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Lacking something

5 replies

Lancscake · 02/07/2022 19:53

I'm about to turn 40. I have a lovely husband, an erratic but lovable dog and a two year old son.

We live no where near any family. We've been in our area for 10 years now and I've made a couple of good friends who I meet up with for play dates or dog walks.

In 2017 I took up running (fast walking). Loved it as I was doing it as part of a group. Got pain in my hip to the extent I couldn't walk. Eventually was diagnosed with arthritis. Had to give up running completely. It was the only exercise I'd ever really got into so I was gutted.

Around the same time I got pregnant. I had HG and was off sick the whole time as I could barely get out of bed and couldn't drive. My little boy was born when the pandemic kicked in so after 12 months maternity I took a further 6 months unpaid leave as he had never been socialised so I wasn't ready for him to start nursery. So after more than 2 years I went back to work but now we are all home based. I miss the office. I miss the occasional long lunch at the café and I miss talking to colleagues daily. I never realised how much this formed part of my social life.

I feel unhappy and like something is missing. I don't feel I have an identity and I don't think I'm getting enough social connection. My only real interest is reading so I go along to a book club once a month now and that's great but it's only 2 hours a month.

In the past I have enjoyed aqua aerobics and breast stroke swimming but I can't find a aqua class at a time I can attend and I can't do breast stroke because of the hip. I tried a dance class but found it so stressful because I'm dyspraxic so struggle with direction/left/right/spacial awareness.

I want something social and active. I can't afford anything where I have to buy lots of stuff or expensive classes like the ones at a college.

I don't mean to sound negative. I'm sure I'll work it out but does anyone have any ideas?

OP posts:
Bookridden · 02/07/2022 20:04

Can you get involved with PTA at pre- school? Certainly when your son goes to school this is a great way of increasing your interactions. Do you do all the library storytimes, toddler groups and classes that are available to you?

Lancscake · 02/07/2022 20:45

@Bookridden Yes, we do toddler groups on my two days off. I have light-hearted chats but it's usually a very broken conversation because someone's toddler is crying/shouting/not sharing/needs help/moving out of sight etc. I really enjoy the time out of the house and to some extent I worry what I'll do with the time when he starts school. No PTA at nursery I don't think as it's private but will definitely sign up when he starts school X

OP posts:
KangarooKenny · 02/07/2022 20:52

Is there a dog walking group in your area ? Look on Facebook

NeedMoreMoneyMoney · 02/07/2022 20:55

How about the peanut app for meeting other mums? Or the meetup website for meeting people?

What other interests do you have?...is there a sports team you can join? Art class? Regular yoga class? Regular meditation class?

Is there anyone in the book club you'd like to see more of? Could you ask them to go for a drink or meal sometime?

Would your colleagues be up for some sort of in person meet up?

Is there a local running club? Have you joined any local Facebook groups just to find out about local stuff going on? Is there a WhatsApp group for the parents of your child?

SandyGussetButton · 02/07/2022 21:00

Bellringing?

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