5 yr DD pretending to smoke

[Boating123]

What would you say if your 5 year old daughter pretended to smoke a toy/thing?

Last time she did it I gave her a long lecture on the perils of smoking and how it is not cool, increases the risk of dying younger etc.

Today she found a little plastic candle (part of a plastic birthday cake set) and she pretended it was a cigarette. Today I just ignored it.

What should I say to her, if anything if she does it again?
She tends to like to do the opposite of what I say.

Neither myself or husband smoke. I just don't want her to think it's a cool thing to do.

Where on earth has she learned it from?

Distract or ignore.

My daughter used to do this because she'd seen other people do it. This was nearly 40 years ago so there were more smokers around. I didn't smoke and she never has done. By all means tell her about the dangers of smoking but don't worry too much she is just mimicking what she's seen.

At 5? I would probably ignore it, she's just copying something she has seen, maybe on tv or people vaping on the street.

I don't think it means anything in relation to her future attitudes to smoking, even if she does think its 'cool'.
When I was 5 I thought feather boas were the coolest thing ever and had a magicians wand I pretended was a long cigarette like cruella deville smoked in 101 dalmations.
I did not grow up to think long cigarettes or feather boas were remotely cool.

She’s just pretending. When I was a kid sweet cigarettes were a thing. I have never smoked despite this (and my parents both smoking). I wouldn’t worry about it.

People in the street/outside pubs/in the park...lots of places I expect.

OP, I wouldn't say any more if she does it again. Perhaps just make a 'Yuck' sound and then turn away and give her no attention until she stops.

When I was a kid we "smoked" candy cigarettes constantly
We just thought we were cool
I didn't smoke as an adult
She's just playing - I'd ignore it's just a phase xxx

I would just ignore it. It's not nice to see her do it but she's probably doing it now to be rebellious. She knows you don't like it so she's doing it. Just ignore and hopefully she'll stop. Or maybe try the 'look'. You know the disapproving eyebrows?

Can you remember those white candy sticks? Not sure whether you can still buy them but children used to pretend to smoke these when I was a child.

Thanks everyone.

Do? I’d do nothing beyond what you’ve done which is tell her it’s dangerous to actually smoke in real life.

I grew up with those fake cigarettes that were sweets and pretended to smoke often. Never smoked IRL

Age 5 I also pretended to
Jump out of a plane
Deep sea dive in a submarine
Tame lions for the circus

So basically, so long as it’s pretend, don’t fret. Playing pretend at dangerous things doesn’t mean you will grow up to do it.

Me and my cousins used to do this when we were younger. You could by like stick white sweets in a box and we would pretend they were cigarettes we even made some out of paper once god nos. I can say we didn't end up smokers. I think your daughter will learn more about as she grows up not at 5.

She's only 5 - and if she likes the opposite of whatever you think: no problem!

I was actually 15 when my very hippie and genuinely well-meaning dad took me aside and said ... and I quote:

"Look, pumpkin, I know that experimenting is normal at your age, and trust you me, I know a teen on weed when I see one - I used to be one! But if you ever feel you want to try something a tad more serious: promise you'll come to me and that you won't buy off some arse who'll sell you stuff that may kill you. I'll get you sorted out with something that won't!"

... and that was how I decided that hard drugs were terminally uncool. No, my father wasn't a psychological genius - he was being quite earnest! He just very successfully and equally as accidentally applied reverse psychology.

Try and work out where she has learnt it, and remove the influence. Has she been watching any older films lately (80/early 90 or befo)? They often have characters smoking

This was a standard role play activity when I was a child in the 60s and I spent many a happy playtime, puffing away on a pencil, or a lolly stick. I can reassure you that I’ve never smoked in my life, so don’t fret! 🤣

Well my child did it a few times. Not that it was a regular thing or anything.
No one around her smokes but they obviously see people in general life doing it.
I think I laughed! It doesn't mean she wanted to smoke or anything like that

What if she just sees it walking down the road, on the school run etc?

It possibly depends on how diverse your area is, but here there are a lot of Eastern Europeans and they have the highest amount of smokers in the world apparently. Either way, a lot of them smoke.

Yeah, as others have said, I wouldn’t give it much thought. I remember ‘smoking’ sweetie cigarettes and I’ve never touched a real cigarette.

My youngest did this a few times. I just ignored it and he stopped. Nobody in our family smokes but people in wider society do and they role play things they see.

I remember having a pretend cigarette that used to puff out white powder like smoke! We got it from the joke shop (but I am 40!) Although I wouldn't buy one now I don't think it encouraged me to smoke. My parents were healthy, anti smokers which was the biggest motivation for me not to smoke.

I also had a joke cigarette with a burn mark around it. No idea why I liked the cigarettes from the joke shop or why my parents let me buy them