Was being warned off by colleague?

[TellySavalashairbrush]

We have a new colleague in my small team. I had been prewarned by a colleague in another team in a different branch about the fact that this person has been moved on as she was generally very lazy and not as knowledgeable as she had portrayed herself to others.
SHe is somewhat theatrical, loud and able to sell herself extremely well (which I think is the reason she has held so many roles and had so many jobs) I refused to prejudge her and made her as welcome as I would anyone else .
a few months ago we were given a project to work on together- she specifically asked management for me to do it with her (dhe is more experienced in this particular field) I was puzzled as to why, but on reflection think it’s because I am very easy going, hate confrontation and am a bloody hard worker.
To cut it short, she has proven to indeed be lazy, pretty short on knowledge and I basically do the bulk of the work. I think she can tell I’m not impressed but I haven’t said anything to management yet.
Today she pulled me aside and we had an odd conversation mainly involving het saying we had to take care of each other, then saying she was aware people were bad mouthing her but that she was highly respected by senior management and had enough life experience to be able to crush people and big herself up. This was all said in an over friendly voice and with a smile. She also said my own manager (not hers had said she was Fantastic and ‘had her back’.
I can’t explain why but I had a really uneasy feeling during and following the conversation. Like I was being warned to keep quiet. I had no intention of saying anything but probably would if I continued to be doing all the work.
How do I deal with this person? My boss is lovely and very supportive to me, and I don’t want to seem paranoid but I admit I can be a doormat sometimes and I can see this getting out of hand. Do I raise it with management?

Her "friendly" chat that involved the words "enough life experience to crush people" was anything but friendly... it was designed to intimidate you and to ensure you kept quiet.

If you're comfortable, I'd raise this with your manager and say everything you've said here. Stick to the facts, which speak for themselves: state the unequal workload and state exactly what was said to you.

I would steer clear of anymore 1-2-1 conversations with her; get everything in writing. Make notes about your contributions and hers. She has definitely issued a warning, the cow. Can you go off sick for a week and let management watch her fail?

Exactly what @Poppins2016 has said. You’ve snagged yourself a bully and if you don’t deal with this now, it will only get worse. Now is not the time to be a doormat.
be factual with your boss regarding the joint project and what was subsequently said. no emotional stuff. You will feel better and more in control once it’s done.
fwiw. Bullies are often all bluff, if you stand up to them they often fall. The senior management appear to know what’s going on if a) she’s been moved b) you’ve already been warned about her. Management might be trying to give her enough rope so they can legitimately let her go.

Yes, I think it was a form of manipulation to silence you.

You go to your manager and say "I have no idea what just happened but I feel very uneasy." Explain what she said, what the work load situation is and that you have no idea what to make of the one sided conversation she had with you.

Then let your manager deal with it. But you can't let it slide, you have found yourself a lazy bully. They expend more energy making sure nobody reveals their lack of work that they would ever expend on actually working. And I have no idea why or what joy they get out of life, but they do exist!

as well as being lazy, loud and lacking knowledge, she is a manipulative bully.

tbh I’m not sure why you ignored the warning from the colleague in another team. It was nice of you, I suppose, but naive.

she’s likely bullshitting about management having her back. I’d tell management the whole lot and say you don’t want to be put on projects with her ever again due to the threat of being “crushed”. Don’t leave anything out and also mention the fact that previous colleagues have reported similar issues.

the number one thing is that she actually said that she’d crush you. That is bullying and intimidation and your employer is responsible for ensuring you aren’t subjected to that in a work environment. This is actually worse than the incompetence etc.

show her you aren’t to be messed with - or she will continue treating you this way. Tell employer you will not work with her. And that the stress and fear involved in working with her would necessitate a GP visit and sign off.

Agree with @BlueKaftan about keeping things in writing including what you have done (that will show what she has done which will not be half of it).

I also think you need a conversation with your boss. She picked you not just because you are working hard but because, as you said yourself, you are a bit if a doormat so much less likely to go and complain. And easier to manipulate.

If she has been moved position because she was lazy and manipulative, be assured that management KNOWS she is lazy and manipulative.

Thank you all for your helpful responses. Just wanted to know I wasn’t over reacting. I will arrange to speak to my boss. fortunately we are not working together again for a couple of weeks which gives me breathing space and hopefully time to get this sorted.

Use email or something with a written paper trail, so that if it does go to management, you have a journal of evidence to back everything you say, e.g. Confirm everything possible, e.g. Who agreed what on tasks, who's doing which parts, how progress is , ect.

Other wise if it's just verbal then it's x says etc

Try not to be alone with her, she won't say that shit in front of witnesses. Do you have people on your team or working physically close by that you know well and who can be helpful? You don't have to give the details, just say that you have been slightly uncomfortable when with X and it might be nothing but you would appreciate it if they stay nearby if they see X trying to corner you.

Don't let her book a meeting room with just the two of you, say it's not confidential so it can be in the main office area or make up a reason someone else might have useful input on the project so there is someone else in the meeting. Failing that say that you're going to record the meeting so that you don't forget anything, she'll object but say that you find it very helpful. Don't turn the recorder/your phone off until after you've left the meeting room.

Keep updating the project by email, not verbally. Make sure you phrase it so that it shows what you've done/are doing and what she's done/is doing. So not 'the report will be finished on Tuesday' but 'I will have finished the report on Tuesday'. Ask your manager if you can cc her/him in on the email updates.

I would also approach your manager,
possibly in the guise of asking their advice on handling the situation as you found the whole thing very odd indeed. Which it was, what a weirdo. But being entirely honest about the conversation as it happened so your manager has all the facts. It may be that this particular incident is a case of ‘x says this, y says that’ but if it adds up to a pattern of behaviour, hopefully management will have the sense to see it.

Good advice above.

The "crush you" statement is very threatening and should be treated as such.

A meeting with your own boss flagging your concern, which you should follow up with an email will show your boss how seriously YOU took her attempts to bully, manipulate and threaten you.

As is telling your boss your intention to record any further meetings.

She really isn't that bright to have been so overt in her threats.

How did it go OP? Did you speak with your manager? I would want to know if this was happening to my team.