If you have adult DC have they taken their stuff?

[YourLittleSecret]

Prompted by reading a thread on downsizing and de-cluttering.
I think it's reasonable to keep all their stuff while they are renting but as soon as they buy then I think they should take it.

Then it comes down to the sentimental things like teddies and toys.
I have kept a selection of good quality toys like lego and brio but I also have huge bags of teddies which I am now tempted to get rid of.

Dh and I bought our house 8 years ago, I still have a few things (collectable barbies and a keepsake box) at my parents. The barbies I'm selling, the keepsake box, is more sentimental to them than me. We have more stuff in storage at my inlaws because when we had ds we had to box loads of stuff up and they offered attic and garage space. We're moving this year, so it will be coming to the next house.

DB on the other hand has loads at my parents, but he's currently on a 5 year placement working abroad, no point taking most of that stuff.

Teddies lived in the unused cot, both teddies and cot went, save one, on his first birthday. No interest in them. Toys went as he outgrew them. He is 16 and so still at home but only uses his bedroom, no excessive stored things. To be fair, we emigrated when he was 10 with only a suitcase each. I was the same, had decluttered myself from the age of 9, when I moved out I took everything.

😂😂😂 no chance!
And every summer whatever came home from uni never seemed to go back. So much stuff!

Ours are all grown but I was guilty of keeping so much stuff from when they were small so we had a huge sort out a couple of years ago.

Our youngest has boomeranged a couple of times so we've ended up with bits of furniture & stuff in storage here. Hopefully soon it can go - doesnt clutter feel claustrophobic?

I have a good friend though whose own Mum kept everything from her childhood (we're both mid-60s) & friend too kept all of her own children's stuff - & then couldn't understand why her daughter wasnt interested in boxes & boxes of clothes & reading books & (dusty) shoes 🥴 for her own kids. Friends house though is busy with lots of stuff everywhere & she loves it 🙂

Mine has some of her stuff here, some soft toys, , clothes, like fleeces, T-shirts, underwear etc,loads of toiletries for when she visits, most of her paperwork, some books blah blah . It’s still her room and it will always be her home as long as we live here , so I’m fine with it, even though she’s 26 and has her own place 😂

My late Mil kept everything we didn't have the room and we had so much to clear out when she died it was really difficult for Dh and siblings , this made me realise its just "stuff" and not to keep everything it maybe helps that I'm not sentimental I find getting rid easy .

Not yet as both are in University. I took what I could pack in a small bag when my mother left my violent father, went back to collect our stuff to find he’d cleared my bedroom and thrown everything away.

I'm still renting and a tiny place so not only are my parents owed a clear out of stuff that's been sitting in my old room and garage for too many years but they also act as rotational storage for seasonal items I don't have room for!

I can't bear to get rid of soft toys though. I still feel a childhood guilt that I'd be hurting 'their' feelings!! 😂😂😂

My parents downsized at the same time as I bought my first house. It was take it or chuck it.

DH boomeranged 'home' (his mum had actually moved several times in the interim, including overseas and back) before we moved in to rented together, his stepdad turned up with all his stuff from theirs they day we moved in 😂

Yes they should have their stuff once they have their own home.

We are a pretty minimalist household and the older ones took their stuff to Uni, and there was actually not much left behind.

The youngest when they go - I will have to decide what to do with any remaining detritus but I intend to weed out all toys/books in advance of them going.

There are sentimental things we would never want to get rid of, unless they take them, but boxes of books I bought for the kids in charity shops can just go back to charity shops, if the kids don't want them. I think we do not care much about things and this has rubbed off on the kids, they have their special items but really not a lot when you measure the volume.

Plenty of stuff here but we have room to store it tidily. Periodically I get them to have a sort out but they have busy lives and when they are able to visit I don't want too much time spent on decluttering. We have told them many times that if it's all still here when we die it will be their problem.

Plenty of stuff here but we have room to store it tidily.
So do we, so do probably most parents. I think if you have the room it's harder to be ruthless. Clearing out my late mother's house brought it home to me. The things she had cherished for 60 years - my first shoes for example, were of no interest to me. Dsis and I kept only a small box of mementos. A friend of mine emptied all her late parents house and has kept it all in storage. She says she'll get round to sorting it sometime. 🙄

DS is nearly 30 and lives in a flat with his girlfriend. We have a loft so have several boxes of keepsakes from babyhood, toys, teddies etc, school and uni stuff which we store. However, I don't think DS would bat an eyelid if we dumped almost all of it and I can't see him ever coming to get it.
I don't really know why I keep most of it as I don't get it down and look through it like I do with photos but I know what's up there and can picture the "important stuff" in my mind. It's probably a comfort thing for me and DH.🤔

One Christmas we bought each of our three adult children a small chest that had some of their precious stuff, and we made copies of some of the photos from the numerous photo albums from their childhood. We never really kept very many toys except legos., which the GC now enjoy.

After they bought houses, the chests went to theirs.

Youngest is in the military overseas for two more years, the closet in his room is stacked floor to ceiling with his stuff, as we moved here after he left. Middle child moved back after uni, and the eldest is married and lives 3000 miles away. I mailed the last of his stuff to him before we moved

Mine still has some stuff here. I am early 40s and there's still a few things at my parents house I never took. Unless I was packing and moving therefore throwing things out I wouldn't get rid of anything. If I need to they can either choose to collect or have it chucked then. But I'll ask first.

I'm 42 and still have stuff at my parents'!

In my defense, I live overseas and I was only supposed to be here 2 years but nearly 15 years later and there are a shit ton of pictures from the early 2000s to sort through when I go back to Uk next week!!

I hope my kids leave their stuff when they're older. I can use it to bring them back for Sunday lunches whilst they wade through it whilst enjoying wistful memories and enjoy the wafting smell of roast potatoes and lamb (always makes me homesick)!

I am completely unsentimental about stuff so I've always decluttered as I've gone through life, my mum was exactly the same. Things like teddies, toys and old school work were all gone by the time I was 14. There just wasn't any need to keep it. My goal is not to leave a massive amount of stuff for someone else to deal with when I die.

I only recently picked up my wedding dress (been married 14 years...)

We have been minimalists since October last year and my three kids each have a very small box of baby keepsakes which they won't want but I do.

I can't think your kids will want any of the stuff you are keeping right now.

I would gift/chuck it - it will be a relief all round.

Nope, my garage is half full of their stuff. DS does officially still live here although he's away doing a phd so hardly ever here, doesn't get long holidays. Dd moved into her own house a year ago and her room here has still got loads of stuff in.

I like your style. There is a thing called 'Swedish death cleaning' which is based on the idea that you should tidy up before you go and not burden your loved ones.

I am definitely not leaving my lovely kids with a load of shit to sort.

Never mind stuff, my grown-up DDs still live with us after returning from university or work abroad. I can’t see them being able to have their own places any time soon.

Also, since I became a minimalist, my kids have really got on it too.

It means I will still tidy their rooms for them (they are 14, 12 and 8) as it only takes minutes.

Memories are literally in our memory, not in boxes of stuff we don't need and haven't used for 20 years.

I was told "you've got your own loft now!" within a few weeks of buying my own place.
Strangely all those childhood dolls and teddies didn't seem so appealing or sentimental once I knew they were headed to mine!