No parents on school grounds for Years 4 and above

[MakeItEasier]

DD is 8, about to start Year 4 and been told today no parents in the ground sunless the child has an EHCP for years 4 and above – if there is a child in a younger year then a parent can grab the older child.

DD doesn’t have an EHCP as we’re awaiting it. I’ve spoken to the HT about the rule but she says until the EHCP is granted she can’t make an exception. I only have DD. No other DCs and I don’t have any family with DC at the school either.

My DD is suspected dyslexic and dyspraxic/DCD, she also has severe hypermobility. She falls over thin air, and is very unbalanced. She still holds my hand walking to and from school. She also has processing and memory issues, she’s prone to forgetting things 2 seconds after she’s told it, and school hand all letters directly to me as DD has a habit of putting them down and forgetting where they are.

Years 2 and 3 are left on the playground but go to their classrooms round the corner alone, so she is used to leaving me and going in herself.

I’m more worried about pickup, I won’t be able to wait right outside the gates as the path is really thin and it already creates a bottle neck as there’s a Nursery opposite and parents wait for their preschoolers on that part as well.

I’m going to have to wait at the end of the road the schools, there’s a little park there, and it’s about 200m from the gate. We then live a half mile further away (0.7m total from school gates).

So any tips on preparing DD for this?

I would put your concerns in writing to the school and make a formal request that there is an exception as it's clear she has a disability and she is awaiting her ECHP and also what is their risk assessment for a child with your DD needs. Let them out in writing that they are refusing and then you can go to the governors/follow the complaints procedure.

You can include that you are willing to work towards DD achieving this but you have genuine safety concerns due to her disabilities and there isn't a way to work on this over the school holidays.

Unfortunately you will often have to be "that parent" for your DD especially if the medics are never able to give her a definitive diagnosis. Very frustrating for you and her

Some HTs just make it up as they go along.

I think it’s off that disabled children will be singled out as the only ones having parents in the playground.

very othering.

Exactly this.

I think people are too scared of authority...they're only primary school teachers.

Just go. Shes your child. School is massively over stepping. What are they going to do? Call the police?

Theres no denying that it is parents who do make pick ups and drop offs dangerous and difficult. But there are other solutions than banning children with difficulties from getting picked up.. For instance it only takes 1 parent. Aunt maud and the neighbours dog don't need to be there. Older siblings getting off the school bus can meet their parents elelsewhere. School could instead insist only 1 parent/carer ve present. That cuts the number instantly.

DD doesn’t have an EHCP as we’re awaiting it. I’ve spoken to the HT about the rule but she says until the EHCP is granted she can’t make an exception.

She’s talking out of her arse though. It’s not the law. It’s an arbitrary rule she made up and of course she has the discretion to make exceptions. The school does sound a bit daft. I guess they don’t have that many children with needs? Our school has loads, many still waiting on EHCPs - we don’t need a piece of paper to tell us someone needs support when we can clearly see that for ourselves (otherwise we wouldn’t refer them for an EHCP in the first place.)

Teacher needs to be reminded the equality act 2010 and reasonable adjustments should to be considered for people with disabilities.
There is no need for an EHCp for this and they can't just say no or have blanket policies.
You haven't actually said what the issue with your daughter coming out of school alone is but if there is one then the head should work with you on this.
I think they would find it very hard to argue you going into the play ground is not something they can reasonably do if you do need to pick her up.
I would ask for them to put it in writing that they can't allow you to pick her up, don't take no for an answer just keep repeating, can you send me this in an email why you can't adjust... they won't
Then when you get home email and say further to our conversation you stated that you can not allow any child to be picked up without and EHCP even one who is waiting on one and there are no exceptions to this.
Then at the end of the email I sign off Saying if this is not an accurate reflection of our meeting at x on y please contact me via email with any corrections.

They bloody hate that, they will ring and you just say I am writing this down and will email it to you can as I am keeping a paper trial.

Another trick schools do is tell you they can't reasonably adjust it because "everyone will think they are a special case" at this point you say that is not a valid reason to not adjust for a child with special needs and I would consider it to be discriminatory that you put the inconvenience of saying no to other parents above the actual needs of a child in your care and it is another example of how you cannot meet her needs. I would also start copying your case worker into each and every email you send to maintain the paper trail and also make sure you get it written into the EHCp that she needs to be supervised off the school play ground.

Having said all this do send her to school and trial different Scenarios to see if she can do it because sometimes we can underestimate our children.
With my two I walked all round the school and discovered a walk which was well used by parents, didn't involve crossing a road and was on a street not choked up by parents cars which actually made life easier for us as we where not fighting for a parking space, or waiting on queues of traffic. The sense of achievement it gave them was enormous and we have worked on it so they can now cross the road and go to our local village shop independently, this is all the progress we have made between 9 and 17 but it is progress and it is some small independence.

Only you know your child but if you really feel
She is not capable and they are being "that school" you have to become "that parent" unfortunately.

Ps just seen you said later what the issue is

If school letters are the main worry I would ask that they be emailed directly to you instead of handed to your daughter, my daughter's school does this to save on paper. If the mobility issues (apologies if this not the right phrase) are your main worry, just inform the school that you will be collecting as usual, as leaving her to walk alone presents a health and safety risk for her.

Our juniors lets the children out from year 3. There's two exits from the school grounds and no teacher on either gate. When my oldest started no parents were allowed into the grounds, although they relaxed that very shortly after she arrived, but parents didn't tend to wait outside classrooms even then.

What I did with mine was gradually went further out. So they did let year 3 parents in the first week. So that week I stood by the classroom. Next week I waited by the gate, then after that I waited up the road. There were always plenty of other children going the same direction.
And actually she found it quite exciting after the initial thought of "I want you there, mummy."

You may find that she rises to the challenge, and you may well also find that if none of the others have parents there, that she doesn't want you either.

Gosh - you still have to hand your child over to a teacher and pick up within sight of a teacher up to Y6 in our school. In fact they put a fence and a second gate in to separate it from the secondary part (there's already a large fence and gate to the whole school, and now a fence and gate to the junior side), both manned by a teacher at drop off and pick up times. This was a direct result of safe guarding as detailed in the last Ofsted report - they said the first fence and gate wasn't safe enough.

What happens when a parent is late or isn’t there to pick up?
In our school only y5 and 6 are allowed to walk out alone and even then it’s only with written permission from parents.

read the full post, child is unstable due to disability and has regular falls if hand not held, also memory issues

I would raise a safeguarding concern to the LEA/Council or Ofsted. I don't think it is acceptable to let primary children wander out of school when you can't see who is collecting them.

In our school older DC can walk home alone with prior instruction from the parent/guardian, but not the other way round.

Could you also ask that school do a risk assessment specifically for your DD, given her mobility issues?

"DD doesn’t have an EHCP as we’re awaiting it. I’ve spoken to the HT about the rule but she says until the EHCP is granted she can’t make an exception."

She is talking bollocks. The law says reasonable adjustments must be made ( "and blanket policies are unlawful") Having an ehcp or not is irrelevant. Put your request for the reasonable adjustment in writing in and if she still refuses, escalate.

Another one who wants to reiterate having an EHCP is completely irrelevant. Many schools seem to use the fact of an EHCP like this and it’s just wrong. The law in this area relates to the actual disabilities an individual has - EHCP relates to the support required in school. They are two separate things.

As other posters said she has the legal right to reasonable adjustments.

Id also write in and mention the Equality Act. If this doesn’t work and you want to escalate it IPSEA are very good at helping with legal advice etc.

Also if the school try to claim others will be upset/special case etc that is completely irrelevant and not your issue, it’s for the school to deal with.

My DD's walked home from year 4 about 10 mins away, crossing with the patrol man. Year 4 isn't a baby. My dd is autistic but shown a route and given rules she was more reliable than her sister who has dyslexia and gets distracted. By the time dd2 was year 3 they walked together home )until year 2 they finished at different times different sites slightly

Does she have any friend? They're all going to have to walk to a certain point, so something they could do together.

If not, have a word with other parents in her class, explain you're concerns and where you'll be, and ask them to let someone know if DD needs help Children are very good at looking out for each other and can let you know or go back into school they think DD has a problem.

If not, have a word with other parents in her class, explain you're concerns and where you'll be, and ask them to let someone know if DD needs help Children are very good at looking out for each other and can let you know or go back into school they think DD has a problem

But its not the kids responsibility to do this. They should not be Made to bail put adults who made a discriminatory and dangerous decision. And what happens when the kids take on this responsibility. When there are no incidents or issues the head will declare it a success and keep the rule. Except it only worked because 8 and 9 years olds stepped in akd safeguarded a child when adults felt it unnecessary.

Mention the Equality Act requirements, and also meanwhile pursue getting the EHCP.

I would expect a letter from a solicitor would get the Head Teacher to back down, very sad if that was required.

As for concern about going to and collecting children from school, ask the Head what action the school proposes to reduce the danger from parents who bring their children in Chelsea Tractors, no doubt some under the influence of drink or drugs.

Not all DC with disabilities have the same needs. Just because your DC could manage it doesn’t mean OP’s DC can.

"Year 4 isn't a baby. My dd is autistic but shown a route and given rules she was more reliable than her sister who has dyslexia and gets distracted."

Someone requiring reasonable adjustments is not a baby. Reasonable adjustments are reasonable adjustments for the individual so what your daughter can or cannot do is irrelevant.

Agree there is absolutely no way my asd child age 12 would be able to walk home from school alone safely if he was at a school within walking distance.