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Original poster

Is it better to live in a big house?

140 replies

rosiesunflower · 09/06/2022 11:32

We've sold our small house and ended up renting a big house. We'll big to us anyway.
I feel so much more relaxed and calm. I have space for the first time. I get all the extra cleaning and things like that but overall the space is outweighing anything else.

We're now looking to buy again and everything has changed about what we thought we wanted in our next home. I feel like I can never go back to a small house again. Has anyone gone from a smaller house to a bigger one and regretted it? I'm talking quite a large house ie 4000 sq ft plus. Our house we sold was 1000sq ft! I suppose it would be very long term purchase. We only have one primary aged dc.

OP posts:
strawberrybarn · 09/06/2022 11:36

Are you sure you've got your sizes correct? I live in a big 4 bed detached, which is 1629 sq. foot!

TeenPlusCat · 09/06/2022 11:38

I've no idea on square feet, but it is nice having the space to get away from other family members when needed.

emsyj37 · 09/06/2022 11:41

Our house is 2400 sq ft and it feels just right, although I would like an extra room to use as a gym.... 4000 sq ft sounds huge,is it a big period house? The energy bills and maintenance costs for a home that size would concern me. But you do quickly get used to having space so YANBU to not want to give it up.

Holmgang · 09/06/2022 11:41

IME you start off with lots of lovely extra space but then you fill it!

Mine is no longer calm and airy but full of stuff. I do have four children though. I’m quite ruthless with outgrown stuff but it just kind of creeps up on you -someone gives you a massive puppet theatre that their dc have outgrown because you have loads of room, someone else gives you a sack of clothes for the dc to grow into, you buy a lamp and a plant… before you know it you have big rooms full of stuff that are a nightmare to clean. I dream of my lovely 2 up 2 down that had hardly anything in it!

Ruthietuthie · 09/06/2022 11:42

We live in a really big house (5000 plus sq ft) although as we live in the US it is less unusual. It is just me, my husband and one child. I LOVE the extra space - large rooms, extra rooms (room for an office for me, room for a guest suite). Whenever I go back to my parents' place in the UK I find the small rooms really stress-provoking. My childhood bedroom was a box room that would have fitted a double (not queen) bed if you had dropped it in from the ceiling. The lack of space, lack of storage (my mum always said I was untidy - now I see clearly that I just didn't have adequate storage for even the small amount of stuff I had), and above all lack of privacy (being able to hear every sound from every room, and from the neighbors) is something I would now find impossible to live with. I love all the extra space I have now.

mindutopia · 09/06/2022 11:42

Ours is about 3500 sq ft I think, which is quite big. Obviously, I like it (it's a very lovely house). I mean I think yes, a bigger house is nicer, if you can afford it and it's not just you bumbling around in there, though out of reach for many people. When we first moved here, I found I was doing about an extra 6000 steps a day just because I was walking from one side to the other and up and down stairs more.

EvenMoreFuriousVexation · 09/06/2022 11:46

In all honesty, I wouldn't want to make a decision until after experiencing at least one winter's energy bills.

Badger1970 · 09/06/2022 11:47

We live in a large 4 bed detached and we've filled it with crap and clutter. I'm having a massive cull when our last DC moves out later this year.

parietal · 09/06/2022 11:48

a very big house can be too big to keep clean and it can be too easy to accumulate junk.

but up to 3000sq ft is probably a 'generous family home'. so it entirely depends what you mean by big.

also, a few big rooms can feel bigger than having lots of small rooms.

whenwillthemadnessend · 09/06/2022 11:54

My house takes ages to Hoover but a cordless helps and one Hoover upstairs and one down really helps.

but it's easier to clean as we have more storage space and less crap everywhere so swings and roundabouts.

Mushroo · 09/06/2022 11:58

4,000 square feet is huge!! Make sure you factor in costs to heat, maintain, furnish, council tax.

A large 4 bed is usually 2,000 square feet or so.

Ruthietuthie · 09/06/2022 11:58

@parietal is right too. I think it is the size of each individual room that matters. Lots of smaller rooms still make me feel cramped and stressed. When I was looking for this house, I knew I wanted a sitting room with space for a grand piano and space for my child to roller-skate. I wanted a bedroom that also had space for a sitting area, so the bedroom could be a real retreat. Space in itself is a luxury.

Boredsoentertainme · 09/06/2022 11:58

4000 is beyond a huge house, it’s footballer mansion size. Are you sure?

BadAtMaths2 · 09/06/2022 12:00

We moved from a 4 bed terrace (not that small in itself) to a 5 bed semi with a bigger garden. It's got much bigger rooms, large hallway, big reception rooms and kitchen diner.

I love the fact we can have 8 people for dinner and have room to walk round the table without people having to squeeze in awkwardly or have chairs right up against the wall. We can have dedicated study. We've tried quite hard to declutter (Dh would say we haven't - but it's not cluttered!). I love being able to walk around the side of the house. The garden isn't quite big enough - but we can sit out there and have people round and a BBQ and not have to rearrange the garden to all sit down.

It's more to clean - and tbh there's 2 rooms upstairs that are only used if we have a guest overflow - otherwise it's Christmas decorations.

It's a big house. And it's improved my feelings about being at home so much being in a bigger space.

We'll inevitably downsize at some point. And I've lived alone in a tiny house - which was perfect for me on my own at that time. And it was easy to keep clean and tidy.

JemimaHumdrum · 09/06/2022 12:05

The bigger the house the more things you have to fill it, the more cleaning, hoovering etc. I miss my tidy little house we had when we first married. Four kids later we have a large house but it’s full up with loads of ‘stuff’ hmph.
Although I suspect this thread is just a stealth boast about how big your house is.

Fere · 09/06/2022 12:05

One thing comes up straight away - much bigger heating bills. And they will go up and up.

shinynewapple22 · 09/06/2022 12:06

I live in a small house and have always thought I would hate a large house due to the extra cleaning.

However there is now just me and DH since DS moved out a couple of years ago I do like the extra space as previously we didn't even have a spare room.

I think it would be stressful to be overcrowded.

kickingupdaisies · 09/06/2022 12:06

We have about 1,000 3 bed. It's plenty, I wouldn't describe it as super small like you are, but big garden makes the difference, don't think I would cope with 4 X cleaning

Lacedwithgrace · 09/06/2022 12:46

We've lived in a smaller house and a bigger house than our current one and it's perfect. The bigger house had lots of small rooms that we couldn't use properly and lots of wasted space (One bathroom had the shower, loo and basin all on one wall and the rest of the room was empty). I like having all the storage we need- built in and walk in wardrobes/cupboards etc keep mess out of sight and having more space to walk around makes it more accessible to me.

JMAngel1 · 09/06/2022 13:06

This post is giving me comparison is the thief of joy vibes but feeling very touchy at the moment. I just turned 50 and thought that I would be in a much bigger house at this time in my life. We live in a 1200 sq ft 3 bed extended semi but upstairs bedrooms are very cramped and only 1 bathroom.
As my DDs get older, this is causing ructions!
Very petty of me but by my stage in life, I thought I would have an en-suite and possibly a dressing room/area. My dream is a proper dressing table - I currently sit on the floor in front of a lean to mirror to do my face in the morning. As I get older, the cramp in my legs is real on standing 😥
Feeling quite down about it all but we couldn’t afford a larger house in our area - we would have to uproot ours and our DDs lives to do that which I just couldn’t bring myself to do. I know how awful loneliness can be and we are so settled and happy with friends and family. Swings and roundabouts.

Stressybetty · 09/06/2022 13:14

We've always lived in small rentals, terrace or semi detached. Been living in a large detached family home temporarily for various reasons for the past 2 years and I don't think we could ever go back to non detached now if we can. Not the extra space particularly but the freedom of not being overlooked and separation from the neighbours is amazing.

byvirtue · 09/06/2022 13:24

We went from a 3 bed to a 7 bed (5000+sqft) property. We both work from home and love having all the space. No plans to downsize until late retirement.

That being said there are rooms we almost never go into for instance one sitting room we use in the summer as it’s freezing in winter. We have so many bathrooms it makes insuring the house difficult (and expensive). Because of the sqft everything costs more than a normal house (obviously!)weve found the cost of replacing flooring for instance to be eye watering. It’s also like the forth bridge there is always something needing painting or replacing.

As for cleaning it’s not that much extra our cleaner does 4 hours a week. if rooms aren’t getting used consistently they don’t get dirty. Quick dust and a hoover every couple of months seems sufficient.

I never dreamed I would live in such a lovely house so I enjoy it while it lasts. With the way things are going I just hope we can afford to keep it!

User76745333 · 09/06/2022 13:26

My house is big big - just over 5000 square feet. Its nice in many ways and we are lucky that it has large airy light rooms but I find myself having to yell to get the DC to come downstairs plus its expensive to heat and always seems like it needs cleaning.

I think with the rapidly increasing costs of running a home, people will start to look at smaller properties again.

womaninatightspot · 09/06/2022 13:30

Holmgang · 09/06/2022 11:41

IME you start off with lots of lovely extra space but then you fill it!

Mine is no longer calm and airy but full of stuff. I do have four children though. I’m quite ruthless with outgrown stuff but it just kind of creeps up on you -someone gives you a massive puppet theatre that their dc have outgrown because you have loads of room, someone else gives you a sack of clothes for the dc to grow into, you buy a lamp and a plant… before you know it you have big rooms full of stuff that are a nightmare to clean. I dream of my lovely 2 up 2 down that had hardly anything in it!

This. I moved in my 4 bed period farmhouse with a few suitcases (had been living abroad now it's choke full of stuff, I also have four children who all need to be forced to clear stuff out. It's coming up for 10 years though

LemonSwan · 09/06/2022 13:31

We went from a standard two and half bed semi to a 2500ft 3 bed. That’s nearly double the space.

It was a full Reno so we live in the garage - only 500ft for everything! Super king bed, two sofas, study, dining table, kitchen and all storage.

I actually have really enjoyed it. Thought it would annoy me but it’s really handy as we have a newborn and always in the same room so can get on with life without checking other rooms constantly or disturbing him to take him somewhere else.

The house is this weird concept now! We look out the window at this huge house and it doesn’t feel like our house yet. Just a random house in the garden. The garage really feels like our home.