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Original poster

How common are fatal car accidents?

54 replies

BubblegumBlu · 21/06/2022 15:34

I’m looking at finally learning to drive, but I can’t decide whether it’s worth the risk when I have a young DC. My DH lost his mum in a crash when he was very young and the thought of leaving my DC alone like that is terrifying!

My parents always drove and never had any kind of accident, and nobody that I know personally has ever had anything more than a small bump, even the reckless ones. Car crashes seem to always be the culprit when somebody’s parents die on tv though, and there’s something like a 1 in 250 chance of dying in a car crash. It sounds really high when you think of it like that, especially compared to most other causes of death.

I know that that number includes drunk drivers, young boy racers, reckless idiots in general. Does anyone know much about the real statistics for sober, careful parent in a 5 star safety rated car? I don’t have anyone to talk about this in real life, because everyone I know seems to have no worries at all about it.

OP posts:

Sofasogood1 · 21/06/2022 15:41

A quick Google says around 1850 people a year die in car accidents so 0.2 per cent of all deaths.

Five people a day in a car accident, 460 of cancer. So not common

Cas112 · 21/06/2022 15:45

OP you cant live your life not doing things as mundane as driving because your worried about dying.

picklemewalnuts · 21/06/2022 15:54

Bear in mind that nothing happens in a vacuum. There are dangers to pedestrians, dangers to people on trains...

I think maybe you really want to consider whether car owners are more likely to die young than people who don't own cars.

Generally I'd say that being able to drive enriches your life, allows wider range of holidays, more flexibility with days out, where you live and what jobs you can apply for. Certainly that's why I encouraged my DC to drive. My DH is a non driver.

Sharrowgirl · 21/06/2022 16:04

You could be in a car crash even if you’re not driving one.

The benefits of driving far outweigh the risks.

Lipsandlashes · 21/06/2022 16:06

If you have this level of anxiety then driving isn't for you.

Pootles34 · 21/06/2022 16:09

OP I do get where you're coming from - I learnt to drive at 30, it is terrifying especially as a parent. However you're much safer than a 17 year old who thinks they're immortal!

Honestly as well, you can't protect your kids from everything. You just can't! You'll have to deal with them going off on their own as teenagers, riding their bikes on roads, then eventually driving themselves. There is always a risk, but if you don't do anything with a risk you won't really be living will you? It sounds trite but it's true. Get out of your comfort zone and get driving!

retiredtrafficcop · 21/06/2022 16:20

if you have this level of anxiety, leave the driving to others

PatriciaHolm · 21/06/2022 16:26

I don’t have anyone to talk about this in real life, because everyone I know seems to have no worries at all about it.

That's because they are being rational about it, and in reality, you are not.

Original poster

BubblegumBlu · 21/06/2022 16:27

Pootles34 · 21/06/2022 16:09

OP I do get where you're coming from - I learnt to drive at 30, it is terrifying especially as a parent. However you're much safer than a 17 year old who thinks they're immortal!

Ahh thanks for the encouragement! Does it get any easier with time?

My DH won’t even get in a car and we don’t have any family to help with lifts so I know I really need to get it done before DS starts needing someone to run him around to different clubs and friends houses😬

OP posts:

DaniCalifornication · 21/06/2022 16:28

I've lost my grandma and cousin both to car accidents (not the same one) my grandma was killed by a drink driver (I hope he burns for eternity in hell) and I lost my cousin due to her being a young driver and losing control on a blind bend crossing the centre line and colliding with an oncoming car.

Original poster

BubblegumBlu · 21/06/2022 16:30

Sharrowgirl · 21/06/2022 16:04

You could be in a car crash even if you’re not driving one.

The benefits of driving far outweigh the risks.

You mean as a pedestrian? I was surprised to see that those numbers were even higher than that of car crashes, which was kind of encouraging

OP posts:

Original poster

BubblegumBlu · 21/06/2022 16:32

DaniCalifornication · 21/06/2022 16:28

Sorry to hear that, some people are so selfish. Do you drive yourself now?

OP posts:

PineForestsAndSunshine · 21/06/2022 16:35

You have to treat percentages with caution. I don't know how reliable your statistic is, but you have a 250 in 250 chance of dying from something, so 1 in 250 doesn't seem unreasonable - especially when you factor in that it includes pedestrian fatalities and varies greatly by age of driver, location, etc.

Irrational fears don't respond well to logic though.

Is this definitely just a fear of driving/cars? If you weren't afraid of driving, is there anything you would find it harder to avoid?

Lavender2021 · 21/06/2022 16:45

If you do learn to drive please look into car seats. Rear facing is the safest way to travel and you can easily get to 6 year's old unless super high percentiles or longer if low percentiles. Also use a high back booster seat until 150cm like Europe does not just a booster seat as they have no side protection . The UK has terrible car seat laws.

Londontown12 · 21/06/2022 16:48

I know your fear!!!! I only passed my driving test at 35 or 36 same reason ! But I’ve happily been driving for the last 11 years no problem ! And life is so much better and easier with children ! Now my oldest drives lol ! And youngest ready to take driving test ! Go for it !!!! X

SomePosters · 21/06/2022 16:50

I didn’t learn to drive until after I had dd as I had a friend who died in a car accident at 17 (inexperienced driver, no drink just a cornering speed misjudgment that killed 4 teens and a mum and 4 kids)

Then I had a child with mobility issues and needed to face my fears

I broke down in tears in more than 1 lesson and needed a lot to get through the process.

I have been driving for nearly ten years now and I’m confident and enjoy both the driving and the freedom it gives us.

Gently encourage your DH to therapy before his issues become your childrens.

AG1210 · 21/06/2022 16:55

I don't have any exact figures op, but I'm sure google would bring you answers but please do not try to fret and read over statistics.

I used to have major car crash anxiety, it came tears after I passed my test though, when I had dc. I used to have sleepless nights looking at statistics, not wanting to drive anywhere particularly without dc thinking I could leave them behind. Thankfully it did not affect my driving ability, I have never been a nervous driver. It was just the obsession with the statistics. But my anxiety has improved a lot and I'm not so fearful as I was.

my anxiety about it will never go away, but I am learning to live with it and for me driving is very beneficial - I live rurally with no public transport.

The risk is of a fatal car crash is extremely low, of course it could happen as you know with your partners mum which is really sad but roads have got safer, cars are generally safer, kids car seats are safer these days but sometimes the most expensive isn't always the best, it's good to do some research first.

knowing I am a safe and alert driver which helps me overcome my anxiety. I can't control what other drivers but I am always alert and safe.

even if you didn't learn to drive, I am sure you aren't going to avoid vehicles forever so why not do it yourself? I hate being a passenger and much more relaxed as the driver.

CredibilityProblem · 21/06/2022 16:57

Mile per mile you're much safer inside a car than walking (bus or train would be safer still). Of course the immediate risks of walking are off-set by the long term benefits of physical exercise, because it reduces the risks of cancer, heart disease, diabetes, osteoporosis and dementia which are far far bigger killers.

As a car driver or passenger on a UK road today you're probably in the safest place and time for private transport that there's ever been. The UK roads are some of the safest in the world, tying with Scandinavia, beaten only by a few tiny island countries with no cars, and they've got far safer over the last few decades.

BertieBotts · 21/06/2022 17:12

Much rarer in modern cars. Have a look at the NCAP crash tests on youtube or some of the videos about airbags and crash test dummies. Car technology has improved a lot at protecting drivers in particular.

Always wear your seatbelt, never drink drive or text and drive, buy as modern a car as you can afford and do a defensive driving course if you like. Most driving deaths that I see in the news seem to be related to speed and drink/drug driving.

I think it's used as a convenient reason for people to die on TV, partly because people's perceptions of how common things are are always a bit out of date and it was more common in the past, and partly because it's a death which seems ordinary but not related to age. If they had a character who died in an unusual way like being murdered or a freak accident, it's hard for that not to be a plot point when they might just want the character conveniently out of the way. It also means you can conveniently kill off two characters at once whereas things like cancer, heart attacks etc don't usually strike both members of a couple at once.

I only know one person who died in a car accident. He was a pedestrian on a rural road at dusk and the driver didn't see him.

carefullycourageous · 21/06/2022 17:14

I don't think dying in a car crash is statistically likely but cars are very unhealthy and there are myriad health and financial benefits to not owning one.

So overall I would say don't bother, but not for the reason of dying in a crash.

BertieBotts · 21/06/2022 17:16

And I know several people who have been involved in car crashes - none of them died or were even seriously injured. Our car was hit by a HGV when I was at primary school, we kids weren't in car seats, not even boosters (as was normal at the time), car a complete write off, my mum got whiplash but my sister and I just cuts and bruises! It was a scary experience, but far from the worst thing that has ever happened.

Irishfarmer · 21/06/2022 17:19

Learn to drive, even if you don't buy a car immediately it will open up a lot of options to you. Where I live would be very difficult without a car.

museumum · 21/06/2022 17:19

Your DH probably needs some professional help with his trauma and grief. Does he get buses or taxis ever? How does he get about?

SausageAndCash · 21/06/2022 17:25

there’s something like a 1 in 250 chance of dying in a car crash

More like 1 in 50,000 by my admittedly bad maths.

Singleandproud · 21/06/2022 17:26

Learn to drive, it's a good skill to have I'm glad I learnt as an adult and once you pass your test you don't have to get a car. Then, when you decide you want one just take a few refresher lessons before taking off on your own.

I learnt after being first on scene to an accident where the driver had had a stroke at the wheel and went into a HGV, it put me off for a while and as a single parent I had very similar thoughts to you when I did learn. However I passed 7 years ago and it's opened up opportunities for DD, she's been able to compete in her chosen sports across the country and its opened up employment opportunities for me as I can job search over a wider area.

The only bumps and scratches I've had are due to my own poor spatial awareness and my driveway gates, I removed them after the second time of hitting them 😳.

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