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Original poster

Signed off work - out and about or not?

49 replies

StressStresses · 07/07/2022 15:53

If you knew someone who had been signed off work with (work) stress, caring responsibilities then bereavement of a very close relative, would you think it was wrong to see them in the gym, shops or pub whilst they were off?

OP posts:

x2boys · 07/07/2022 16:25

As others say no although I wouldn't post pictures of myself all the time on Facebook, not that I do anyway.

User0610134049 · 07/07/2022 16:25

No… but I too would probably feel self conscious about it and try to avoid places I’d be seen

Echobelly · 07/07/2022 16:27

No, you are signed off from work, not life.

PurpleDaisies · 07/07/2022 16:27

I wouldn’t go to a pub but I’d go pretty much anywhere else. I’m not sure that’s for any logical reason though. I wouldn’t be posting anything on social media.

Original poster

StressStresses · 07/07/2022 16:34

Yes, the pub is a difficult one in my head and I'm not sure when (if) I'll feel ok to do that.

My managers are great, very supportive which is a huge help.

OP posts:

Dancingqueenwannabe · 07/07/2022 17:13

Not at all. When I signed off sick last year my boss advised me to go out and continue to live my life. Obviously not out in pubs every weekend and plastering it all over social media but he said it was vitally important I was up and out of the house.

Babyroobs · 07/07/2022 17:18

One of my collegues is currently off work with covid in a caravan in Norfolk.

DasGirl · 07/07/2022 17:22

Definitely not wrong. I'm an HCP and for someone with those issues I would be actively encouraging them to get out and about.
They are going to take longer to recover if they lock themselves away at home.

However if it were me I would be mindful of the people who were covering my work and wouldn't post on social media

Lovinglife45 · 07/07/2022 17:22

Okay to be out and about as life goes on.

Not okay to post on social media.

EverySockIsOdd · 08/07/2022 04:12

No, that's exactly what they should be doing to recover.

EverySockIsOdd · 08/07/2022 04:14

ComtesseDeSpair · 07/07/2022 16:21

I’d raise an eyebrow a bit at the pub. Out and about generally or exercising not at all.

Ridiculous opinion.

OP do whatever you need to to get better. That is what this time is for.

daisychain01 · 08/07/2022 04:24

Gwenhwyfar · 07/07/2022 16:05

No, but where I live the certificate says whether the person has to stay in or not.

I'd love to know where you live where a sickness note dictates to an autonomous adult how they are feeling and hence whether they're permitted to step outside their front door. Talk about infantilising - being unwell shouldn't become a house arrest!

EverySockIsOdd · 08/07/2022 05:45

So well put. How is anybody meant to recover for physical or mental problems sufficiently to go back to work and do their job properly if they cannot first get back to normal social life? Going to see friends, even going on holiday, is all part of recovery after a serious problem. The medical note says you are not yet fit to work, not that you are under house arrest. In fact feeling like you are will slow/ halt your recovery so detrimental to you and the employer. Honestly forget this idea, it is bonkers stone-age stuff.

ComDummings · 08/07/2022 05:58

Not at all. I would be happy that they’re doing things to help them feel a bit better.

KatherineJaneway · 08/07/2022 06:05

Decades ago the mentally was, if you were signed off unwell that meant you had to stay at home. If you were out and about, it meant you clearly were not sick and were taking the piss.

Thankfully these days most people realise that going to the gym, on holiday or other activities can be beneficial for the individual signed off.

shrugitoffonemoretime · 08/07/2022 06:05

Being honest....if I saw a colleague who was signed off due to work in the pub or on holiday I'd be pretty pissed off.

carefullycourageous · 08/07/2022 06:13

shrugitoffonemoretime · 08/07/2022 06:05

Being honest....if I saw a colleague who was signed off due to work in the pub or on holiday I'd be pretty pissed off.

This is really immature, I think you would be happier if you worked on this.

The OP has been signed off with stress due to caring responsibilities and bereavement. How do you think humans recover from stress?

Are you jealous of the OP's stress and grief, is that why you would be 'pissed off'? Such an inappropriate response to another person.

User74936782 · 08/07/2022 06:16

Yes it's fine but I wouldn't put a load of stuff on SM about it.

coffeecupsandfairylights · 08/07/2022 06:28

No.

However my experience of being signed off with stress and MH issues myself tells me that, in real life, people do care and unfortunately they will try and use it against you and will badmouth you because of it.

When I was off sick (and out and about with full encouragement from my doctor) I got a lot of comments along the lines of "if you're well enough to do x, you're not sick and should be in work" etc.

GreyCarpet · 08/07/2022 08:00

Yes. I was signed of work with stress several years ago. My GP said at the time that my time of work was about healing and that I should consider social events, the gym, yoga, etc as part of my treatment. Self care. And that I should still do th all, if not more. I spent a lot of time in the house but it was crucial that I went out and met up with other people etc for my recovery. I've not had a day off work with stress since because I recalibrated my priorities.

I wouldn't judge someone who was off work for stress for any reason who was taking time to care for their mental health I whatever way they saw fit.

A friend of mine has just gone back to work on a phased return after being signed off for 6 weeks. His issues weren't strictly work related but work wasn't helping. It took him a good few weeks to he able to do anything without feeling huge guilt about it.

He used the time to decorate his house, take the time to just 'be' and meet up with a few friends for coffee and walks. And, yes, he even went to the pub couple of times (for gigs, he doesn't drink). To begin with, he felt guilty for doing anything that wasn't just sitting down staring at 4 walls. It took him time to come to terms with the fact that his job is just what he does and not who he is.

If someone is off work for stress due bereavement or caring responsibilities, the bereavement and caring responsibilities don't just disappear. Time off work just gives someone time to regroup and take care of themselves.

GreyCarpet · 08/07/2022 08:03

shrugitoffonemoretime · 08/07/2022 06:05

Being honest....if I saw a colleague who was signed off due to work in the pub or on holiday I'd be pretty pissed off.

Whereas, if I saw it, I'd be pleased they were taking care of themselves and doing things that were good for them.

Most people won't be on the lash every day or treating it like an extended holiday. Most people will be struggling to do these things and a holiday might benefit them greatly, expedite their recovery and subsequent return to work, and mean they are better positioned to avoid such episodes in the future.

It's so short sighted to view people as working machines and not complex living beings.

ilovelurchers · 08/07/2022 08:14

No, not at all.

When I was off work with stress the Dr told me it was important I got out as much as possible.

I had drinks with a friend who is signed off with stress just the other night actually. She's getting little social interaction at home (her fella isn't great) so it's really important that she gets to spend time with other people I think!

Antarcticant · 08/07/2022 08:16

Not wrong at all. Sitting around the house would do their mental health no favours.

balalake · 08/07/2022 08:49

You need to eat and exercise. Pub I think would be likely to attract criticism.

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