Dd being left out by friends

[ghosttree]

My dd is 9 and has two close friends. They have been friends since they were 6. All has been fine until recently the two other friends have started to do more together.

My dd is frequently being left out and they even had a party for a younger sibling and didn't invite dd. Usually all 3 would come to siblings party's. They arrange to see each other out of school and have lied to my dd about it.

I feel sad for my dd as she doesn't know what to do. How can I help her?

I've said she could try and play with others at school but everyone I mention she tells me has a best friend and they don't want to play with anyone else!

What else could I suggest?

My dd is in a similar situation but she is also being bullied by the girls who used to be her friend. Has she been left out over a long period of time or is this a relatively new turn of events? It it's only happened quite recently then things may go back to how it was before. My dd is also in Y4 and I've found that she really doesn't 'fit' with the girls in her class. She's not sporty like some of them, she doesn't have a mobile phone and all the social media apps. I think a lot of the girls spend time on this nowadays.

9 is a common age for this to happen. My DD is now a year older and it has all settled down. I wouldn't read too much into the sibling's party. At that age I'd say it was unusual to be invited to a sibling party, the sibling is also growing up and wants their friends, not their sibling's friends.
Suggest inviting one over one week and the other the next.
Give her some ideas of what to do at break - even if it means asking e.g. the boys if she can play football with them.
Suggest some things she can do alone (learn to juggle, skipping rope etc )
Most importantly, I'd say teach her to be civil, to know her limits of what she thinks is acceptable and not to retaliate in any way.

Hi,

I know this thread is a few months old but have things worked themselves out?

My DD is going through the same and not sure how to support her through it.

Its really hard!