Is anyone about, had a horrible morning, mum seizure (TW)

[tomissmymum]

My mum recently been told she most likely has early onset dementia .(abnormal brain scan shows brain shrinking or wear and tear or something)

she used to have seizures all the time (non epileptic) but they kind of stopped a while ago.

this morning I was giving her a hug and she had a funny jump/shiver type thing, I told her I’d help her have a shower and next thing she collapsed on top of me, halfway upstairs.

Managed to catch her but she was blue in face/foaming and noisy breathing, I thought she was dying/dead . Screaming and screaming down the phone to 999 . I’ve never in my life felt so frightened. I thought she was dead and that I’d never speak to her again . I can’t get the image out of my head . I’ve seen mum having seizures since I was a baby but this felt different somehow .

Ambulance out within 10 minutes and they rang GP, theh think it’s probably all the same as it used to be, non epileptic, all her obs were fine, they said don’t panic, but oh my God, I can’t stop shaking . I really really thought she was dead .

im sitting on living floor, she’s asleep on sofa, I’m still in my pyjamas and can’t stop shaking. Gp surgery said someone would call me later - usual GP who’s wonderful doesn’t work a Thursday, but I’m terrified .

Hi Op, here for a hand hold if you need it.
I've seen a fair few seizures myself (ambulance service) and appreciate they can look absolutely scary! That's good the ambulance has been out and checked mum over. I wont give any significant medical advice on here but what i would say is just keep an eye on mum until GP phones and see what they have to say. In the mean time you need to make sure you are ok as you will have had a massive fright this morning, get a cup of tea/coffee/breakfast in you if you can, if you have any friends/family around that can maybe come sit with you/chat on phone to keep you company then that is also good.
Hope you here back from GP soon 💐

Thank you, she got a home visit from nurse practitioner - nurse said she thinks it’s all one and the same cause, either mum’s stressed or it’s down to whatever’s wrong with her brain .

I’m still replaying it over and over in my head, I genuinely thought she was dead, I was screaming . I don’t understand why it frightened me so much as I’ve seen it happen a hundred times before but it was so sudden and so different to her normal seizures, absolutely terrifying . I’m terrified it will happen again .

I haven’t managed to eat a proper meal yet, just a couple of biscuits, I’m having a really heavy/painful period too so just miserable . Desperately hoping it doesn’t happen again . I did speak on the phone a bit to a friend which helped a little bit .

She’s still not right, refusing to sleep, refusing to let me leave her bed, refusing to let me use the toilet without standing beside me . Very very very confused . I’ve just threatened to NHS24 that I’m going to drop her at A&E and leave if they don’t help me tonight, I’m desperate .

It came out of the blue, so I can imagine it was a huge shock for you. It’s scary enough seeing a loved one have a seizure when you’re used to it, they’re happening regularly, but you’d got out if the swing of that.
By replaying it over in your head, although it feels horrible, is helping you process what happened. Your mum didn’t die, you did everything right, the ambulance got there quickly because you thought to phone straight away. It’s all part of the processing that it looked so bad but you did everything right.
If you think your mum is more confused that what can be put down to post-seizure confusion ( that sounds clumsy, hope it makes sense) then I’d call an ambulance again. I don’t think you should drive your mum in case anything happens while you’re driving. If you do have to drive put your mum in the back, opposite side to you.
Hope you’re OK.