How to be sexy?!

[chipbootay]

NC for this as feel quite daft. Dh and I have a fairly vanilla sex life. Both fairly low libido but when we do have sex it's really enjoyable and I kind of wish we made the effort more often. It's been a while for us (a few months) due to some health issues but we have some child free time over the weekend and I think it's on the cards.

Dh has quite subtlety mentioned that he'd like me to wear some sexy lingerie (stockings) as he really likes that. I'm not particularly body confident and have never dressed up before. But he's expressed it and since I'm keen to get things going a bit more I feel like I should make the effort. It's not like I don't want to, it's just that I struggle to act or feel sexy. How do I go about this?!

It's easier to be sexy for your partner when you feel confident in yourself. I would therefore suggest you find some lingerie that you feel comfortable in. DH will think you look amazing! And his reaction will make you feel more confident and sexy

It comes from within. In my late teens and 20's I had the body but not the confidence. In my 30's and now 40's my body is much heavier, lumps, bumps, stretch marks, cellulite etc. But I feel more confident and sexier and comfortable with myself more so than I ever did when I had the body to match. I don't know why!

I don't think it's something you can learn.

Don't ever do anything that makes you feel uncomfortable just to please someone else.

That said, have a fun weekend

If he's asking he finds you sexy.
Don't think of how you see you (sometimes we can be our own worst nightmare) think of how he sees you. And by the sounds of it he likes what he sees.

Do you think you’ll feel sexy in stockings? Works for some people but not everyone.

You probably need a bit of inspiration - are there films or music that has made you feel sexy on the past? Or take a look at some instagram lingerie influencers with similar bodies to yours. A bath and a body lotion. A glass of wine is a short cut.

I just think I'll feel a bit self conscious. Which is ridiculous with my own husband because I regularly walk around the house naked and he's seen me give birth and he still wants to shag me 😂 it's just the performance side of it I guess. Like ok I'll put these stockings on and then what? How do I act?

I bought a body stocking and was the same as you, so shy about it, DH asked me to put it on and I basically put it on and dived under the covers to hide he soon put me at ease about it. I do recommend body stockings though, love honey has lots, they come with the stockings incorporated and are fairly comfortable and stretchy but look v sexy. Stiff basques and garters and belts are a bit too much faff for me.

Shein has lots of nice underwear too, v cheap, questionable ethically though supposedly but I'm not too clued up on that, I think a lot of retailers are.

Imo body stockings are not sexy at all. I think it makes you look like a slab of of meat with the netting around you! Honestly not that flattering unless you are a Victoria's secret model😅