It's a wedding one. Help!

[Hedonism]

Here is my dilemma:

I am due to go to a festival in the summer with some friends. My favourite band is performing. It has been postponed twice, from 2020 and then from 2021, so the date has been in the diary for at least a year, tickets purchased 2.5 years ago. Really looking forward to it. It would be all day / all evening.

Last week I received an evening invitation to a colleague's wedding. Also postponed from 2020, and of course it's the same date as the festival. I would love to go and celebrate with him, he's been through some tough times and I supported him through a lot of it (I was his manager, but I have moved on in the organisation and am not any more). Some other colleagues and ex-colleagues are also going and it would be nice to catch up with them.

Wwyd?

Go to the festival.

Just send a really nicely worded decline and send a card and gift (if you wanted to) around the time of the wedding.

I wouldn’t feel bad about it - just one of those things. You’ve got a prior engagement, not a big deal

what Googlecanthelpme said

Say I’m really sorry I’m already away at a festival that weekend, have a lovely time. And then send a nice card and gift if you want, enjoy your festival, job done!

I wouldn’t miss an all day/night even that I’d been looking forward to for literally years for an evening only invite to a work colleague’s wedding. I’d regretfully decline, send a card and maybe a small gift too like a bottle of fizz (or whatever he’d like).

Up to you really do whatever you'd prefer

Go to the festival as it's only an evening invitation. It seems he didn't appreciate all the support you gave him enough to invite you to the whole wedding......

You regretfully decline the wedding invitation and say that you already have another commitment arranged for that day.

Festival definitely, it was in the diary first, you’ve been looking forward to it and you’d let down the friends you've booked to go with.

it’s a evening only invitation so you’d be on the “nice to have” rather than “must” come list. Nice card, gift if you want to and maybe meet up outside of work with the group at a different date.

Am surprised you have to ask?
Send a polite reply saying you'd love to be there but have another engagement, and look forward to a catch up with him and new wife to look at photos at some stage in the future...(if you want to)

Festival of course.

i wouldn’t miss my favourite band for a colleague’s wedding! Most weddings are dull

Thank you, you've confirmed what I thought. I was just starting to doubt myself!

Festival!

He’s invited you to a party and you wouldn’t miss the festival if it was his birthday or another occasion.

Festival

this isn’t a dilemma. You aren’t even invited to the full wedding.

Sorry im away that weekend, been planned pre covid. So sorry i cant make it but all the best

Festival

Festival. You’ve received an evening invite so it would be something I’d go to if I fancied if I’d nothing else on. The festival likely cost a fortune and you’ve wanted to go for two years. It’s a no brainer - send a nice card declining but wishing them well.