 hours, we always went the night before and stayed overnight.