Do I say something to HR?

[Amelanchier]

Work event yesterday, lots of drink and dance. Senior manager, married, late 30s/early 40s in the thick of the dancing, noticeably paying lots of attention to the younger attractive women but nothing too untoward. Afterwards about 20 of us head to another venue, he is very much the worse for drink, barely able to move, and rather more touchy feely with the youngest most junior and member of staff who comes across as very young and not at all streetwise. She didn't look too bothered, nor was she especially encouraging, she was just dancing. However, I felt uneasy and I felt relieved when he left separately before she did. Another man in the group commented on it, so it wasn't just me noticing.

Both people are adults. It was mostly after the official work event.

Yes, please tell HR. It’s not acceptable. It’s harassment, made worse by the imbalance of power.

I would warn her first, that you're dropping her into a situation.
Whether you think you should report regardless of her preferences is different question, but at very least she should be warned that she may be questioned about your complaint.

No MYOB. As she's working there I assume she's an adult. Take your beak right out.

I'd be inclined to say you felt he was out of line and that you'd be happy to support her if she wanted to take it further.

I think it's a bit late to do anything now, the time for you to say something was at the party. You could've checked she was ok or did she want help.

I would talk to her about 1st. She surely has a right to decide whether it’s something she wants to go to HR?

and when he’s sat talk to her about it, not to make her feel she has been the victim of something but just to let her know he was boarder line inappropriate and that she doesn’t have to put up with that again if she wasn’t happy with it.

you could always write up what you saw and date and save it should you need to go to HR in the future

But to be honest if you felt what you saw was crossing a line you should have intervened then.
you didn’t have to make a scene, you could have just told him X was looking for him at the bar and moved him away

Yes you should say something.

It made you feel uncomfortable.

Good people need to speak up about these things.

And this is why work, lots of drink and dancing don't go together. Perhaps I am too puritanical, but I don't think work events and alcohol mix well, and this sort of thing happens all too often.

Whilst I wouldn't be happy with what happened here, I would have said something at the time, or perhaps did some “active bystander” type thing to divert his attention from the younger woman. But unless there was more of a history here then no, I would not report it. I would speak to him individually, point out that he had been the worst for wear and acted somewhat badly, and he needed to be careful that there was no repetition because such behaviour could lead to complaints and problems for him. But for a one off occasion I wouldn’t report this because you are all adults, you chose to socialise at a venue that was not the workplace and to indulge in alcohol. If you had observed this in a club and it wasn’t a colleague, you might think the man something of a prat but your wouldn’t have been reporting it to their employer even if you knew who the employer was.

Thanks for the interesting mix of views which has helped me clarify my thinking.

On the basis that she is an adult and she looked happy dancing, and not distressed or uncomfortable, and she was not in a position alone with him, then I will not say anything to HR. My discomfort is not her problem. We were all quite close in the bar but she had space to move away if she'd wanted.

I do judge that manager - he has gone down in my estimation. If a similar situation occurred again I think being the active bystander, letting him know he is seen, would be the thing to do. To give him the opportunity to moderate and check his behaviour. Particularly given how keen he is to take opportunities to show off his progressive D&I credentials.

Sorry that last sentence doesn't read well - I mean I think he's a hypocrite.

I got that. And I agree. I would have to say something to him about the alcohol if nothing else, but I'd honestly say the whole thing - but quietly and privately. Most everyone has been an idiot with alcohol at some point in time, but it should be something one learns from. And any amount of alcohol and employment is a risky mix. I wouldn't drink at all at a works event (and I do drink, but not to excess)

What would you expect an HR department to actually do with this information?

All messengers are usually shot IMHO.

I work in HR and if you came to us with this information it would be noted (sometimes it is useful to have information you keep in your back pocket) but ideally we'd want this to be coming from the young employee in question. It's difficult otherwise to judge exactly what happened if you're relying on third parties and either of the involved parties don't want to speak to us. So I'd be more inclined to speak to the younger employee and just let her know that you saw what went on and would support her if she did want to complain.