Any tips for mentally disconnecting anxiety from something?

[Zippidy123]

I've always been an anxious person however I've hit 40 and my anxiety has changed.

I've got a mild medical problem (muscle tension dysphonia) which happens to me about once or twice a month lasting for a few minutes at a time. When it happens it's very embarrassing as my voice breaks when I speak (like a teenager). There's no known cause or warning that it's going to happen.

My anxiety is thriving off it, it's well and truly got its claws into it and I'm now constantly anxious that my voice is going to embarrass me. Its so disproportionate and if I could just disconnected my brain from my throat I know I'd cope with it just fine.

Any suggestions how you switch your thoughts off? I feel trapped in a cycle. I did try and access professional help but it involved a lot of talking which I just couldn't face.

Could you look up some cbt skills? Join an online support group? Some may suggest meditation however I think thays each to their own.

When you have a thought can you say ' OK I hear that thought but I'll address it later'? Then when you have 10 mins or even 5 you can go back to it.

It's not easy by any means. Personally I let my self know the thought does not rule me, take some deep breaths and know the feeling will pass and not ever thought or any need immediate attention but do need to be thought about at a suitable time. Question the thoughts challenge them and know they are only 1 little part of you, they do not define you.

When you have a thought can you say ' OK I hear that thought but I'll address it later'? Then when you have 10 mins or even 5 you can go back to it.

Agree with this. Will take practice but very effective.

Also do you have a strategy for when this happens? You might feel more comfortable if you have a plan. (Eg a flashcard in your bag: "Sorry, my voice has gone. It's muscle tension dysphonia. Normal service will resume in 5-10 mins".)

Thankyou both for taking the time to reply. I really appreciate it. I'll have a look at online CBT.

I love the flashcard idea! Half the problem is knowing how to cope when my voice goes on me, I'm hoping with time I'll figure out a way to manage it but its still very new to me. Its unbelievable how much we take for granted, I didn't even know vocal disorders existed until this, its bloody awful and mines only mild (for now at least!).

I had/have something like this, though not diagnosed. My throat will suddenly close up when I'm nervous. It happened once in a job interview and I croaked and growled my way through it (and got the job).

I don't have a magic cure I'm afraid - it doesn't happen very often now, but in the past I'd just try and ignore it was happening and carry on speaking. Sometimes people have asked if I have a sore throat. I sort of cough and clear my throat as if to say 'huh maybe' but generally say no and carry on.

Bdragon thankyou for sharing your tips with me, it's so good to hear that for some people it gets less frequent. I think a large part of my anxiety is the fear that this is going to happen more and more often and I'll eventually lose my ability to talk.

Ah, no, I don't think that happens. As your anxiety eases off so will the voice thing.

I had a few things I tried as well to ease it - if I was presenting to a group for work, I'd try and tell myself it was just 'a conversation' and try and imagine I was just addressing one person. I also sometimes used to 'warm up' my voice in the mornings, sing, or read something aloud, just get used to loosening my abdomen and throat. I tried some supplements as well - magnesium and ashwaghanda.

I also took diabetone vitamin tablets as I had quite high blood sugar and wanted to try a broader range of vitamins, and they contain iodine and I thought that would cover off if a mild thyroid issue might be contributing to the voice issue (I'd read thyroid issues sometimes give a croaky voice).

it's worth trying a few things - even if it's placebo it might relax you enough to prevent it a little.

CBT along with anti anxiety medication has shown repeatedly to be the best combination of therapy. However, I understand you may not want medication.

So yes, CBT. Also, when anxiety hits, look for something you can see, something you can feel, something you can smell, something you can touch. It grounds you.

Another way of looking at it is to remind yourself that anxiety has no real meaning, your fight or flight is kicking off for no reason. It doesn't mean anything bad will happen. Then accept you feel anxious. Let the feeling wash over you. Easier said than done but it can work. All the best 👍

You've had some good advice already.

Basically what you need to do is to take charge of your anxiety. Do not try to stop the feeling of anxiety - you won't be able to, and it will make you more anxious.

Instead, try challenging the anxiety head on. Treat it like an bully that you are trying to take down. A really good strategy when you are feeling anxious is to mentally invite more anxiety. Try saying out loud, "Go on then! Make my voice break! I dare you!. You have to go in to anxiety to get out of it.

Thank you all, great advice. I'm going to try it all!

Were you diagnosed by a speech and language therapist? Did they offer you any therapy? They can teach you relaxation techniques etc to help.

WhenIgrowolder yes I'm having S&LT, it's helping a little bit.