Holiday advice, travelling with ds with asd

[EnglishRose1320]

So after many rocky years, with significant mental health problems alongside the difficulties my ds faces day to day, we finally as a family feel we are in a place where a holiday abroad is an option. Ds is 17, it's taken a while!

Any tips for making the experience go smoothly. We've booked a week in October, so not too hot. Flying to Italy, so not too far. Have to fly with EasyJet, only option, so not sure how they are but will have to cope.

I feel a strange mix of excitement, pleased we are at this point and overwhelming anxiety that it will all go wrong.

Also does anyone know if its possible to get an extra baggage allowance for things related to sensory issues and eating issues?

I don't know if this is of any help
www.easyjet.com/en/help/boarding-and-flying/hidden-disabilities

I would say you know your ds best and what works for him so go with that as much as possible. You haven't said exactly what your ds struggles with so it's tricky to advise really as it's different for everyone. Headphones for the entire flight perhaps, music or audio books whatever he finds calming. Prepare him for what to expect when you're there, show him pictures of everything. Keep things in a similar routine if that helps - meals at same times, bed at usual time - talk about what you will do and what you plan to do while there - write a plan if that helps. Have lots of down time where he can just be in the room and do whatever he likes to do at home, read/watch stuff on a kindle/play on phone or whatever. My ds is 16 and has Aspergers and we tend to take him out in the morning and then leave him in the room while we go out in the afternoon. Check for nearest supermarkets to where you're staying (if poss) so you can buy the food he'll eat.

Italy is wonderful, where are you going?

We have always travelled with dd who has autism - she was diagnosed young at 2 so it's all we have known but I was determined not to stop living the life we wanted. Luckily or as a consequence, hard to say, she travels fine - headphones are your friend and she loves her mask too (she's an adult now and flies alone too). She loves routine so going to breakfast in the buffet at 9am was what we did, then went out sightseeing, back for a swim late afternoon, shower then off out for dinner, she's very picky but will eat bread type meals eg pizza, wraps, chapatti, or pasta and tomato sauce which meant me trying to persuade French restaurants to let her have the kids menu at 17 (they always seem to offer vegetarian pasta for kids, she's vegetarian!) puzzle books are essential, she has a subscription to 2 different ones now.

She's a real history buff so anything with facts especially numerical ones were a hit even at 5, plus she's always loved classical music so I'd find concerts etc. you have to think about their interests then it tends to be ok - yes I did get looks taking a 6 year old to the opera but she loved it and the people around us were amazed at the interval that she fully understood what was going on.

Each person with asd is different but top tip is headphones and the airports often have online resources to walk through the airport ahead of time, also put on those airport programmes so he gets an idea maybe? You can buy pretty much anything in Italian supermarkets, I wouldn't worry about eating too much, take enough for the journey and first full day perhaps. You can book additional cases

Just book and pay for extra checked bags

Sorry don't think I explained myself well with the extra baggage, happy to pay for a suitcase in the hold but can't pay loads extra and his will have his weighted blanket in it. Also unsure where to look to find out what food I can pack in the hold.

Am obviously doing some research myself and trying to find out these answers, just totally rusty when it comes to travel.

@gogohmm, we use to travel with ds when he was younger, not far due to costs, but Wales, Scotland, Holland etc... and I think if that had carried on, things would be easier now. Unfortunately he had a breakdown when he transitioned to secondary school, resulting in an attempt on his life and a short stay in hospital under section. It took several years to slowly recover from that. Just as he was ready and we started looking into travel again, the pandemic hit, which obviously ruled out travel for a while and set him back in his recovery.

Ds isn't a morning person so my plan is to let him chill in the mornings, whilst I take our younger ds out to enjoy things like the pool/tennis etc.... then plan family activities for the afternoons. We have a lodge so can cook our own meals, which will hopefully help.

@Staynow thanks for all the tips, we are going to Lake Garda. One thing I'm finding confusing about Italy, is when you look at days out, they have different levels of disability discount but I can't see any explanations to work out where my ds sits. We don't need the discount, but will need help with queuing if possible, so I'm trying to work out how to find that information out.

I use to be so confident about meeting his needs, still engaging in the world and not missing out on opportunities for him or us as a family. Since his section though, everything feels very overwhelming and I'm trying my hardest not to let my fears hold him back.

I just feel like I have so much extra to manage now. Things I know I need to find out before we go.

How easy is it to navigate Gatwick, is it easy to book their sensory space?
How easy is it to take his medication? They say it needs to be in original packaging, but his liquid medication will be over the size allowed for liquids.
How much should we plan in advance? How much should we just wait and see?
Will he eat anything other than his safe foods? Will any of them be available? (Currently under investigation for an eating disorder as well)
How to balance the needs of both children, when they are so different?
What will the Internet be like? (Needs it to regulate)

Don't worry I'm not expecting answers on here to these questions, just showing you, the anxious ramblings of mine.

Some airlines like Tui will give you extra baggage allowance. Worth asking. We are flying to Ibiza in June next year with Ds aged 10 who has autism and they’ve given us an extra 30kg baggage for medical supplies / extra clothes etc free of charge and they’ve also give us free private transfers to and from the resort (I had to send a copy of our blue badges).

@Afterfire Thanks, will ask EasyJet if they do the same. Hadn't even considered the extra clothes, but the time of year we are going you get all sorts of weather and he will only wear clothes if they feel exactly right, so I'm probably going to need to pack extra!

Can't address all your queries, OP, but regarding taking food with you - since Brexit you're not allowed to import certain foods into the EU, so do research that beforehand!!

If he likes pasta then you're good to go in Italy 😋

@Regenbogen22 , luckily he does like pasta, but only with cheddar on it- not sure how easily that will be to find. It might be a week of plain pasta for him!

Having looked at the restrictions, I think I'll be able to bring his baked beans and dried fruit bars- but I won't be able to bring anything that has diary or meat in the ingredients.

He won't starve by any means and if he is relaxed may even try some new foods. Just want a few safe options so we know he will eat something!

Does anyone know how train travel works in Italy? Trying to navigate the websites, trying to see if they have a disabled pass? Etc..... again, don't mind if they don't, just trying to work it all out before we go.