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Original poster

Is counselling always a good thing?

105 replies

AutumnOrange · 30/05/2022 19:58

I am currently 4 sessions in counselling via work and am starting to wonder how helpful it is. I feel so shit after each session. Stuff is dredged up by the counsellor that I had successfully buried. Talking about it won’t change it. So what is the point? I feel lower now than I did before counselling! Does anyone understand what I mean?

OP posts:
MsEverywhere · 01/06/2022 19:56

Wallywobbles · 31/05/2022 20:15

I'be seen quite a few counselors, psychologists and one psychiatrist. The latter was the best. He talked I listened. He gave me homework. 4 sessions later I felt like I was done.

I saw another very good one for just one sessions. He was the head of mental health services at Reading Uni way back when.

Then I've seen 4 others who were basically a bit shit. My rule of thumb is the less they talk the shitter they are.

The worst are those that leave you rambling, stumbling and sobbing and then ask you a pointless question at the end.

The good ones alter you view of the problem and make you work.

Completely agree with this. Yes! Yes! The good ones alter your view! The good ones actually talk! They have knowledge and expertise that they impart to help you!

Smartsub · 01/06/2022 20:09

MsEverywhere · 01/06/2022 19:56

Completely agree with this. Yes! Yes! The good ones alter your view! The good ones actually talk! They have knowledge and expertise that they impart to help you!

Show quote history

That's interesting because mine kept saying it was my session and that the "talk" had to come from me. I can talk to myself if that's all it is.

Goonerz · 01/06/2022 20:26

There is a world of a difference between talking to yourself and talking to a therapist whose judgement you trust and respect
For me, being able to say out loud that "my parents were sick fuckers who destroyed my childhood" and for her to agree and vaidate my feelings was a huge milestone.

Jubileeeeeeee · 01/06/2022 20:33

I has 14 CBT sessions for OCD and it changed my life. I also had 6 sessions of counselling arranged by carers support when my DF was dying and I was overwhelmed with caring for my DM and that was fantastic for me. I’m currently going through some health stuff and will arrange some more sessions.
it definitely works for me.

Attractinglife · 03/06/2022 15:42

Goonerz · 01/06/2022 20:26

There is a world of a difference between talking to yourself and talking to a therapist whose judgement you trust and respect
For me, being able to say out loud that "my parents were sick fuckers who destroyed my childhood" and for her to agree and vaidate my feelings was a huge milestone.

The Samaritans do that and they are free. They are actually brilliant at that. And I have found better than counsellors as the counsellors who offered this 'listening ear' seemed to want to keep a level of detachment whereas the Samaritans just made me feel like they genuinely cared I was in distress and showed they cared. They were more human. I agree there is a place for that. But that feeling heard, whilst for some is the only step they need, but for others is only the first step in what they need. What people are saying on this thread is that when they expected more of their therapists, actual help to move on from their pain, that their therapists never did that.

That's interesting because mine kept saying it was my session and that the "talk" had to come from me. I can talk to myself if that's all it is The two good counsellors I have had did talk. So much that I would take copious notes of what they said to keep!

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