Posting here cos I have nobody to talk to and feel absolutely rubbish.
I'm a single mum to a 7yo, his dad lives abroad. My family have declared themselves too old to help out. I do everything for my son and love him to bits.
My life is shit though. I work part time in a bitchy workplace, I'm one of the oldest in a very young organisation. Colleagues live young sociable lives and have zero interest in a middle aged mum who comes in for part of the week. I feel invisible and undervalued. I regularly cry at night about work but feel trapped cos the hours allow me to do the school run and anything I see would mean a pay drop that I can't afford.
I have no social life. My friends don't have kids and I struggle to get childcare. These two facts have made maintaining friendships hard. My lifelong friends are lovely and still there to message etc, but I maybe see them once or twice a year. I'm not getting any adult interaction or time to feel like a likeable human being.
If I do get motivated to get out and about my son is completely awkward about it. He doesn't want to leave the house. I have to nag him at every step. It makes me upset, I'm trying to have nice days and it's so forced and hard work. There's no joy in doing things.
I'm just worn down by it all. I dread weekends, yet I hate the working week. The prospect of the 6 week holidays is totally depressing. I feel like I'm failing my son as he doesn't get interaction because I don't have any social network.
I'm lonely and it's sucking the life out of me.
Thanks for attending my pity party 🥳