Am I the only person who can't bear noise?

[Kris02]

I honestly wonder if there is something wrong with me. As I've got older, I absolutely cannot bear noise. I'm typing this with the windows closed and noise-blocking headphones on because cars with modified exhausts are screaming up and down the country lanes near me. All I hear morning and night is the screeching and popping/banging of their exhausts. It's driving me insane.

If I go into town and a child suddenly screams, or a door slams, I jump out of my skin. It's like I've become hyper-sensitive. Is it just a part of ageing? I live in terror of noisy neighbors moving in. If it was really bad, and they were the violent/confrontational type, I think it would be the end of me. I mean, it would end in a suicide attempt.

It does sound like you might need to get some help with that, yes.x

I hear you.

Misophonia. I've got it. And it gets worse with stress. It has got worse with age. I suggest CBT to find ways to manage it

My mum had a hard time with hearing - loud noises made her feel really impatient. My kids talking at the same time, even at normal levels was too much. Went on about a year til I insisted she get her hearing checked. Turns out she needed her ears cleaned! Completely back to normal after.
Hope it's something as simple as that for you!

It could be a symptom of stress, or it could be you are on the autistic spectrum. I'm the same, but it has improved the last 10 years, I'm 60ish.

The Road Traffic Act prohibits after sale exhaust modifications so it might be helpful to make a complaint to the police or ask your local parish council or regional councillor to take it up as an issue in that the RTA should be enforced. I believe there are some trials of a decibel reader taking place in one of the police areas, whether that will help who knows. Sympathies to you as we have similar issues but live in a town.

Read up on Auditory Processing Disorder.
I'm having my son assessed soon for this. He hates noise because his brain seems unable to distinguish between important sounds( teacher speaking) and unimportant sounds ( someone talking in the corridor/ clock ticking/ car horns). Noise causes him a lot of stress. There's listening therapy he can do to train the brain and help in these environments.

I have found The Highly Sensitive Person by Elaine Aron very useful

You're not the only one. I have Hyperacusis which for me means that I find too much noise hurts.

I have this definitely getting worse with age and stress.
Someone was talking really loudly in the hairdressers the other day for ages , I very nearly left halfway through my appointment.
I don't live in fear though OP - that seems extreme.

A family member suffers with this. They got hearing aids, which cancel out background noise.

I have this to an extent and feel absolutely DESPERATE around people who won't stop talking. It makes me want to crawl out of my skin.
At the end of a weekend with my in laws once, I ended up sitting on the floor of our en suite, with ear plugs in, in tears, because they wouldn't stop talking for even 5 minutes and I could hear the constant sound through the floor boards.

I am getting very intolerant. Just so depressing to be surrounded by noise all the time. I'm hoping to move to the country!

I have issues with noise. Not all noises, but the list of things I hate grows all the time. For example, I’ve always really disliked the sound of neighbours’ TVs coming through the wall and slamming doors, but now it’s any sound coming from next door. I think it’s a mixture of having always hated some noises (anything high-pitched, chewing) and a response to having lived next door to bad neighbours (any noise immediately makes me wonder what’s ‘going on’).

During lockdown a neighbour got a water feature and a high-pitched cat alarm - I stopped going in my garden immediately as couldn’t cope with them. The alarm seems to have stopped, so presumably someone else complained (I had a gardener once begging me to turn it off if it was mine, so obviously troubling for others).

I’m reliant on white noise to the point that I think I’ve damaged my hearing through constant headphone use. Without any noise, I now get bothered by tinnitus. I fantasise about living on a private island.

Feels good to talk about it.

I have this too. After years of living in flats and semis we finally bought our own house last and my number one priority was that it had to be detached on a quiet street. It’s made life much more bearable but I do feel the most relaxed when I’m at home on my own and I can control what noise there is in the house. I sleep with silicone earplugs in and have a white noise machine. A few years back I got a very bad ear infection that’s left me with tinnitus in my left ear and some hearing loss. The tinnitus isn’t that bad now but made me feel suicidal when it started. You have my sympathies OP.

I also have this, but not quite so extreme. I never ever remember it being an issue when I was younger or in my 20's but in the last 10 years it has got progressively worse. I can hear the faintest of sounds, which means normal audio levels to others seem horrifically loud to me. I also have certain triggers - although if I'm the one making the noise I can handle it strangely. For instance if I'm in a car someone else is driving, the sound of the indicator is a trigger - but when I'm the one driving it's fine. Not sure why that is!

although if I'm the one making the noise I can handle it strangely.

Yes! Re the water feature I mentioned above, we actually have one in our own garden that the previous owner left. Never used to put it on, but I always turn it on if going out now to drown out the neighbour’s. Theirs seems to vary in intensity and at its worst I was researching buying my own SECOND water feature to put right by the fence we share with them. This is in a tiny garden, btw. So the noise would be ‘mine’. Madness!

I use earplugs that reduce the noise, this enables me to function and reduces the stress I feel, they make spaces like airports or trains more bearable. Also, use them at home when the kids or neighbours are driving me crazy - this might be what others consider a normal amount of noise. I got mine from Loop and would definitely recommend.

Misophonia - I am the same. There are some things you can do to help - there are some ear buds you can wear www.flareaudio.com/ which are supposed to help. I also used to use a white noise machine www.amazon.co.uk/Machine-Colour-Anxiety-Machines-Children/dp/B098XX32MB/ref=asc_df_B098XX32MB/?tag=googshopuk-21&linkCode=df0&hvadid=535228085039&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=17828636273067662030&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=1006900&hvtargid=pla-1401432118763&psc=1

I used this strategy many, many years ago as a teenager when I lived at home. My df would have the tv blaring downstairs which would drive me to distraction but if I could match the programme on my own tv but at a barely audible volume I could sleep. The description earlier about it being a stressor if you can’t distinguish the sound makes sense.

I have this to an extent and feel absolutely DESPERATE around people who won't stop talking. It makes me want to crawl out of my skin

I’m raising one of these, I’m sorry

I hope it reduces with age but dd simply can’t be quiet, she narrates her thoughts if there’s no one to engage in mindless conversation. I’m trying my best to gently train her out of it but it’s hard going - I can feel my insides contracting when she just can’t be quiet.

You'll feel my pain I know, when I tell you my neighbour is vacuuming his ivy. Yes he is.

Have you looked into neurodivergence