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Original poster

Does your birthday make you sad?

52 replies

Cloud16 · 14/05/2022 22:00

My birthday is coming up and it's made me a bit emotional.

I really don't know why. I'm happy with life generally, but I just feel like crying when I think of my birthday.

Not fussed about getting older or anything. I think birthdays are becoming less fun each year for me, and I feel very adult and responsible these days.

OP posts:
bloodywhitecat · 14/05/2022 22:03

It didn't used to but I think it will this year as it is yet another reminder that I am one year older and DH will be forever 57.

JemimaTiggywinkle · 14/05/2022 22:06

I always feel slightly melancholy around my birthday, always have done - i’m only 31.

Si1ver · 14/05/2022 22:07

bloodywhitecat · 14/05/2022 22:03

It didn't used to but I think it will this year as it is yet another reminder that I am one year older and DH will be forever 57.

Oh that's so sad. I'm so sorry.

Mine was yesterday and yes I was sad. But honestly that's tied in with my Dad dying more than anything else.

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Events & celebrations
MondeoFan · 14/05/2022 22:08

I always feel sad on my birthday. Mostly down to disappointment as people don’t do the same for me as what I do for their birthdays. I have a BIG birthday coming up next month and dreading it to be honest

Whoatealltheminieggs · 14/05/2022 22:10

I have extreme health anxiety so I’m just glad to still be here frankly.

Mindymomo · 14/05/2022 22:10

My birthday was yesterday, cannot believe I am 61, in my head I am around mid forties. We don’t make a fuss of birthdays, but do try and eat out as a family, we don’t do presents, only got plant and bottle of wine from my brother.

SpeedofaSloth · 14/05/2022 22:11

A bit, yes.

Goldengoosey · 14/05/2022 22:11

Yes I’m always a bit sad and emotional and it’s nothing to do with getting older. I’m always somewhat relieved when it’s over. I can’t explain it. My mum says I’ve always been ‘funny’ on my birthday. She says she can’t remember a single birthday party when I was a child where there were no tears. Must have been a right wee drama llama from the get go 😂

PrisonerofZeroCovid · 14/05/2022 22:12

Yeah a bit but I am quite a lot older than you. Just realising I probably don’t have as much time left as I’ve had, and definitely not as much quality time

Fritilleries · 14/05/2022 22:12

I hate celebrating. People I work with ask what I'm doing and I literally have no clue. I've no friends to have a party with. Just OH and family. I hate it. Hate the pressure to do something, hate the lack of cards. Hate getting older and looking tired. I wish I could be 16 and excited about my life instead of just, meh. And yes, fully aware to age is a privilege.

Original poster
Cloud16 · 14/05/2022 22:15

So so sorry @bloodywhitecat 💗 xxxxx

OP posts:
emmetgirl · 14/05/2022 22:16

Not so much sad as scared....can't believe I'll be 56 next birthday....!

PrincessRamone · 14/05/2022 22:17

Yes, I don’t like it. I keep hoping people will forget it but they don’t. I think it is the pressure to be happy on the day. I’m an introvert and I don’t really like the attention, even when it is low-key.

Plus DH always does this thing where he makes out that he is going all out for me even though it’s a big deal because … he’s sick / he’s hurt his back / he’s worried about his mum / he’s feeling depressed / other random thing. Lots of “brave smiles” because it’s my “special day” and he wouldn’t want to let me down.

I’d much rather just not have it at all.

Fritilleries · 14/05/2022 22:17

PrincessRamone · 14/05/2022 22:17

Yes, I don’t like it. I keep hoping people will forget it but they don’t. I think it is the pressure to be happy on the day. I’m an introvert and I don’t really like the attention, even when it is low-key.

Plus DH always does this thing where he makes out that he is going all out for me even though it’s a big deal because … he’s sick / he’s hurt his back / he’s worried about his mum / he’s feeling depressed / other random thing. Lots of “brave smiles” because it’s my “special day” and he wouldn’t want to let me down.

I’d much rather just not have it at all.

He sounds like a knob.

cigarettesNalcohol · 14/05/2022 22:18

Feel exactly the same op and I can't put my finger on why. I am a happy person with a nice life so why feel like this .. ? I put all my efforts into my children's birthdays to compensate the unexplained sadness around my own birthdays.

MuddlingThroughLife · 14/05/2022 22:18

Getting older is a great privilege. Embrace it and celebrate x

PrincessRamone · 14/05/2022 22:23

@Fritilleries about birthdays, yes. Fortunately (for his sake) he’s quite considerate at other times.

VintageGibbon · 14/05/2022 22:25

I always feel sad before my birthday. But the day itself is usually really good fun as DH usually makes an effort.

TravelDreamLife · 14/05/2022 22:26

I dread them. A reminder that no one does anything for me, most don't even remember to send a message, even though I work hard for everyone else's birthday. I'm reminded of spending my last big birthday crying because all DH said was 'what are you buying yourself?' & still thinks that was fine. He'd just gotten a huge party I organised. So, it's just a reminder of where I rank in my friends & family's lives.

Original poster
Cloud16 · 14/05/2022 22:30

Totally agree that it is a privilege to age. Maybe it's the passing of time that makes me a bit sad, like that's another year over and gone (which I know is dramatic!).

Last month I found out my close relative has terminal cancer and there's been a few family deaths in the last couple of years. I do feel the older generations in my family are starting to become frail and pass on and that frightens me, as I will really miss them. I think this will be my last birthday with my ill relative. Things will keep changing with each year, and not everyone will be around to see the changes. That makes me really sad!!!

Wow I'm a right mood killer tonight 🙃

OP posts:
elle1005 · 14/05/2022 22:31

It used to make me sad. It was a fear of getting older, which I think affects women a lot more than men. Societal pressure that shouldn't be there.

New Year's used to make me sad as well as I'd think "there goes another year....".

When I got to about 28, I suddenly snapped out of it. Tomorrow is never guaranteed and I started just being grateful about the fact that I could turn 29, I could turn 30, I could turn 40 etc etc. Because not everyone will.

PinkBuffalo · 14/05/2022 22:31

It makes me sad
just reminds me of everything i have lost
so sorry bloodywhitecat I been there myself, my sister will forever be 33 it is so hard

amicissimma · 14/05/2022 22:33

I'm always slightly taken aback that I've survived another 365 days. There's no particular reason why I shouldn't (nor any reason why I should!), but it does seem a bit of an achievement.

Original poster
Cloud16 · 14/05/2022 22:34

Also yeah, my DH normally goes all out for my birthday, but this year, he has been really stressed with work. He bought me flowers and has ordered a couple of things, but all I really wanted was a small family get together. We had a small family drinks and dinner today, but I could feel his stress during it. I couldn't really enjoy myself because of it, and I just felt really flat when everyone left.

OK that's enough moaning from me!!!!!!

OP posts:
SausageMonkey2 · 14/05/2022 22:35

Not usually. I share mine with my dad or did. He passed about three weeks ago so yes. Probably. This year and many others will be sad.