Boys school won't allow hair tied back

[GnomeyGnome]

My son goes to an all boys secondary school. He has shoulder length hair that he has always worn down. With the heat this week he's been tying his hair back in a loose bun. At school he was told he had to take his hairband out as it's against uniform policy. I've just read the policy and it does say hair cuts must be of a uniform and moderate length, top knots and ponytails are not permitted.

Is this usual? Seems crazy to me. My son's hair looks so much neater tied back, plus it keeps him cooler. Surely it's safer as well during things like science lessons with Bunsen burners etc!

Does anyone else's child go to a school with a policy like this? I did wonder whether to bring it up with the school but as I said, he usually always wears it down so this isn't a massive issue for him it just seems odd to me!

This is so nuts though. Why?

Because they also say it should be moderate length, which implies that it should not be long enough to be tied back.

Well if anybody tried to dictate to my child how long their hair can be they'd be told to do one.

I support the school with full uniform, clean smart appearance, no makeup, no rainbow hair and foot tall Mohican.

I don't support anybody telling them how long they can have their hair or whether they can tie it back with a bobble.

The OO’s school makes no distinction between boys and girls either, it’s the same policy for all.

OP, could you not get it cut short if he’s uncomfortable?

Well if anybody tried to dictate to my child how long their hair can be they'd be told to do one.

Then they put them in isolation or exclude them. I suppose you would have to prioritise hair length rules when you were listing the secondary schools you wanted your dc to attend if it's really important to you.

Does it? DS could tie his hair back when it was quite short, above the shoulder. I'd say his hair is a moderate length now at shoulder length. Long hair is when it is down your back.

Both of our local secondary schools say boys' hair must be short and neat with no extreme or long styling.

Since your school has a similar policy, do you think they're being lenient by not asking him to cut it, but a bun or ponytail is a step too far.

I guess you can challenge it but it sounds like you chose the school and agree with their other rules and policies, may even have chose it for some of its rules and policies, so it's a bit rich to grumble about the one that now impacts your son.

How ridiculous. Why can't boys have long hair? No girls' school would ever insist on hair of 'moderate' length. What they do insist on is that you tie it back!

Fortunately where I live schools prioritise being sensibly dressed, smart and clean over picking on kids for wanting their hair a little longer.

They let kids keep some of their individuality while asking them to adhere to the uniform policy.

I wouldn't encourage my kids to go to a school where they were so arsed about hair length.

You have to love the entitlement of some mothers on this place sometimes.

Where are you asserting that this right comes from? Where does he get the right from to attend a school with clear rules and then not obey them?

For those who asked, I have no idea why the local boys schools won't let them have hair past collar length. Probably for the same archaic reasons other schools specify no "extreme hairstyles" or even "non-natural" colours. None of them have any bearing on receiving an education. I think all of the rules are as bad as each other.

Is this a private school?
Selective grammar?
Just send him to the local comprehensive.

You have to love the entitlement of some mothers on this place sometimes.

Where are you asserting that this right comes from? Where does he get the right from to attend a school with clear rules and then not obey them?

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It's not being entitled to want to have your hair at a length you are comfortable with.

It's his hair.

Schools ought to concentrate on teaching children not piss arsing about picking on them because they want a pony tail. Which isn't a problem for a girl to have.

Yes, some schools in bad areas just have to do what they can, and pick their battles.

Sounds a 'moderate length' to me. I'd go with some other form of tying it up thats not a pony tail or a bun. Personally I think plaits... (either 1 of 2). School still might not like it but he could legitimately say they're not forbidden, and are a sensible choice given the heat.

Come on, you asserted a right. Admit it, you just made it up didn’t you, no such right exists.

My thoughts exactly.

The number of anti-Sikh schools is very worrying.

Very interesting policy.

Schools often have a rule that girls hair below the shoulders should be tied back - and if not all the time for science, cooking and PE at least.

I'd check what the girls policy is - if it's different I'd absolutely challenge it even more.

But as it is that's just ridiculous. Who gives a shit about tied back hair.

And also it surely must discriminate against those who wear buns for religious purposes?

Oh just read it all boys (not sure how I missed that 🤦‍♀️)

I'd check what the girls policy is - if it's different I'd absolutely challenge it even more.
It's a boys school. Though if it's a state school I'd be questioning it if it was different to neighbouring co-ed schools.

Why would you challenge a rule that because it's different for boys and girls? Sex is a protected characteristic.

I don't understand what you meaning?

www.citizensadvice.org.uk/law-and-courts/discrimination/protected-characteristics/sex-discrimination/
'If you're treated unfairly because you're a man or a woman, this is sex discrimination. It applies to men and women of any age and so it includes girls and boys.'

From his Mum of course🙄
Giving her son ' full backing' to wear a pony tail won't cut any ice with a school worth it's salt. They won't care about your backing him to break the rules you signed up for.
You have no tolerance for stupid pointless rules? They won't care about that either because they're not going to debate with you which rules you will graciously accept and which not.
If the length of his hair is of such importance to you, perhaps you should start looking for a school which allows pony tails etc do that he can start fresh there after the summer holidays.

Schools shouldn’t be able to discriminate on the basis of religion.