Such a proud moment for a mother...

[Greensleeves]

...when your teenage son appears for the first time in full Dressing-Gown of Doom regalia, snuffling feebly and declaring that he has pneumonia and needs to go to hospital! <disclaimer - he doesn't have pneumonia, he has a mild cold and we all have it as well>

My boy is becoming a man

Have he developed his Poorly Voice yet?

Bless him!

It's coming along very nicely...and the performative hawking/gobbing into the kitchen sink was a lovely touch (dh did snap at him for that)

The moment every mother dreams of! It’s normally at this point that my DH start demanding soup of the Heinz variety only!

Have you tried giving several extremely sensible options (take a paracetamol, go have a hot shower, etc), yet? If he ignores and/or sighs at each and every one of them then you know he's made it.

Lol DS (6) doesn't yet know the word pneumonia but has basically done this.

Try saying "maybe you should see the doctor" and report back.

I did suggest the GP, he moaned and shuffled a bit and said he really thought he needed A&E. I told him the triage nurse would laugh at him and offered him a lemsip, which he declined with a mournful sigh

Sounds like a serious case of man flu. Call an ambulance without delay!!!!

My mum used to look after my DB when he did this as a teen with lemsip (hot Robinson lemon squash) he would quickly recover enough to play on computer games and declare it a wonder cure 🤣

My son had his first shave last week. I spent 20 big ones on a razor with a magnetic stand and £5 on clear shaving gel.

He cut himself.

I taught him how to stick a bit of bog roll on to stop the bleeding.

They grow up so fast.

Has he gone as far as the Slippers of Despair?

For your sake, I hope he is better soon 😁

Ooh no, he doesn't have any Slippers of Despair - I shall have to buy him some!

DS is just heading towards puberty but if he takes after his stepdad he will be wearing his dressing gown of doom at the slightest sniffle

My fifteen years old did this a few weeks ago,he made sure he told me in the evening and again before bed ,( school the next day) tbf he did have a cough which he got over quickly and passed on to me 🙄

Oh god the dreaded poorly voice. Usually accompanied by extreme martyrdom. 'No... It's fine... I'll be OK... Don't worry about me... I'll cope... (sniffle sniffle)'

I've heard turning the WiFi off is a magical cure for colds. The germs spread via the WiFi waves you see.

Aye do that, but make sure they are Very Shuffley.