Petrified something is going to happen to my kids

[disappointed101]

Every time my kids complain of pain or are ill, I catastrophise and start endless googling, convincing myself they have cancer. Does this happen to anyone else? It is making me sick with worry. I do it to myself also when I am unwell. What can I do about this or are my fears valid?

See your GP.

And if that doesn’t yield results consider if you can afford private therapy. I know that is much easier said than done. This isn’t normal though, and it sounds miserable for you!

Every parent worry about their kids, but yours sounds extreme. Get help for your anxiety and stop googling.
I have a child with multiple health issues. They normally find what's wrong with the child if there's something.

No, this is not normal and your fears are not valid. Sounds like you have health anxiety and you need to see your GP because this is not a good way to live.

Hi OP, I can relate.

I lost both my parents to cancer within a few years of one another so for a long time cancer was in the backdrop in my life including at the time I married and had children. I didn’t really realise it at the time or make the connection but things came to a head one day when I was bathing my youngest son and panicked about what I thought was a lump on his body. I took him to see the GP who was great. She took a look and saw nothing of concern. She then turned to me and asked what had happened in my life to make me think this way.

A few years on now and my children are teenagers. Honestly, with hindsight I can now see that I was incredibly anxious and I certainly catastrophised. I worried if they were unwell and I was anxious when they were out of my sight. I remember going to see them off on a school coach trip once and parents around me were jumping with joy as the coach pulled away (saying they could hit the pub now) while I felt dread at the prospect of an weekend of anxiety and worrying about my children.

I tried very hard to keep my anxiety quiet from my children because I wanted them to be independent and confident despite my feelings. Looking back now, I can see that it was anxiety. And I understand why I felt it; I don’t blame myself, I know it was triggered by events in my life around the time my children were very young.

I wonder if there’s something in the background of your life, OP that could have set this off?

I have a couple of hobbies that absorb me now and distract me. I’ve worked hard on rewiring my brain. I still worry (it’s part of parenthood) but I think at a more normal level now.