Handhold please

[iLovee]

I'm feeling very emotionally fragile right now and need some words of encouragement please

I have a 7 month old baby who is going through a very tricky, very grizzly phase at the moment. He will only nap on me, is up every 2 hours in the night and normally takes at least 45 mins to settle and is just very hard work atm. I'm struggling to cope tbh.

My husband is away in the States on business this week, and my parents were supposed to come and help me but have covid so now can't. Husband isn't back until Sunday evening. My in laws are too busy looking after other grandchildren, and I've let them know how much I'm struggling but they don't seem to care.

I've been up 4 times with the baby already
Ive told my husband how overwhelmed I'm feeling but he has been useless and offered no words of reassurance or encouragement. We are going through a very rough patch at the moment.

I'm crying my eyes out atm and know I should be trying to get some sleep but can't turn off my brain . I'm feeling very very alone right now.

Sending hugs.

I would suggest playing white noise and trying to sleep with baby safely beside you xxx

. That sounds tough. Could you ask your husband to ask his parents to visit?

Just take it hour by hour or minute by minute. You just need to keep baby and yourself fed. Try some deep breathing when the baby is asleep just to relax.

The middle of the night can feel so lonely can't it ?Maybe your baby is getting to the teething stage and that could be why he is a bit grizzly. Does he stay asleep if you put him down after he has fallen asleep on you ?If so I would cuddle him til he goes over while you're having a soothing warm drink and don't lift him if he's just having a bit of a snuffle or fidgeting. If you want to comfort him just give his head a stroke or gently pat his back. When he does nap or settles well you try to do the same and when your husband comes home make sure you use his jet lag to your advantage. You will feel so much stronger once you manage a solid few hours. Sending you 🫂

Handholding here.

when I have nights like this I find reminding myself that we will sleep eventually helpful.

That constant thought of “I’ll never get any sleep” just winds me up further and stops me calming down. Rather than try to sleep, just try to relax. So a nice soothing drink, warm blankets and sone soft music while you snuggle together.

Sending hugs to you, it can feel like the loneliest time. Nothing I can say will make it magically better, but know it does get better. I promise. Take it hour by hour, don't worry about how much sleep you get (I found counting it made it worse!) and be kind to yourself. If you're feeding lots, make sure you've got snacks and drinks, put the radio on (anything, I used to find the random talking of radio 4 comforting) and rest, even if it's not sleeping it will make a difference. You've got this, you're amazing.

Its so tough when you are on your own with the baby all night, it can be very lonely, tiring and mentally draining. DD was not much of a sleeper, and DH worked nights so I have got the t-shirt in doing the nights on your own. I remember staying up watching bloody info-commercials and the shopping channel at 2am in the morning (this was the 90s!).