How do you keep older kids entertained over the summer holidays?

[LabradorsInThePond]

It used to be so easy when they were younger- holiday camp,stay with grandparents, zoo trips, beach, paddling pool. Job done!

I’m finding it harder to know how to do it ‘right’. Too old for many activities, too young to be left to sort it out. Grandparents are now not up to helping much. Easter was a disaster. DD didn’t feel confident to attend a residential camp we’d booked and she felt lonely, with her emotional well-being really suffering. She’s still quite fragile at the moment.

I want to get it right this summer and would just like some ideas about things to do, or how to structure our time ( I won’t be working, we have enough but not limitless money). They both have some needs which affect their confidence to do things like residential camps, or big day camps. Unfortunately, they just aren’t the sort of kids I can just leave somewhere new with a packed lunch and collect 6 hours later.

So far, I’ve thought of:
Camping ( just the three of us, but local so DD can have a friend visit)
Bushcraft activities for DS
Cooking course for me and DD
Golf activities for DS
Friends to stay and camp with them in the garden
Local wildlife trust activities/ archaeology family days

Any ideas would be really welcome.

How old are your DCs?
Visits to National Trust properties are still a hit with my Dcs who are 11 & 15.

I don't know your DC obvs, but honestly don't over-programme. It's really good for them to entertain themselves (we have strict ish screentime limits so that doesn't just turn into constant screentime). Between school and clubs etc kids can end up living very regulated managed-by-adults lives in term time so it's good to have a break.

What a great thread. I feel we career between over and under organising…. This summer I thought we’d try and have a bit more rhythm to the holidays - do the beach, NT, big walk and picnic, museum or town trip. Mine are 12 and 13, so going to involve them more in the planning. They’ve both got into running over the Easter hols, so going to try to keep that going. One is keen on golf, so going to try to do that all together - I’d love to learn and DD is slowly warming up to the idea. We’ll go to the range a couple of times a weekend and try to play each week too - there is a really good municipal course not far from us. Just thinking that we could play tennis once a week too. I find it really exhausting when I arrange too many play dates as s d up driving in different directions.

MP for ideas

How old are they? How about focussing on learning new stuff at home? Ds1 cooks most days in the holidays trying out a whole variety of different style foods. Coding or sewing are other good ideas though. Both dc also take on more responsibility and get paid not just to cut our lawn and other jobs at home but also do jobs for grandparents.

Dog walks with picnics are still popular as is swimming and watching/ playing sport.

What stage are your DS and DD?

I would talk to them about what they would like to do. In our house over the holidays we did/do things like:

Gardening/cooking/DIY
Board games or at home escape/mystery games
Walks/runs/bike rides
Tennis/swimming
Trips on the train or to local places
Buy a day bus ticket and roam our area

Kids also did things on their own such as:

Coding
Watching films
Art/drawing/craft/other making
Cooking

We left plenty of time unprogrammed because it is important to learn to fill their own time more and more, you have to therefore leave gaps for them to get a bit bored to inspire them to think of something to do. Boredom is an important part of the creative process!

Some of your activities sound externally organised and these can be less good for developing independence. There might be scope to just do some cooking with you, rather than do a cooking course, for example. This would give the kids more creative input which would then lead to them being better able to decide to cook something on their own.

Also maybe I am reading too much into it but why bushcraft for your DS and cooking for your DD? Get them both cooking and both doing some bushcraft.

11 & 13 wiil sort themselves out as I work

Watching with interest! Mine are 14 and 17. 17 yr old is pretty sussed, but still I’d like to do stuff with them both. 14 has retreated into a massive online shell and I cannot get him off it - he can’t see what else there is to do - and I’m coming up blank. Everything I suggest he says no to. I just feel all suggested out after doing this for 17 years! Dh works all the time and is knackered at weekends so it’s always been down to me and I’ve not always had the energy to do stuff like camping and hiking. Just do not know what to do with him/ them. There seem to be some nice ideas on here.

Can't they entertain themselves most days, with a few friends over and trips out over the course of the holidays? It's good for kids to be bored to a certain degree, they need to figure out how to be their own company and how to motivate themselves to find something to do. (Obviously not if they're very little, but I sense yours are at least pre-teen?)

We're away for 2 weeks on holiday, but the other 4 weeks we're working so they'll have to sort themselves out.
Trips to cinemas with mates
Buses into town
Walks with friends
Gym with friends
(Tbf they rarely want to do much with us anymore, it's all about their mates!)
They're 13+ now so we let them arrange their own plans but point out they'll have to sort travel arrangements.
Maybe get yours acquainted with a local bus timetable now if they don't live near their friends etc A bit of independence is good for them.
We do the odd day at a cookery school, football/netball training day etc but I know when we've crammed too much in they've complained. Sometimes kids just want to chill - like we all do!

Agree with everybody else, stop organising them

Thank so much for the replies. I really appreciate the thoughts and ideas.

I should have did, they are DS11 and DD13. DS has adhd and dyspraxia ( hence sports camps being tricky), DD has struggled with her mental health lately. Their needs are perhaps why I’m overthinking it ( I don’t want to screw up)

I agree about unstructured time being good, but am also conscious that DD has struggled left to her own devices ( in a way she didn’t when younger). I’m thinking a mixture of paces and activities would be good.

Lots of the ideas above are things we too have enjoyed in the past and it’s good to know older kids can enjoy them too, with a few tweaks.

We have a family railcard, and put it to good use. Exploring new places for a day out once a week is really fun.

I’ll be working all summer holidays apart from one week where we’ll be on holiday and a long weekend towards the end of August so mine will be amusing themselves a lot of the time.

My eldest (DD-11) will probably be out with her friends most of the time, my DS is 9 so needs a little more supervision - he will have friends round for play dates or go to their house (I WFH so this is possible for us).

We will do things like water parks, mini golf, we still do the seaside but now they’re a bit older it’s usually things like the arcades and stopping for chips.

Visiting nearby cities that we’re not familiar with for a walk and lunch.

Visiting National Trust sites.

It is difficult to think of ‘enough’ things to do, but there’s a lot to be said for letting your kids entertain themselves.

I work full time and have a 11yr old and 14 yr old with too much holiday. I alternate weeks of camp or activity with weeks of home time (aka minecraft). I wish they'd go out with friends more but since the pandemic they prefer chatting online.

At similar ages, my DM took my sister and I away on a walking holiday for a few days (we stayed in a cottage). It sounds awful, but gave us a chance to talk about everything that was going on. In the evening, we made s'mores and watched movies. Something like that might be good for your DD.