Am I being a bit over cautious, DD 15 babysitting job...

[sendwineandastraw]

DD has been asked to babysit by a mutual acquaintance of my husband.

the couple have 3 children ranging from 1 to about 12.

My DD is 15 and while loves children and the only baby sitting experience she has is with her sister who is 9...

I just don’t feel comfortable her being left with so much responsibility and am leaning to saying no on her behalf but wondering if I’m being over cautious and this is how most teenagers make some extra pocket money...

How long is the babysitting for? What time of day/evening? Basically, I would assume it’s fine, especially if the baby is in bed asleep. Does she know the children?

I would see if she can meet the children prior to the actual babysitting if possible and also meet parents for a chat about routine, bedtimes, what to do if the youngest wakes up etc. Just things that could come up that if the parents are rushing out they might not get a chance to discuss.

I think it is probably the 12 yo that is more of an issue than the younger ones if they are asleep. The gap between a 12yo and a 15yo is not big enough for the 12yo to see the 15yo as 'in charge', especially if she knows your DD well. This could be very difficult for your DD depending on what is expected of her. Would the 12yo do as she is told by your DD? Is she likely to get a bit bigheaded and get silly or wind the smaller DCs up, leaving your DD to cope with the fallout etc?

We have met them a couple of time and tbh it all seems a bit chaotic (in a normal kind of busy young family way) there is baby, preschooler and then a girl slightly older who I think might have additional needs. (mutual friend mentioned to DH)

it would be evening, and I think home by midnight....

I think it’s fine, really. Does your DD want to do it? It should be up to her. If there’s a problem, could she ring you or the parents to help sort it, if really necessary?

Can your DD take a friend and split the payment?
I think that unless the 12 year old is going to be difficult about it, there's sufficient age gap to have a degree of authority as the older child.
I would want the kids to have met your DD before hand.

Let her do it once to see how it goes. During that time be available and let her know she can call you for help.

See how it goes she may surprise you!

Don't stop her she will resent you!

To be fair DD doesn’t even know about this year and very unlikely to find out unless we told her.

Thanks for all the input will discuss again with my DH. 😊

If your DD wants to do it go for it. My DD15 has had a couple of babysitting jobs over the last couple of years. She struggles in a lot of areas but has always been great with younger children and frankly thrives. On the occasions she has done it she has been great - caring, sensible and has really stepped up in terms of responsibility. If she is good with kids it would be a yes from me.'

I'd want more details on the possible additional needs.

From a parent of a young child perspective we only once left our 0-3 year olds with a younger teen (when 18yr old wasn’t available, her 15 yr old sister filled in) but we were literally in the same road so I felt like the risk was minimal. She had done first aid training and I always had them asleep before we left.

I once babysat a 3 month old as a 14 year old. Baby cried the whole time (probably hungry!) whilst I rocked him. It was definitely out of my depth!

So I think it does depend on the exact circumstances.