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Original poster

Late night knock in door

86 replies

Debbiep11 · 21/06/2022 21:16

Ok, I just need some advice. My 13 year old is in bed. I get a knock at the door to find 4 kids of similar age to my son. This is now nearly 9pm on a school night . They ask to use the toilet , I politely say no. They ask to use the shower and I again say no. They then ask for a glass of water. I lock the door and get them a glass of water. The larger boy then asks for my son by his name. He said they knew him from primary school, then secondary school and then he says they play an online game with him . He told them he was unavailable right now. Now, here comes the even stranger part . He says "can you thank your son for our kiss. Did he tell you he was bi?".
Nothing against people who are of course but this really knocked me off my feet and I told them bye and closed the door. I had a chat with my son and he insists he doesnt know who they were (I told them the names they gave as my son didnt see them). He says he has never told anyone where he lives either.
It just seems they were up to no good and have really got me spooked. Am I overreacting here ?
My son is autistic and has no common sense at all to be honest although he is insisting he has never told anyone where we live but how else would they know?

OP posts:
marsdon · 21/06/2022 22:49

My first thoughts were how do you know these boys have given you there real names ?

They might not even go to the same school as your son.
Very strange thing to happen could be a dare or a wind up / prank by these boys nothing else better to do.
If it happens again do you have a neighbourhood watch police officer you could report it too.
Even a neighbour you could tell so if they see these kids hanging or knocking on your door they can come out and support you.

Original poster
Debbiep11 · 21/06/2022 22:50

WonderingWanda
Great advice, thanks. Will do that. I will sit down with my son and check the settings on his laptop as well. Just to make sure all the security settings are still in place.

OP posts:
thequeenoftarts · 21/06/2022 22:58

A tapo cctv camera is about 40 pounds and to link it to your phone is free, but to record is about a fiver a month. Sits on the windowsill nearest your front door

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13 year olds Families
Original poster
Debbiep11 · 21/06/2022 23:02

Marsden
I dont know if they told me their real names. Or even if they go to my sons school. I am just going bu what they said as nothing else to go by unfortunately.

No neighbourhood watch or anything like that and not really friendly with the neighbours unfortunately. I might have to see if I can borrow money from my brother for cctv or something . It's made me very nervous , especially for my son

OP posts:
misssunshine4040 · 21/06/2022 23:09

That would really unnerve me too. What nerve trying to get in your house!
Hope your ok and that's the last you hear from them

Blossomandbee · 21/06/2022 23:11

I wonder if they were pretending to be the 'Jake' from primary in the hope your son would think it was him and tell you to let them in. I hope they weren't trying to get upstairs to your son.
The 'thanks for the kiss' comment is very odd and smacks of bullying too.
I hope you get this sorted, it's a bit worrying.

champagnetruffleshuffle · 21/06/2022 23:13

My sister recently had some boys hanging around outside her house that asked about my nephew, using his name. She thinks they got the address from snapchat. If your son has any apps like this, check his privacy/location settings. I would also consider a call to 101 to get some advice from the police, at least then this will be logged in case anything else happens.

The advice to look at old school photos is good too.

ThreeLocusts · 21/06/2022 23:15

Hi OP, maybe barking up wrong tree entirely but would it be more affordable to get your hands on a fake/broken cctv camera? If they're bullying kids then the mere sight of the camera, working or not, may put them off.

Hope your son is OK and nothing more happens.

EmmiJay · 21/06/2022 23:15

If they come back, record them on your phone with the flash on. They'll either scatter off or try and hide their faces but at least you'll have some footage to show the school or police should it come to that. What little runts!

allboysherebutme · 21/06/2022 23:20

Can you afford a ring doorbell. ? X

CountessOfSponheim · 21/06/2022 23:22

If he's posted online pictures taken at home then they may have had location information embedded in them that would let people work out his address.

allboysherebutme · 21/06/2022 23:22

Maybe ask your son has anyone tried to kiss him. ? X

Oceanus · 21/06/2022 23:33

I hope you get some answers to this but tbh, I think you're too bloody nice, I wouldn't give them a glass of water if they knocked on my door that late. I would tell them to bugger off and even if I were home alone I'd start calling out my imaginary DH "John! John! Will you come to the door please? Come here!"

Original poster
Debbiep11 · 21/06/2022 23:33

All ready good points. Thanks. My son doesnt even use a mobile only his laptop so not sure how he would post any pics online.
I cant afford anything like cctv maybe a cheap one. Will have to do some research tomorrow to see what is available I think.
I will speak to the school tomorrow to see if theh have noticed anything and will also go through his laptop with a fine tooth comb as well I think.
I would feel silly contscting 101 just for this I think but will have a think about it.
The bi comment and kiss thing was definitely weird I thought. And very nerve wracking since he is only 13 and a very young 13 at that as well.
Some sort of cctv might be beneficial though though if not too expensive

OP posts:
SunflowerGardens · 21/06/2022 23:37

It sounds like they've been told a bit of commonly known local info about your family ie your sons name and used it to try and get into your house to get a look around at what they can rob.

AmaryIlis · 21/06/2022 23:43

Did they actually know your son's name?

Original poster
Debbiep11 · 21/06/2022 23:44

Sunflowergardens
I am just nervous about how they got my address to be honest. There were 4 of them as well hanging out outside the house.
I think I will have to have a serious conversation with my son tomorrow after school about this. Find out if anything did happen at school recently that could be linked to this.

OP posts:
Oceanus · 21/06/2022 23:46

There are cameras that record to an external hard drive (which your kid should have), you don't need to pay extra every month, and you can watch online too, you just need to link it to your wifi when you set it up. Do the maths and good luck.
Btw is your kid's school close to your house? Is it within walking distance or just a short bus ride away? If so, I think it would easier for them to follow your kid home than to get his info online, potentially be miles away, and travel all the way to your house without being sure whether your kid had given them the right address or whether your kid is for real (and told them the truth). Does that make sense?
I'd go to the kid's school. Get there super early and wait for all the kids to get dropped off or picked up. I wouldn't be surprised to recognise them.
Next time you leave the house pretend to talk to sb who's inside, if sb's watching, they won't risk anything.

Summercally · 21/06/2022 23:51

Amazon do a ring doorbell that’s reasonably priced. If anything it may act as a deterrent. Sorry you are going through this.

Original poster
Debbiep11 · 21/06/2022 23:53

Thanks for your input. I drive my son to school and pick him up so there is no way they could have followed us. Especially from the secondary school as it's a good 40 minute walk from the house.
Good suggestion about sitting at the school earlier to see if I can spot them though . Thanks

OP posts:
SunflowerGardens · 21/06/2022 23:55

Debbiep11 · 21/06/2022 23:44

Sunflowergardens
I am just nervous about how they got my address to be honest. There were 4 of them as well hanging out outside the house.
I think I will have to have a serious conversation with my son tomorrow after school about this. Find out if anything did happen at school recently that could be linked to this.

If they're burgling rather than bullying they'll be scouting out every house in the neighbourhood. Maybe ask the police have there been other incidents like this or robberies in the area.

BlankTimes · 21/06/2022 23:57

I'd consider keeping your son at home tomorrow, just in case the unknown group of lads have spread a load of rumours about him being bi and kissing a boy to kids in his school.

I'd have a word with whoever is the school safguarding led and tell them exactly what happened last night and ask how they intend to keep your son safe in school.

BlankTimes · 21/06/2022 23:58

School Safeguarding Lead

Stillfunny · 22/06/2022 00:01

I have gone back to getting an old fashioned door chain on my front door. Avoids the element of surprise where they could just push past you. Unlikely they will try this again as they know you will be wary now. So sorry this has happened to you , must be very upsetting.

DuckBilledPlattyJoobs · 22/06/2022 00:03

BlankTimes · 21/06/2022 23:57

I'd consider keeping your son at home tomorrow, just in case the unknown group of lads have spread a load of rumours about him being bi and kissing a boy to kids in his school.

I'd have a word with whoever is the school safguarding led and tell them exactly what happened last night and ask how they intend to keep your son safe in school.

I think this is good advice. I wouldn’t send my DS back to school following this incident until I could talk to the school about what is going on.