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***Trigger warning** self harm and DD over Russia

28 replies

Donaldfuck · 14/05/2022 18:43

Hi

I’ve posted about DD before, I spent last night at A&E with her as she had tried to cut her arms over her fear about nuclear war.

The cuts were superficial and no serious damage done to her. But when we came home and on advice from doctors to ask her to hand over her cutting implements she also told me she had planned to take a massive overdose and had been collating pills for when the apocalypse hits.

I have removed those as well, she has obviously been hoarding for a while as I hadn’t actually noticed them going.

I need some help here, I need someone very calm to tell me what I can say to my child as I’m at a loss and I’m clearly fucking this up.

Please help.

OP posts:
ThreeLocusts · 14/05/2022 22:28

So sorry OP. My daughter jumped into a river last year and we ended up in psychiatric a+e. They said to hide medications and sharp objects. I've now got pills hidden in about 5 different places and knives in two.

I asked at the pharmacist's about safes for medication - they recommended I buy a lockable suitcase. I hesitate since, if she got in there, she would find everything in one place. But some sort of strongbox should work as long as you take good care of the key?

The main point the psychiatrists made is that removing/ reducing the means/opportunities for self-harm is, in the short term, the most effective thing you can do.

On a different note, it's a garbled logic to want to kill yourself because you're about to die. Why not just wait for the bomb to drop so you can at least die with your loved ones? I wonder what else may be going on in her mind.

All the best.

Scoobydoooo99 · 15/05/2022 07:18

I’m so sorry your daughter is feeling this, I too have not coped with all these nuclear threats ect, not to the point your daughter is at, however it’s awful. I can’t offer any advice at all unfortunately, I just really hope your daughter gets better soon

sashh · 15/05/2022 07:54

GazeboLantern · 14/05/2022 21:57

When my dd was trying not to hurt herself, she painted herself instead. Facepaint or makeup, on her arms, legs, torso or face. All sorts of extravagance. She then usually wiped it off without showing me. I only know because she told me about it when she opened up about the self harm. It helped her in recovery as well.

Once dd had been having therapy for a while, and recognised that she needed help - and that it was ok to need help - we would sometimes use these sheets to help talk about the thoughts that upset her. At first it was very much that these were my sheets, she felt no ownership of them, almost as if they were too much for her. But eventually she asked for her own copies.

If they're not clear, Google 'unhelpful thinking patterns'. There are many variations.

You can't cure your dd. Don't blame yourself for that. She needs professionally trained help. But you can love her and support her as you are already doing.

Every thing here ^

Has she tried icecubes? rather than cutting holding ice cubes can give you a similar sensation.

Can you talk about what would happen if the order was given? Maybe look into Able Archer with her - well you look first.

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