Am I the only sad twat who eats out alone?

[ReallyFuckingHopeThisWorksOut]

I've been doing it for years and I actually enjoy it. In fact I sometimes even choose to go alone rather than with someone because I just can't be bothered with company. Whilst in a relationship it's never bothered me, but at the minute I'm feeling a bit fragile because I'm single and very lonely in general... so I feel like everyone else looks at me and knows how I'm feeling!

I booked a table earlier and in fairness there was a language barrier so I had to tell him I wanted a table for just me, but he didn't seem to understand for ages! Most people don't bat an eyelid but very, very occasionally waiters have looked a bit "oh!" when I've walked in alone and asked for a menu "just for me".

I wouldn't dress up to the nines and go somewhere really fancy surrounded by couples or anything, it's usually standard pubs or cafes or somewhere I can sit in a corner after a long hike or shopping trip and just eat a hot meal and read a magazine or something in peace for half an hour.

I tell myself it's good that I'm independent and can do things without other people but I do sometimes think to myself, man just admit it... what a sad wanker I am.

So many people on here recommend it... in reality I don't know anyone else who does!

IME, going into restaurants alone is particularly enjoyable in France. Many's the time when the waiter has enthusiastically asked if I would like a quiet table in the corner or one on the periphery for people-watching. I always go for the people-watching, which seems to win waiter approval.

I do it sometimes but usually only lunch at wagamamas or somewhere equally as inconspicuous! 😂
Not that I care, but I’m just rarely on my own without either the dc or friends or dh. When I am, I take the opportunity to choose where I want to eat and when, then just enjoy the peace!

I’d eat lunch or coffee & cake in a cafe on my own without thinking twice about it but never go out for dinner on my own unless I’m away with work and then I tend to stay in the hotel for food where there’s often lots of other business travellers on their own. If I don’t eat in the hotel I get M&S salad or similar to eat in my room.

There's nothing sad or twattish about eating out alone.

I've done it hundreds of times. I travelled the world independently and did it then and I do it now. I'm a sophisticated, intelligent woman with a mind if my own, how pathetic to think this is in some way 'twattish'.

I do and I brag about it! Especially if I have to wait for something or I need a break from shopping I'll go and get a really nice meal.

I love eating in company because food is a social activity but I also love the peace and calm of dining alone.

Yes, I love it! I've been to some pretty nice restaurants on my own for an evening dinner when in another city for work etc, and really enjoyed it. I also quite happily go for lunch/coffee on my own while at home, never been for dinner but that's because DH/kids are always around. I do a mixture of reading my Kindle and people watching. It's lovely, and I don't think I'm a sad twat. If any of the others have a problem with it, it's on them, not me.

I've only done it once outside the UK that I can remember and even then (French ski resort) it was fine.

I eat out for lunch or breakfast on my own, quite a bit in the last year as I've had a house full of builders. I have only eaten dinner solo on work trips.
I went to Wimbledon yesterday on my own and don't think anyone cared a hoot.
I think of dinner as a social event if eating out, the theatre or movie can be enjoyable solo.

I’m one of the women who eat out alone in very nice places wherever I am in the world. In fact one thing that’s surprised me about the thread is people saying they’d go for coffee and cake or lunch but not dinner or to ( their words) ‘a posh restaurant’. It’s not something I’d even try to understand because it takes all sorts or make the world go round. That said though - I enjoy eating out alone whether it’s breakfast, lunch or dinner and I’m not intimidated by ‘posh’ (not my choice of word).

I eat lunch alone in a cafe if I'm going shopping. Why doesn't that count as eating out on my own just because it's lunch and not dinner?

I enjoy going to the cinema on my own too.

I don't usually have dinner at a fancy restaurant on my own because I consider it too extravagant for just me. DH and the DCs are around too, so not always possible.
The only time I have was when I was away from home.

It wouldn't even occur to me that others would judge me or think I'd been stood up. Nothing sad about eating o your own.

I often eat out by myself. Normally cafes and pubs but some restaurants, No one clutches their pearls/asks the hussy to leave etc etc. The more women do it alone, the less it will be thought of as odd. If you feel weird, take a book/laptop/phone with you.

The thing is, I get to eat what I want to eat, not a compromise.

I went out for lunch with my dog today.

It was lovely. He had a sausage and i had a falaffel and haloumi salad.

Sometimes you just need time to yourself and even better if that time involves food.

Spent a lot of time travelling for business, from mid '80s and 2000.

At first, I would have room service, when I got bored of that I would pick up M&S deli bits to eat in my room.

At some point I realised that if I wanted to eat at a table, I would be eating alone. My experience had been very good, usually the staff look out for me, chat just s little more than they would if I were with others and so remember my likes and dislikes.

I really enjoy eating out by my self, I highly reccomnended it.

I also tip lavishly, too. It really helps.

@Dogappreciationsociety This reminds me of when I used to have a picnic with my dog every weekend. We'd go to the local farmers market and she'd get a plain chicken skewer from one of the food trucks and I'd get a rice bowl, then we'd sit in the park and watch the world go by together. It was lovely.

My current dogs don't like other dogs, so it's too stressful to manage them and eat a picnic at the same time :(

I also tip lavishly, too. It really helps
How does it help?
I'm puzzled because you tip once you've finished your meal and are leaving.
I can see it being helpful if you are going to the same place over and over again with the same staff serving you but not if you are choosing different restaurants.

This puzzled me too… always those of us who say we eat out alone are accused of lying. Why? Why would we lie? And are those who don’t believe us really so insular and small-minded that they can’t grasp that some of us are perfectly happy to eat out alone?

I’m very very content in my own company. I eat out alone at least once a week. I go to the cinema on my own. I go to concerts on my own. I go to craft fairs, plays, shows, museums, matches etc on my own. I holiday on my own. I’ve holidayed in the country, Europe and America on my own. I’ve done those things with others too, but doing them on my own has been as enjoyable, if not more so. I feel sorry for people who are too self-conscious and insecure to do things on their own, tbh.

I think we are a product of our upbringing. My mum wouldn't go anywhere alone. Women didn't approach the bar, pay for a drink, ask a man out, eat out alone etc etc. When my dad died, she was completely hopeless without him. I was brought up on these rules until I saw sense. If we don't live like we're free, we are insulting all the women who fought/fight for our freedoms. And completely wasting our own lives.

Yip, I do it too. Not to a big fancy restaurant or anything but if I was out for a walk and got hungry I'd certainly nip into a coffee shop/ cafe and eat something! Used to always to this to kill time before starting work too

I miss my uni days of going to the local sushi bar and setting up a film on my iPad and just being alone. As a busy single mum it was the only time alone I ever got and the only time I could eat without having to share!

Here's today's!

I'm not single and don't associate it with singledom. I do it and love it.
I also enjoy going to the cinema and exhibitions alone and have been to Wimbledon on my own too. It's so relaxing: no need to agree what to see with anyone else, move at someone else's pace etc.

I do it! I usually do it on a whim tho if I’m out shopping or waiting for someone. I just act confident and say. I make sure I have a book or something to entertain me in between.

I've eaten out alone all over the place. No issues. Ate my way round Spain on one particularly excellent trip. To the posters saying "what if people thought I'd been stood up" etc, your life will be immeasurably happier when you realise that no one cares what you are up to (well ok they might if you danced starkers on the table) but otherwise everyone is too busy living their own life to care. It's very teenage to think "everyone is looking at meeeeeeeeeeee". They aren't. No one cares.

Its so strange to me to read things like "I'd hate for someone to think I've been stood up" etc. I think I'm just a very practical person but its never occured ti me to think like this. If I am hungry I need to eat. So if no one is with me at that time, I need to eat on my own. Its never occured to me to put any other thought into it. When I first came to the uk for uni (overseas student) my uk friends would always meet OUTSIDE the coffee shop. For then to walk in as a group. I never got that. Why waste valuable minutes waiting when I could already be sat down having coffee? (And a cigarette in those days). Likewise with dates. Why would I wait OUTSIDE (in the rain) when I could be inside sipping a drink and wait for you there? Life is too short, genuinely too short for all this waiting. I do lots of things on my own, my life wouldn't be anywhere near where it is today if I did everything in a group.

Why would you choose to limit yourself to only doing certain things with others when it's not a requirement to be with someone else? Life is too short. I couldn't give a monkeys what anyone else thinks of me eating alone, going on holiday or to the theatre alone, etc. I do plenty of things with others, but don't let being alone limit me.