How do you prevent work stresses impacting your home life?

[MindFlayer]

I work in a customer relations type role which in a nutshell is complaints. This is 98% negativity, day after day. Some people will accept that you have resolved their complaint for them and actually acknowledge your work in doing so, the majority not.
I appreciate for the most part, we are just the face of the company and the verbal/written attacks aren’t personal but I’m only human and 8/9 hours a day for 5 days out of 7, it does affect my mental health.

Today for example, I had the most awful man who had been equally as abusive to most of my colleagues but he was genuinely horrid. He said the most derogatory things and only in hindsight (which is a wonderful thing as we know) do I wish I had dealt with him differently. We obviously have to adhere to policies which require us to remain impartial but to also be firm and offer warnings should anybody display abusive behaviour and although I implemented that to an extent, I now wish that i had been more assertive.

I have now finished work and I just feel dreadful. So mentally tired and so down about my job. Usually I’m quite good at switching off but some days I just feel mentally exhausted by it.

Any tips to make me feel better?

I used to take the commute home to read, it would provide a mental break that would help my brain switch off from my work day. I did find that I had to choose my books carefully, very easy to read chick lit..think Danielle Steel and Jane Green stuff. If you WFH, can you designate a half hour for just adjusting time?

Yes I work from home so I think that contributes too because there’s no clear separation in environments.
Funny you should mention reading, I read a lot! Not too much lighthearted reading though so may give that a try 😊

I’ve retired now but worked in a very stressful role where I was more often than not the baddie and dealt with some pretty horrendous incidents on a daily basis. I used my 45 minute commute home to decompress and switch my thought patterns. Also, find something fairly mundane to do on arrival home before you engage in family life. Water the garden? Have a bath? Candy Crush, lol?
Make a division between work and home….you can start afresh of an evening.

I go for a walk before and after I finish work (I wfh) as I find it helps compartmentalise the working day, and get into home mode, bit like commuting but with none of the transport stress!

Yes I think it’s those tasks that help with the transition from work mode into home mode. I do try and those those things but it’s more letting go of the negativity of the day that I struggle with. I suppose that’s a thought management process as opposed to a physical task though. Just haven’t mastered it yet 😂

I found making a clear divide between work and home helped with an activity between finishing work and getting home; I’d go to the gym after work before I had DC or even to the shop or something and now I try to do a short walk especially if I’ve been working from home

I have a shower as soon as I get in from work. Or immediately after dinner if needing to cook and feed the children. Then change into comfy pjs and that's my work mode off home mode on. I mentally feel like the shower washes the work vibes away. I do this even when I wfh because I realised that I didn't switch off without it.

Have an activity to look forward to doing etc, so it takes your mind of x issues.

I WFH, I try to finish on time as much as possible, turn everything off right away then either walk my dog and plug in a podcast or do a workout at home.
This time of year I potter in the garden too, growing some veg that need talking to.
Then cook dinner and watch something mindless on Netflix.

An activity- distraction seems to be the most recommended, I will definitely look at that especially something I would enjoy doing. I tend to finish work and then launch straight into cooking dinner, catching up with DC/DH and generally trying to navigate the home chaos/jobs! I think if I tried to fit in even a short activity that I looked forward to, I could also treat it as a reward for the end of the day.