What would you do with the stuff if you had to clear a family members house

[T181]

Bit of a back story my nan passed last year and i loved her dearly but boy she was an almighty hoarder im not talking rubbish, its effectively 80 years of stuff crafts dolls house boating stuff furniture bedding memrobillia records clothes cds scrap materials sewing machines house items it goes on and on....There is currently a 1 bed bungalow, shed, garage, summer house and loft absolutely filled with stuff, nan lived with another finally member who still lives there and though we are slowly sorting it the other family member is also as much as a hoarder!
anyway so we are selling on Facebook next door giving stuff away for free or to charity, we havnt convinced family member to do a boot sale yet(which would help loads! But we have to tread carefully as its still their home )

But basically I've been told constantly over the last few weeks by my mum that if we don't start to sort it now then it'll be me left to sort it when they all pass. And that's why im currently awake at nearly 2am thinking what the f### am I going to do with it all! It does seem sinful to chuck it in the tip and now im just finding this so daunting to look at in the future, there is so much stuff and though some is worth money its not on Facebook or the time taking photos advertising ect like nans got this certain good quality wooden furniture that cost a lot of money when she brought it but its so heavy and old fashion now i don't think itll be worth that much, im hoping by the time hat something happens to family member in the future it'll already be cleared but i don't think it will because of their attitude also towards it all, and now its stressing me out so much, have you been in a situation like this what did you do ?

Husband says were just have to bring boxes at a time back to ours to sort it but last thing I want it is loads of stuff lumbering our house up something good is the house is outrightly owned so we won't have banks chasing for mortgage so will have time but even now im in bed in my house and my anxiety is playing up thinking about it all. I can see now why my mum is so stressed out about all the stuff even though I've told her numerous times its not her house so she shouldn't stress about it

Anyway would love some views please

I've reread your post op.

So there is a family member still in the house? A spouse? Do they mind you coming in and clearing out all this stuff? Do they lack capacity?

I think you need to be really sensitive in circumstances like this. It's can be incredibly upsetting to see a close family members possessions going like this. It's a piece of them and you need to tread lightly.

Is the hoarding situation dangerous? Why not leave most of it until this family member has left the home permanently?

Don't try to clear it while someone is still living there, not only is it stressing you out pushing a hoarder to clear stuff can make them worse.

Take anything you want sell anything high value (assuming that you are entitled to) and leave the rest. They want to live like that.

When the time comes and the house actually needs emptying, take anything sentimental or high value and get house clearance in for the rest.

@DuchessofAnkh22 You're absolutely right about the collections of figurines. We auctioned several collections. Royal Dalton ladies, and Toby jugs. Each collection sold for £30 max. The only furniture which was worth selling was Ercol teak stuff

Who are the Executors/Administrators of the Will? Primarily it's up to them to sort this - great if beneficiaries can do they fair share of the clearance alongside though. Ideally I'd say, let the beneficiaries have what they want. If whoever is dealing with estates, thinks there's anything of any value, try selling second hand or get an antique dealer in. After that some items to charity, skips and clearance. Charities may be interested in furniture if it's of a reasonable quality.

When clearing my mums house
We put anything we hoped had any value in one room, & had it valued.
He said the rest would go in a skip.
Interestingly it was the book shelve (1970s) system that he said was the most valuable!

I suggest emptying the loft first, the remaining occupant wont want to keep stuff they cant even see or get to

Why is your mum saying it'll be your responsibility?

How are you separating your nan's things from the other resident's?

Clear docs/papers, jewellery and valuables to go through if you are the executor.
With hobby stuff we contacted and donated sportswear to his local team to either sell or reuse for their open days.
Took knitting needles, wool and new art materials to our local senior residents home for their residents to enjoy and some to our local brownie pack.
Donated blankets and pet accessories to RSPCA.
Donated gardening stuff to his local allotment association.
It takes time though and is faster to hire a clearance company to deal with it if it needs to be done quickly

Go in, take what you want, then shut the doors and get house clearance in.

The financial cost of something at the time of purchase has no relation to its current value to you now. Do not worry about a single mass produced item.

We did this with my DGMs home and it took nearly a year of weekends. We went through everything for anything personal, gave away what we could, put stuff in a skip and got a house clearance company for the rest. Huge house, 2 sheds, and a garage.

If you've got craft stuff local groups might be interested or sell on Ebay or facebook.

Please dont take it home. Unless its bits you want to keep. From my experience of taking stuff home you just keep it then and you need your home to be free of it to keep you same.

It is a big job. It's good if you can get friends into help so you can through it all in a week at most.

Is the person left in the house a spouse? I think this is important from a legal point of view.

Honestly, the house clearance company we paid to clear my mother’s house is some of the best money we’ve ever spent.
There’s a mess of emotion when sorting through hoarded belongings, which is why hoarders become hoarders.
Be kind to yourself and be clear to anyone involved that if they don’t sort it now, you won’t sort it later.

Start with the stuff that the live-in relative won't have an interest in..like the craft equipment. You could put it on Freecycle or Olio or even ask friends of your nan if they'd like it ( maybe they've got similar interests?) Or find local craft groups and see if you can donate? There is a haberdashery shop near me that runs all sorts of craft sessions, maybe there's one near you that would be in touch with various knitters groups ec?

I had to clear my parents house and didn't have time or inclination (it was also 80 miles away) to spend huge amounts of time on the process.
First my brother and I went through and gathered up every bit of paperwork and boxed that up.
Then we divided up stuff we both particularly wanted.
Then identified everything that might have actual value but we didn't want and needed to be valued and possibly sold. Boxed it up.
Then things that one of us knew for sure that a charity would want, and we'd take responsibility for passing on.

Paperwork, things of value, and some bits I was unsure on all went to a storage unit near me.

Everything else the house clearance dealt with, and it took days for them to clear it. Anything they weren't sure of, they put to one side to check

Nothing came into my actual house unless I had decided I was going to keep it, and I sat for a couple of hours at a time in my storage unit and sorted through the paperwork/ photos/stuff.

My colleague is currently clearing her parents house after they went into care and has done the same as she saw how efficient a process it was, and didn't leave me with a house full of stuff people 'might' want. Its a terrible, painful process none the less though

We are doing this with pils house. Mil still alive. Fil now deceased was a hoarder. We have made £22000 for mil by selling his crap. Broken acorn electron computers, old corgi cars, croquet sets, musical instruments, sheepskin jackets...but it has taken two years and we have done about a third of it. It's stressful and infuriating and I wouldn't do it again

Been thinking about this today as the chap over the road has died and there is a skip on the drive today. It saddens me that peoples precious things are often just thrown away, although they obviously wouldnt know ! I will be using a clearance firm for my own home as Ive no relatives and its quite distressing thinking all the things about your home you love will just be sold off or junked.Things that are precious to the home owner often mean nothing to the family unless there are particular heirlooms. Its sad

Front 'yard' sale advertised only on Next Door so that neighbours and local people can easily pick up stuff?

nextdoor.co.uk

Sold it on eBay got £70k for stuff everyone else wanted to bin. Took about a year

Craft stuff - especially the vintage stuff - sells very very well in charity shops. I would just sort everything into piles.

1. Sentimental items or things someone in the family might want. Give relatives a deadline by which they must collect or put dibs on what they want.
2. Larger items of furniture - sell, or donate to charity.
3. Charity shop pile - clothing and other textiles, books, craft stuff, bric a brac.
4. Stuff for the tip/recycling.

Could you advertise a house clearance sale? People can come and take what they want and pay a few quid?

I have been clearing out my parents’ house.

I gave away the white goods, clothes banked the clothes, books went to charity shops and pretty much everything else went to the dump and skips.

Streets to homes were good when my dad found himself homeless through no fault of his own. The little room they found him was dire but he would have had a roof over his head.

Luckily I found him a better little studio flat and he was fine but he had nothing to start out with and it's stupid things like teaspoons that you don't think of.

He donated them a lot of clothes and stuff in thanks and they said they are always desperate for donations in good condition but always tend to get stuff that is falling apart or filthy that they then have to pay to dispose of.

The sort of stuff that you are talking about, I think they would be grateful for. Clean clothing, kitchen stuff in good clean condition, bedding especially is expensive when you have literally pennies to your name and an empty flat.

Furniture I'm not sure if they would want but I listed a few things free on Facebook like a solid wooden cot, a single bed, small kitchen table, fridge etc and given them to the first person who was polite.

The first 2 were both people moving into their first home with not much money and a lot to get so they were pretty grateful for it and were happy to collect. It's really hard for people in that situation and takes a lot of stress off their shoulders. The girl with the cot (and she was a girl, barely 17 and on her own) burst into tears when I gave her the little key thing to put it together with because it was just another thing she didn't have to worry about.

Homeless charities will take most things off your hands because they literally need EVERYTHING.

Thank you just to clarify the family member says they are also eager to clear it but arnt tech savy to sell online hence its left me to and my parents /siblings(however deep down sometimes I don't think they do want to sort it out )
Family member is still living there and will be i was just talking mainly in the future when it's left to me to sort out