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Original poster

I blurted out a Mumsnet saying to my nearly 12 year old niece

29 replies

TroysMammy · 25/05/2022 11:53

And she nearly wet herself laughing.

I took my niece to my parents as she was staying with them overnight and my DM wanted to wash her school top. My DM, before hanging it outside to dry asked my niece to remind her to bring it in later. I said, out of earshot of my DM and to my niece "because if you leave clothes out all night the spiders will wipe their willies on them".

I couldn't believe I said that to a nearly 12 year old. I truly am an awful Auntie 😂

OP posts:
emmathedilemma · 25/05/2022 11:56

you're a brilliant Auntie!!

StopStartStop · 25/05/2022 11:57

Bit disappointed. Thought you might have told her to 'Get her ducks in a row' and 'Fuck the fuck off to the far side of fuck, and then fuck off some more.'

😁

grapehyacinthisactuallyblue · 25/05/2022 12:14

Meh. Is that even funny to 12 years old?

Circumferences · 25/05/2022 12:16

What, not "leave the bastard!"

HSKAT · 25/05/2022 12:17

Hope you advised DM to go NC if niece didn't remind her!!

BlueChampagne · 25/05/2022 12:21

Made me laugh!

PuppyMonkey · 25/05/2022 12:23

YABU because you should have said the clothes would get darked on.Wink

han01uk · 25/05/2022 12:32

I did tell my daughter to "give her head a wobble" the other day! Clearly too much time on Mumsnet....

TheWayTheLightFalls · 25/05/2022 12:33

Ha! I just today had a conversation with my four year old in which I said that nothing was for only boys/girls unless you needed a penis or vagina to operate it. I should have said vulva for the full MN bingo.

Hallyup89 · 25/05/2022 12:37

TheWayTheLightFalls · 25/05/2022 12:33

Ha! I just today had a conversation with my four year old in which I said that nothing was for only boys/girls unless you needed a penis or vagina to operate it. I should have said vulva for the full MN bingo.

I don't think you should have said that to your 4 year old at all tbh.

Quisto · 25/05/2022 12:46

My 20 yr old DS left his washing on the line overnight. ( I'm not a monster, I have a broken arm at the moment) DS 10 yr old came downstairs the next morning, looked outside and said " Oh no! DB's washing has been darked on and will have had spider willies rubbed all over it". Proud mummy moment. 😂😎

Ihatethenewlook · 25/05/2022 12:49

Hallyup89 · 25/05/2022 12:37

I don't think you should have said that to your 4 year old at all tbh.

Show quote history

Why?

Purplepistolpolly · 25/05/2022 12:54

Ihatethenewlook · 25/05/2022 12:49

Why?

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Yes why? I think that’s a great response @TheWayTheLightFalls

I’ll be using that one!

Lolliepoppie · 25/05/2022 12:55

Ha! I just today had a conversation with my four year old in which I said that nothing was for only boys/girls unless you needed a penis or vagina to operate it. I should have said vulva for the full MN bingo.

Totally inappropriate and unnecessary to bring genitalia into an explanation for a 4 year old in this context. It’s a sexualised quip. Nothing was for only boys/girls would have been enough.

Overthewine · 25/05/2022 13:02

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

NannyGythaOgg · 25/05/2022 13:02

Hallyup89 · 25/05/2022 12:37

I don't think you should have said that to your 4 year old at all tbh.

Show quote history

I think it was an ace thing to say. It's something that cannot be said too early or repeated often enough.

TheWayTheLightFalls · 25/05/2022 13:14

For context she is a very intelligent if slightly literal young thing who lately has gone down the “but that’s only for girls/boys” line. I’ve tried explaining that every colour, food, TV show etc is for whoever wants to partake of it, but after weeks and weeks I wanted to appeal to her sense of logic. The difference between boys and girls is down to biological fact, so whether or not you can wear red or watch Paw Patrol clearly doesn’t factor in. I don’t think there’s an age too early to know that.

658Doyouknowwheremysparkis · 25/05/2022 13:16

Teach her ‘cunty chops’ now that would put you in the ‘bad auntie’ badass gang….

Johnnysgirl · 25/05/2022 13:21

God, not this again. It was about 15 years ago, let it die peacefully, ffs.

It was never that hilarious, yet it's routinely resurrected every couple of months lest anyone move on.

Johnnysgirl · 25/05/2022 13:22

Quisto · 25/05/2022 12:46

My 20 yr old DS left his washing on the line overnight. ( I'm not a monster, I have a broken arm at the moment) DS 10 yr old came downstairs the next morning, looked outside and said " Oh no! DB's washing has been darked on and will have had spider willies rubbed all over it". Proud mummy moment. 😂😎

Really?

Velvian · 25/05/2022 13:26

I frequently remind people that no good deed goes unpunished. Life made so much more sense to me after I read that phrase on MN.

Original poster
TroysMammy · 25/05/2022 18:46

@658Doyouknowwheremysparkis

There is a neighbour a few doors up who I already mutter "cunt" when I see him or his van. Give it time, maybe when she's 15😂

OP posts:
SomePosters · 25/05/2022 19:04

catheters are designed for use according to genitalia. As are continence pads.

no one said it was a sex toy, a 4 year old wouldn’t think of that.

i wish more people were this upfront with their children instead of making up nonsense and obfuscating anything that makes them uncomfortable

empireemmy · 25/05/2022 20:03

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the request of the poster.

DaanSaaf · 25/05/2022 20:06

There are some fucking fun sponges on here tonight 🙄