Anyone with both partners working just not coping ?

[theyhavenothingbuttheaudacity]

Both work. No financial help available
No cloth to cut
We are drowning and I'm scared what happens next

You may have to consider another job tbh. If you’re fuel costs to work are pushing you into poverty then you might want to look at what else is available locally (as in one journey commute either by car, foot, public transport) and see if it adds up to keeping more cash in your pocket. You might find you can afford to take a lower wage if the job itself isn’t costing you.

OP didn't seem that keen on listing expenditure when a PP suggested the same....

Not much we can help with then, except to point her in the direction of organisations and charities who might be able to help with budget and any debt.

If the kids aren't his and you are both seeing other people when you are not together what difference does it make if he plays golf every weekend? As long as he is paying his share of bills etc his money is his to do as he pleases I guess.

There's struggles like yours - with a partner who can spend hundreds on the golf,

then there's struggles - OP we both work Ft, have another 13 months of FT nursery fees at over 1k a month and atm the food shopping and electric bill is meaning that the credit card is taking a hit and only the min payment is going each month. I dread to think the balance we will have this time next year - we are racking up debt to keep going with the idea its only another 13 months.

so yup, not easily coping right now - I've had a 2k payrise, DH had 4k rise - its been eaten up by doubled fuel bills and food bills.

What a bizarre thread. If you're not providing any real details so that people can offer actual advice, what is it you want from this?

I've done the sums the budgeting working out what I can cut back on.
Just wanted to know if anyone else is struggling that's all

This is irrelevant to this thread why bring that up on a thread about struggling ?

He hasn't paid hundreds on golf
He play at the six pounds a go local
Council course occasionally

@ComtesseDeSpair this is something on my mind often

It is relevant because you could split up again next week. The point is that you can't depend on his income.
Lots of people are struggling. You're far from alone.

Well the simple answer to that is yes, how could they not be? Prices are doubling all over the place.

Previous comments about prev threads (I'm not one to go digging in Adv search) say he's there both days most weekends, tie in the £12 a week course fees with the pint or 2 before/after, fuel to get there and other incidentals - can easily tally up to over £100 a month, I know - DH used to play.

We'd absolutely love a 3rd child, It breaks my heart every day, but we just cannot afford it the way things are. But things will not stabilise for a while yet, and so we will all have to find other ways to do things.

@theyhavenothingbuttheaudacity

I would report any posts linking previous thread.

Mumsent is supposed to be a source of annymous support?

It can't serve that function if poster's are allowed to either link previous thread or say they recognise a style or spelling.

You are a mum struggling like we all are and you have come here to chat about that.

Unfortunately some absolutely bizare poster with nothing better or kinder,to do have come crashing in.

Personally I wish mhhq would ban this.

If any one thinks you are a "troll" they need to privately report.

Op report each post linking your past thread it's not the ethos of the site at all.

They ruin threads and it must be the same posters?

I hope that made you feel a bit better ?

The rules of the site are clear. No troll hunting. Any suspicions report to admin
Also nobody is obliged to respond to a thread 🤷🏼‍♀️

completely contradicted in earlier threads

For as long as I’ve been here people have always altered some aspects of their issues, this helps to remain anonymous while still getting help with the main underlying problem, doing an advanced search purely to call people out on if they said married or partner, son or daughter, or their kids ages - is just digging to cause a problem in my opinion. Why does it matter what advice they’ve asked for in the past?

Op you're right in that nobody is obliged to reply.
However, as it's been pointed out the majority of posters are going to reply in good faith and so it's disingenuous to create a thread containing contradictory information from other threads or post you may have previously created

And as stated already- if you think something doesn't add up MN will look into it

@QforCucumber thanks

@TiddleyWink

I totally disagree.

There are a million ways to look at one problem and you can post the same issues on different days and get totally different responses.
Depending on which of the tremendous amount of users are on?

The op, any op absolutely has the right to chat/ask about her problems.

I've done it myself many times; I've had fhe most hideous issues in various things and I've been thinking about different aspects of my problems.
Maybe those aspects have appeared because of a thread I've started. Things cropped up that I hadn't considered. So I will change some details then start a new thread but concentrating on the new aspect.

This has been enormously helpful to me which is the very spirit of this site?
Unfortunately though sometimes,the absolute saddos who think they are really clever come on and try and link to other threads which then stops the help.

Who benefits?

I've name changed so much and I've had so so so many threads about my in law's because they have caused me such deep pain.
In so many ways.

How does it hlp if I am outed?

Another posters recently had to stop a thread because some absolute ridiculous person had decided to do a background check???

In short,it's absolutely non of your business what someone posts and you need to report or move on.

Spot on so many people spoil anyone asking for support because they want to turn into self appointed Jessica Fletchers picking everything apart

@MobLife

I disagree as mentioned above and why.

There are some absolute painful people on mumsent who sit like giant spiders waiting for some prey.

They just ruin it.

I would op report all of the poster's and complain if you feel you can't use the site in the spirit that it was set up in.

I'e to be helpful.

There are some incredibly intelligent,kind posters on here.