What does your 11/12yr old do after school?

[Feckthisishard]

I have an 11yr old DS who finds it hard to entertain himself unless it involves a ps4 or his phone. He games with his friends which I don’t mind as it’s sociable for him, and he also does scouts one night a week which is pretty active, plus cricket another night, so I’m not overly concerned - but when we’re at home, his default option is always screen related. Am I being totally unrealistic to expect anything else? I suggested he cooks something for tea one night and he liked the idea of that but I know he’ll be easily distracted with his phone!

Empties & loads dishwasher, has a drink and snack. Does any homework. Hobby 2x per week, after school club one night.

other than that practises for hobby and chills out watching tv

Lurking for ideas as we're in a similar situation here, especially as home work has really reduced in the last couple of weeks of term, it's out of season for DD's main sport and, this week at least, too hot to play tennis or go for a run.
There's a long time to fill between getting home around 4pm and going to bed at 9!

DD is home at 4pm. Eats a bit and then tackles homework.

She has a variety of clubs, most starting at 6pm-ish so when she is back it's dinner and then she can watch TV or play on her phone etc.

I expect her to put away any clean clothes and sort out her bag after dinner. I cook but she helps at the weekends.

Is there any way he'd practise throwing a ball at stumps? My 9 yr old is suddenly into that. Harder in winter but good for now.

Water the garden..play on trampoline. Water fun. Walks in woods...cool.off.

My DD the same age has some friends that live very locally so she often goes to their house or they come to ours. We've also started letting her go to the park and to the local shop, library and ice cream parlour etc. It's a very safe area with lots of families around. She also has a few clubs during the week as well. If no one is around she ends up playing sims and watching Netflix.

Homework, bit of cleaning to earn pocket money, youth club, scouts, cadets, drama, hanging out at the park or by the stream, 40mins screen time, whatsapps friends...

Have same concern with mine and they’re only 9/7. They do a fair amount of clubs but the rest of the time are glued to screens

He has dance classes Monday, Wednesday and Friday and piano Tuesday. Any spare time is used practicing piano, doing home work, eating, catching Pokémon, watching tv, playing on switch, on his phone etc. if he wasn’t so busy then gaming/phone usage would be an issue because that definitely is his default mode to.

My son is 11. He is not allowed on any devices (including his phone) on school days, until Friday afternoons. He is, however, allowed to watch YouTube on the TV which he does until dinner at 5 30. Mostly stuff like DanTDM or The Gaming Beaver. After dinner he messes around in the playroom with his Pokemon cards or plays with the dog. If I am on a day off (rare) then I will spend time with him, chatting about school. Or he helps me with the packed lunch for the next day.

DS at 11/12 would do homework, bake, go fishing, read, scouts, swim, play football, play computer games, board games, draw. Do odd jobs like gardening and walking dogs to earn some money.

Either goes out with his friends on his bike, plays football in the garden with his younger brother, plays on the trampoline or goes on his PlayStation. Two nights a week he has football training and basketball training (two sessions for one of them) and doesn't get in until gone 7 anyway. In the summer we often go down to the beach for a swim/body board after school as we are a short walk from the sea.
I don't mind him spending a bit of time on the PlayStation as I feel he does a lot of other outdoorsy type stuff and plays a lot of sports.

You could be describing my 12yr old. Comes home, has snack, does homework on screen (which I suspect also involves a lot of time faffing around playing games), watches TV, plays on Nintendo while talking to friends on phone. If I tell him to quit the screens he lies on his bed listening to Spotify. Also reads his kindle. He does clubs two days a week. I'll be watching for ideas!

Just limit the screens, they won't think of anything else to do until you do that.

We didn't have any consoles, so after school was homework, reading, gardening, swimming (club), cooking, TV and anything else they fancy. Plus some school clubs when they fancied them.

Forgot to say he sometimes goes out on his bike on summer evenings by himself, just cycling round the streets. He also goes to Scouts once a week. Also he might watch TV with his Dad (stuff like Police Interceptors or wildlife programmes) until bath time.

Good thread. Youtube on tv that's him. Scouts and going out in nature once a week. I would like him to do an instrument but gave up. Chess. Chores cooking and homework. Moping around in the garden with little sister. watering stuff and eating stuff at the same time. Reading. A lot. Pretty boring really. I want him to do basket or something next year.

Does the internet/phone thing. Also plays outside with the neighbours' kids. Something which other lovely neighbours have done their best to stop, because they sre bastards who had their time playing outside as a child and don't want other children to have it. 😡

My 10 and 12 year old have football three nights a week, they usually come home from school, have a snack and then play out with friends. Usually have a bit of screen time before bed.

Mine does after school clubs most days so doesn't get home from school til just before 5, then dinner and homework and then often a club in the evening (dance, music, scouts etc). We.often give lifts to friends so they will be at ours for food or to play before or after They will walk the dog, go to the park or play on the trampoline mostly. We don't do gaming or devices but she would watch a lot of TV if the time was available!

I find it better to remove the option you don't want, so a compete ban on gaming on certain days for eg. We say no to the TV going on in the week a lot Otherwise it's just too hard for them to choose something else.