Wedding invite to ceremony only

[Daydreamerinme]

What would you think if your DAunt, who you had always got on well with, only invited you to her wedding ceremony? Another cousin and aunt received the same invite but all other relatives were invited to the full wedding .
This happened about 4 years ago and I was hurt at the time, especially as she’d been to my wedding (whole thing) about 6 months earlier with her then-partner who we had never met before. We didn’t attend the ceremony as it was a 7-hour round trip and also DS was a toddler and we didn’t have established babysitters back then.

I got to thinking about it again when I read on here recently that legally anyone can witness a ceremony so what is the point of an invitation for a ceremony? Is it a slap in the face to pointedly say you are not welcome to the whole wedding?

I have no reason to think I upset her at our wedding and thank you notes were sent.

No big deal really, I was just wondering. Sadly when I declined her invite she has cut me out of her life (and also other aunt and cousin).

Also she had a fairly big wedding judging by the photos on Facebook so I would presume cost wasn’t an issue.

I would think she didn't consider you to be that close to each other unless there was space/cost issues and that's why she reduced the amount of people at the reception? Tbh though if she was willing to cut you out of her life because you missed her wedding considering it was hours away and you had a young child I don't think it's that much of a loss.

She sounds horrible. Her loss.

If she cut you off after you declined the invitation then why are you now concerned about the specifics of a ceremony-only invitation? And why are you bothered now after 4 years?

Were you close before the wedding?

Did you see each other in person/speak on the phone often?

I'd rather have a ceremony-only invite than evening/reception-only to be honest - at least she invited you to the actual wedding part. It's awful that she cut you off though. Are you still thinking about this all this time later because you want to reconnect with her?

Only at a church wedding do you not need an invitation. What was the venue?

@Palavah I just saw a couple of threads on here recently and I started thinking about it a lot more. It has always upset me but I just tried to put it behind me and, as they say, it’s up to the couple who they invite and I would never question any invite.

@playtest12 yes reasonably close. Saw each other about every 2-3 months because we don’t live near each other

@gobbynorthernbird it was a CofE wedding

@Chaoslatte yes I would like to be reconnected with her but sadly it seems that I l, and our two other relatives, aren’t wanted in her life. Maybe we were invited to the ceremony to make her side of the church look fuller?

Maybe she only invited you to the ceremony as she made an assumption that, with a toddler, you wouldn't want to come to the evening part of the wedding?

Isn't the ceremony the best bit? I thought weddings were to celebrate the couple getting married. I can never understand why guests make it about them. It's their wedding. Why would you make it about you?