Hoping for any hints and tips about how to manage the mental workload and also manage the jealousy towards DP that he is able to just focus on one thing at a time and get jobs done.
Background- DH works M-F in a 9-6 job but is an hour drive away. We have been renovating our house for the last few years (nothing major, house is totally livable but everything is >25 years old and coming to the end of its lifespan) so he tries to get what he can done on the weekends.
Me- Currently on mat leave with an EBF 17 week old baby who won't take a bottle (probably because by the time we were able to try with DP when he came home from work she is totally losing her shit and just wants mum). I am a GP registrar, pre-mat leave working 8.30-6 with an hour drive each way on top, lots of exams, portfolio work and hoop jumping to get through for my training, plus the ever increasing demands of working in primary care.
Baby came 2 weeks before due date so I still have stuff that I was supposed to have done in the mat leave that I started at 38 weeks before she was supposed to arrive! I'm struggling to get anything done and feeling so overwhelmed with the list of things that is constantly going around in my head. To add to my workload we've also made the decision to get rid of our cleaner of 2 years due to rising cost of living, my reduction in pay due to mat leave and we had been talking about it for a while as we weren't entirely happy with her work. I'm managing to keep on top of housework, washing and the immediate issues (mostly baby related) but nothing else.
I have no idea how to get anything done. The baby only wants to be with me by the time DP gets home from work (she is fine with him in the day), she feeds every 2 hours max in the day and will totally lose her shit and become inconsolable very quickly so I can't even get out of the house without her.
I'm just so jealous of DH. He is such a perfectionist and he spends hours researching things for the house. TBF to him, it always looks nice but I don't know if I care enough about coat hooks for him to have spent hours looking at them online and still not made a decision. I'd love to be able to get lost in a task like that but I just can't as as soon as I start something the baby cries or wants a feed. DP also doesn't do any DIY or project work other than research in the week after work, TBF he does cook dinner and usually has to tidy up too as I am busy with the baby, so to say improvements are going slowly is an understatement and I am fed up of living with building materials lying around.
DH has agreed that we can throw some of our savings at improving the house, but we have struggled with getting in tradesmen due to how busy everyone is currently.
Any tips for how to do it? I'm just making list after list to try to remember what I need to do and prioritise but by the time I have written the list the baby is awake and crying.